


The Best Man

by ValkyrieGail



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alpha Steve Rogers, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Amputee Bucky Barnes, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drama & Romance, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Mutual Pining, Omega Bucky Barnes, Scenting, Slow Burn, War Veteran Bucky Barnes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2017-06-29
Packaged: 2018-08-18 19:52:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 79,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8173927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ValkyrieGail/pseuds/ValkyrieGail
Summary: Getting married was stressful enough, but knocking up your best man? Steve Rogers has never claimed to be a model citizen, but when a passionate one night stand turns his world upside down, he must pick up the pieces and decide what he truly wants in life. For Steve, this means choosing between his fiancé or his best friend.Based in an Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamic world.





	1. About last night...

**Author's Note:**

> I love A/B/O dynamics. :p This story is slightly based off of a different culmination of rom-coms I’ve seen in the past. Bucky and Steve are 28, Sharon is 29, and Brock is 34.

_Now_

It happened when Steve had reached a new low in his life. To be fair, he knew it was in no way an excuse for his actions, but he felt that it was an important contributing factor for Sam to know where he was coming from as he sat at the table the morning after the incident looking like a dog with its tail between its legs.

It was while the blonde alpha was having an existential crisis when Sam came out of his room looking rumpled and sleepy-eyed. One look at Steve had the other alpha shaking his head and grumbling, “Nope! It is too damn early for this, Rogers.”

Sam made a beeline for the Keurig despite Roger’s whine of discontentment. After making two mugs of hot coffee and grumbling irritably to himself, he wandered over to his roommate and set a cup in front of the blonde, frowning deeply towards him to communicate his annoyance.

“Mind telling me why you smell like all kinds of _wrong_ this morning?” Sam stared at him from across the table and rubbed at his nose. Steve’s confused, distraught smell made the back of his nasal passage itch in irritation.

Steve’s brow was creased deep in thought, his eyes staying pointedly down at his hands which were sweaty and now gripped tightly together around the handle of the mug.

“Sharon and I had a pretty bad disagreement yesterday.” Steve stated as the first step of his story.

Sam had a feeling that this would be the case. It was no secret in their circle of friends that Steve and Sharon had a very topsy-turvy relationship. They were stubborn in their opinions and it wasn’t unusual for them to clash like thunder clouds and then need time to cool off. They loved each other, but it was a love that came with a lot of work and a lot of breaks over the years. Sam usually compared them to hot air and cold air spinning together to create a destructive tornado of issues. Sometimes that tornado swept through their apartment and left the blonde alpha in the state he was in now; weary and looking lost. Still, this seemed to be worse than the usual after effects of a fight.

“Are you two going to resolve your problems? You have a wedding date set, man.”  Sam pointed out. “I know arguing is basically a sport in your relationship, but you should settle your issues before walking down the aisle.”

At this statement, Steve slouched further, elbows resting on the table as he bent his head forward and ran his fingers through his hair. He let out a deep troubled exhale that sounded all of the alarms in Sam’s head. As a trained counsellor, the dark haired alpha knew what to look for when someone was especially troubled and suffering.

“I don’t know…I really fucked up this time, Sam.”

The other man continued to stare at his blonde headed roommate in reserved anticipation. “I’m going to need more details. Could you please clarify ‘fucked up’ for me?”

“I slept with Bucky.”

There was surprise and then there was complete deadened shock. Sam embodied the second one as he leaned back in his chair, very nearly falling out of it as the confession made his eyes widen in disbelief. It was through sheer will and the fact that Sam had gone through years of specialized training to be a counselor (with an impressive Masters to prove for it) that he didn’t smack Steve upside the head.

There was complete silence as Steve looked to his friend with a miserable, pleading look for advice and unwavering mercy. Sam had always been a rock in their friend group when it came to being the voice of reason, even though he didn’t sign up for that position half of the time.

However, it came with the territory.

The alpha closed his eyes and kept his composure, “Please tell me you mean like a sleepover with popcorn and blanket forts.”

Steve looked up at him dejectedly, eyes rimmed with red.

One look said enough.

“Oh my God, Rogers!” Sam felt himself taken aback that it was indeed the sexual variety; that Steve had banged his childhood friend. That Steve was _still engaged to Sharon_ and had fucked someone else. Had fucked _Bucky_. “Jesus Christ, _Steve_! What the fuck, man!? He’s your best man!”

“I know!” Steve cried out, melting against the table with his arms and chin resting on his forearms while his hands gripped his hair tightly. “I really fucked up big this time. What if I’ve ruined everything?”

“Man, I’ve always supported you, but cheating on your fiancé with your _best man_?” Sam groaned at the absurdity of the situation, “That’s a new low. What were you two even _thinking_?”

Steve didn’t seem pleased with himself as he stared down at the table, his thoughts a torrid mess of self-loathing. He had went over to Bucky’s to have a drink and relax after a rough afternoon arguing with Sharon over work schedule issues, but as he spoke with his omega best friend and the night went on, things progressed and the alpha had made the first move to land a searing kiss to the omega’s inviting lips. It had felt good; too good. It was how the two of them eventually ended up in a mess of limbs on Bucky’s bed, entangled together for most of the night while they were fueled by their compatible scents and lowered inhibitions. Steve was afraid to admit that it was probably the best sex of his life; how they could communicate with their bodies and move with a fluidity and an understanding that spoke volumes of their relationship.

He worried that Bucky would regret what they did or that he had taken advantage of the situation. They didn’t drink enough to merit them being too drunk, but he began to worry that he had definitely overstepped his boundaries. They were both technically in separate relationships, but after the fight with Sharon and the conversation with Bucky explaining his annoyance with his boyfriend, they began to commiserate and drink. This ultimately led to the physical comfort, which led to the step they were not supposed to cross.

Sam brought him out of his reverie with a light push to his shoulder. “Look man, you’ve got to clean up this mess quick. Have you talked to Bucky about what happened?”

Steve bit his lip guiltily.

He hadn’t, but he was too ashamed to confess to his roommate that as soon as morning light began to seep through the window, he had left his best friend without a proper goodbye. He was afraid of the words they had exchanged the night before and what they could mean if they had really been true.

He wasn’t prepared to face those feelings.

He was afraid by the fact that he never wanted to forget what had happened between them.

In the morning when he had woken up, he was wrapped around Bucky; inhaling his familiar calming scent and feeling warm and fuzzy. He had woken up because his phone was vibrating.

When he checked his phone, reality had set in.

 **Sharon** : I’m sorry for being upset with you about your deadlines. I promise to make more of an effort to be there for you. I’m taking next week off so we can work on us. I love you. x.o.

After reading the text, Steve booked it out of their quickly, scared and confused.

He needed time to sort through his thoughts and process what had happened between him and Bucky. He loved and cared about his best friend like a brother and the night before had been a revelation when the omega had welcomed the advances and encouraged the sex.

Now, Steve was still a mess and feeling very much ashamed for leaving Bucky in such a flurry. He owed it to his best friend to explain his thoughts on the situation and rectify things between them before it got out of hand.

Although he knew it was both of them that consented to have sex, Steve still felt ashamed because he had initiated the physical contact.

He needed to make things right again between Bucky and him while also smoothing things over with Sharon to explain what had happened.

He couldn’t lose his best friend…or his fiancé.

*

_Then_

“ _Fuck_.” Steve gasped as his best friend began to trail kisses down his neck to his bonding glands. Bucky sucked and massaged his tongue over the sensitive base of the alpha’s neck, eliciting deep moans from the bigger man as Steve’s musky scent bloomed amidst the toe-curling attention. Bucky groaned as his right hand fumbled with the blonde’s belt. Once loosened, his nimble fingers began to unbutton and pull the zipper down of Steve’s jeans.

Steve stilled Bucky’s hand and the omega looked up to him questioningly, his eyes half-lidded from their mixed scents of arousal and want. It was completely intoxicating in Bucky’s room where they had wandered after leaving a clothing trail from the TV room to the omega’s bed. They stood and faced each other on the precipice of self-control before they went through with the one act that could change their friendship forever.

“Are you sure you want this, Buck?”

The omega looked up the alpha and wondered if he was second guessing their situation. He prayed that the alpha wasn’t changing his mind, but he would always respect Steve’s choice. He tried to get a handle on his fuzzy thoughts and cursed the alcohol he had consumed and the alpha’s enticing scent which was encouraging him to continue the seduction. He also was coming down from a particularly rough heat, and having the sudden presence of a virile alpha made all of his turn-ons go haywire.

“I’m definitely all in.” The brunette confessed as his right hand trailed down Steve’s abs to ghost over the impressive erection that was straining in Steve’s boxer briefs.

The alpha’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as he let out a shuddering groan. He knew that he was now technically separated from Sharon, but he still felt the slight tendrils of guilt for moving on so fast with the anxious omega. Still, if there was anyone that he could trust, it would be Bucky. He wanted this, _craved_ this so much that it surprised him the level of desire that had spiked between them.

He wondered why they had never done this before and then remembered; one or the other was either in a relationship, unavailable, or the timing never worked in their favor.

And then there was college, Bucky’s deployment, Sharon, Bucky’s accident and sudden return _home_ , the proposal, and Bucky’s therapy…

Now, though…

“You’re 100%?” he echoed with a thrilled feeling that left him airy and giddy.

“I used to imagine you stuffing your cock in me when I’d jack-off.” Bucky panted as he pressed his forehead against Steve’s chiseled chest. “Definitely want your knot in me.”

“Yes.” Steve panted at the filthy image which did nothing but help all the blood in his system to pool to his groin, leaving the rest of his body in an all-over shudder as Bucky groped at his dick and rubbed slowly to encourage more moans from the alpha.

The brunette grinned, “Let’s see that beautiful blush, Stevie.”

The omega made good on his word and encouraged the alpha to strip completely Steve’s body was an immaculate work of art. Despite his days rattled by sickness as a child, puberty had done him a plethora of favors by the time he hit high school. The blonde was all defined muscles and milky-white skin that blushed a most beautiful pink with his arousal.

Bucky was all in as the two took their physical affections to the next level. They didn’t talk about any of the implications their hook-up could entail. The brunette never mentioned his boyfriend, and Steve never mentioned his fiancé.  They were both sub-consciously aware that what they were doing was cheating, but it didn’t matter in the face of everything that had gone on in the past few days.

Having sex with Steve Rogers was everything Bucky had ever fantasized about and more. Steve was a generous and attentive lover; he caressed and paid homage to every part of Bucky’s body with strong hands, deft fingers, and a talented tongue. The omega responded in kind, giving everything he could to the taller man as he rode his thick alpha cock expertly.

They had no room to talk as their bodies melded and gave way to urges and desires that neither the brunette nor the blonde could put in words. There was an underlying intensity beneath the sweatiness of their warm skin that spoke volumes of their connection.

All Bucky could think of was how _right_ it felt to have Steve between his thick muscular thighs.

When the younger man panted and sat up, gripping tightly to Bucky’s hips with an urgent look in his eyes that asked for permission to cum; the omega wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck, leaning in to bite his earlobe and whisper huskily.

_“Knot me, Stevie. Make me cum for you.”_

The alpha had positioned Bucky around on to his back, welcomed between his legs as he brought on a satisfyingly brutal pace, kissing and sucking at Bucky’s lips and neck while the omega’s hand scratched down his back, the other arm wrapped around his shoulder to keep him close. Bucky came before Steve, over-sensitive and basking in the attention while the alpha jacked him off in tandem with his deep thrusts.

Steve followed soon after, encouraged by the flex and pull of the brunette’s orgasm. His knot came easily and as they tied together, he brought himself down to his forearms, careful not to overwhelm the exhausted omega with his bulk. He kissed him and ran a hand through the other’s brunette chin-length locks through their orgasmic haze.

The comfort and peace of being tied together was only moonlighted by the fact that they were overwhelmed by hormones, pheromones, and the slight addition of alcohol.

For at least one night, they could have each other without the thought of reality hovering on their shoulders.

*

_Now_

Bucky Barnes was by no means a romantic waif-like omega who stood on the balcony waiting for true love’s first kiss. He was a man that had seen war; a man that had experienced some of the roughest experiences life could throw at an individual and still come out mostly on top. Throughout life, Bucky had fought for the things he wanted and cherished; starting with sticking up for his friends all the way to serving in the military. He was often times described as loyal and honest, but as last night unfolded…

Bucky felt his friends needed to re-evaluate their ideas. He wasn’t perfect, and he had consciously slept with an engaged man while he himself had a boyfriend.

It had been a huge step for him to accept Steve’s feelings and bring the alpha into his bed where Steve had fucked him long, thoroughly, and deliriously good. Bucky knew it was about time; had craved this moment for all of his life since he realized he was in love with Steve (at the same time Steve realized he was in love with Sharon). Pining for someone else who was in a relationship was never something Bucky would be proud of, but he couldn’t stop his heart from bleeding and loving the blonde alpha. Even when Bucky had been deployed overseas and served three tours in special ops, and even after the accident and his return home; he always loved Steve.

It was why waking up alone in his bed with only hickies and an ache between his legs to affirm that anyone had been there was kind of a huge let down.

He woke up in slow stages of awareness. First, he stretched and twitched with the pain in his left arm while he tossed and turned to get comfortable. When his eyes opened, he looked to both sides of the bed, feeling for a larger warm body.

The bed was cold.

He struggled out of the mess and smell of alpha sex in his sheets, trying to find his balance as he looked around his grey-walled room and noticed Steve’s clothing gone as well. His stomach filled with coiling dread as he pulled on a pair of boxers one-handed and stood up, still delightfully sore from where Steve had knotted him the night before.

Making a quick sweep of his room produced no note.

Checking his phone; no voicemails or texts.

He made his way out to the main room and looked around, finding again no Steve.

Bucky wasn’t unaccustomed to the nagging feeling of being a one-time fling; his string of dating knot-headed assholes in his youth had provided a deeper understanding of this cycle and his long standing relationship with Brock Rumlow did nothing to improve on that. However, he thought he could expect a little more from his best friend, even if it was a one-night stand. He worried why Steve wouldn’t wake him up before he left.

He began to worry that Steve had not been happy when he left the apartment. He worried that his best friend was sorely regretting what they had done and would push him away. He wanted more than anything for Steve and him to be okay, but first he needed to take a deep breath and gather his own thoughts and feelings.

He knew Steve would never just purposely leave him as if he was a disposable one night stand: it wasn’t in Steve’s nature. There had to be a clear explanation and the omega wasn’t about to over-analyze so early in the morning.

Not one to beat around the bush, he called Steve and left him a voicemail.

_“Hey Steve, just calling to see how you’re doing. Maybe we can grab a bite to eat later and talk about what happened? Text me, punk.”_

He hung up with a nagging feeling of rejection and disappointment over the whole ordeal.  Typically he could roll with a one night stand, but the fact that it was _Steve_ made everything feel all the more personal. He rubbed at his left arm and tried to regain some feeling in the damaged mottled skin that made his arm more of a nuisance in the morning after he’d slept on it. He wished the doctors would’ve removed more of the limb, but he had been doing well with physical therapy and wasn’t over eager to put himself through another surgery.

From mid-forearm and down, he was missing his left hand and half of his forearm. There had been an ambush while on patrol through the town during his third tour. He was supposed to have been the eyes in the operation and with one stupid slip up-

The omega closed his eyes tightly, standing in the middle of the room as he tried to recite the meditative words to bring him back to the present. He didn’t want to dissociate so early in the morning and have the rest of his day ruined from an episode because he was frantic over something that would probably be resolved in a few hours.

He took in a deep breath and released it slowly, trying to let go of the confusion, anger, and paranoia. As his nerves began to settle, he heard the familiar beep of his cell phone. He picked it up and let out a sigh of relief as Steve’s name flashed on the screen.

 **Stevie** : I’m so sorry I had to get going this morning! I have a deadline due, but I would like to see you early tomorrow and talk about last night. Is brunch ok?

Bucky let out another sigh of relief, feeling that perhaps he had been a little too paranoid and jumped the gun in assuming Steve would leave him alone maliciously. Steve worked as an illustrator, so he could understand the deadlines and amount of time the alpha dedicated to being a workaholic. Steve worked crazy hours, even on a Sunday and it was common knowledge that Steve’s deadlines were typically on Monday mornings. Bucky hoped that was truly the case and nothing was out of the ordinary.

 **Buck** : Yeah, that sounds good. :)

 **Stevie:** Meet at the diner?

 **Buck** : Yep. See you ‘round 11 tomorrow?

 **Stevie:** Rodger that. :]

The brunette set down his phone and felt slightly more relieved over the situation. He had a thrumming headache in the base of his skull from the amount of liquor he and Steve had consumed the evening before, but it was made more bearable knowing that the alpha hadn’t left in a commotion of regret over their coupling.

He hoped that they would be okay.

As he stood at the kitchen counter and waiting for the pot of coffee to finish filtering, the omega couldn’t push away the image of Steve above him, holding him and making love to him like he was something treasured and precious despite all of the horrors he had committed and been through. Even though they had been slightly drunk and in the heat of the moment, Bucky couldn’t tune out the words Steve had gasped as he knotted him and pressed his mouth to his bonding gland in an affectionate gesture.  

_I love you._

*

Nat emerged from her and Clint’s bedroom an hour later, managing to look immaculately polished in her trim workout gear. The night before, she and Clint had been out at a concert and bar hopping. Bucky had heard them come home sometime around 3am, which at that point he was in a delirious post-sex haze behind his bedroom doors wrapped around Steve.

Natasha worked for the government. That was where her description of her work skills typically ended as the rest was ‘classified’, though Bucky was privileged to know she worked in Special Forces and often times went undercover on assignments for weeks. She was a remarkable woman and one whom Bucky admired greatly, not only because she was amazing but also because she was one of his best friends.

Bucky was on the couch in his sweatpants, binge-watching _Arrested Development_ and trying not to look guilty over the fact that the whole apartment probably reeked of sex when his roommates went through the door. After he had made coffee and ate a protein bar, he had lit a eucalyptus candle and opened a few windows to neutralize the scents.

“Why did I smell Steve and sex pheromones last night?” Nat was straight to the point as she moved to stand in front of Bucky, blocking his view with her hands on her hips and a perfectly arched brow. There was a hint of an amused smirk playing at the corner of her lips.

_Fuck._

The omega groaned at the red-headed alpha’s tactics, “I may have done something a little wrong.”

Natasha continued to stare, unwavering as she peered into his eyes. “James Buchannan Barnes, please tell me you did not fuck your best friend, who is an engaged man set to be married in a wedding that you are presiding in as the best man.”

Bucky sunk into the couch cushions. One look was enough as he bit his lip. “I’m not proud of what we did and I don’t regret it.”

Nat took in a deep inhale, closing her eyes as she leveled her thoughts to compose her annoyance towards James. There were a string of curse words under her breath in Russian as she came to sit next to the omega.

 “This isn’t my proudest moment.” Bucky confessed, “We were together and it sort of just…happened. A little bit of alcohol was involved, but we weren’t plastered and it was Steve who initiated everything. We both consented and from there, we just…” he waved his hand in front of him, “yeah…”

“Steve initiated it??”

“He and Sharon got into a nasty fight-“

“-I know.” Nat sighed. Bucky had to pause and remember that Nat always knew everything that was going on in their friend group. She was especially perceptive and had sources.

He continued, “We’re meeting up tomorrow to talk about things.”

Nat looked to him seriously, turning her smaller framed (but no less muscular) body towards his, “What do you want to happen now that you’ve both gotten to this point?”

The thing was, Bucky wasn’t sure.

Objectively speaking, Bucky thought it would be nice to have sex again with Steve. In fact, regular sex with the blonde would be ideal.

However, he knew he had to be realistic. Steve was an engaged man and although things with him and Sharon were never exactly smooth sailing, it was a lot to call off a wedding. For Bucky, he was technically with Brock and had a pretty decent relationship. Brock wasn’t perfect, but he had been there for Bucky on an intimate level throughout physical therapy and his assimilation back to civilian life.

Things were bound to get messy either way.

“I need to talk to him first. I’m not sure what I want, or what is going to happen from here on out.” His brows furrowed as the multiple possibilities played in his head.

Nat exhaled and stood up to hold her hand out to him, “How about you work off some steam and get your head sorted?”

The omega groaned, even though he still wiggled to sit up, “But I already had a _thorough_ workout last night, Natalia.”

She snorted, “Not as thorough as I’m going to be with your thighs and calves on leg day today. Go get changed, James.”

The omega cursed, but went willingly.

He needed to get his mind away from everything.

*

_Monday_

Steve and Bucky met at the usual diner that they had been going to since they were awkward pre-teens navigating through middle school. This was a safe zone for them whenever they wanted to catch up, vent frustrations, or even enjoy a meal in comfortable silence. Today though, the topic of their conversation came up right after the first cups of coffee had been delivered.

“So…about the other night.” Steve scratched the back of his neck, blushing.

Bucky smirked and glanced towards the table, feeling all kinds of smitten. Sure, the morning after had been awkward and difficult, but the night of their coupling had been one of the best nights of his life. He had a hard time looking at Steve’s face and not remembering the blonde’s o-face or the sinful things he could do with his tongue and lips in interesting places.

“Yeah?” Bucky prompted with a lift of the brow, amused by the blush on the alpha’s cheeks. Bucky was now intimately aware of just how far down that blush could go.

Steve coughed, uncomfortable in his seat across from the omega. His brows scrunched, “Look, Buck…”

And then the warning bells went off in Bucky’s head.

“-it was a good night. Amazing, even, and I’m glad we were able to share what we did with one another... But I’m still engaged to Sharon and what we did probably wasn’t a good idea in light of everything. It wasn’t the right time to do what we did, but I want to clear things between us and talk about it.”

Bucky felt the background buzzing in his head as he slowly lifted his eyes to meet Steve’s pained stare. The alpha continued. “I’m sorry, Buck. I should’ve been more responsible and I feel like I took advantage of you and the situation. I mean, I should’ve had more respect for your relationship with Brock and I was completely irresponsible-“

Bucky held up his right hand, “Woah, slow down. You definitely didn’t take advantage of me. Do you regret what we did?”

Steve’s face fell, “No, god no, Buck. I don’t regret it, but under the circumstances…it wasn’t a smart move for the situation. I was hoping that we could possibly…move on from what happened.”

“Move on?” Bucky may have had a cool composure, but his insides were clenching and feeling all kinds of hollow and wrong. He knew it wasn’t rational for him to begin experiencing these emotions as he had talked to Nat about the likely possibility of their hook up being just that; a onetime thing.

Steve ran his hand over his face, “I’m still engaged to Sharon.”

Bucky took in a deep breath “You’re not going to break it off, are you?”

One look had Bucky realizing that was the case. The blonde looked miserable and helpless, and his look of hopelessness had Bucky remembering that Steve had never expressed wanting to ‘break up’ with Sharon completely. They had only been in a _fight_.

The omega then realized that talking about this in public, in a place that was typically regarded as a ‘sanctuary’ between them was perhaps not the right move.

Suddenly, his coffee soured in his stomach.

“So what we did..?”

Steve looked even more pained, “I care about you, Buck, and you know I do. But I love Sharon and I’ve made a promise to her. And you have Brock. We both cheated and I’ve already told Sharon and she’s livid, but she wants to work on things between us. I just…I want to make things right. I don’t want what we did to hurt our friendship. If things were any different, then this wouldn’t be a problem. There’s no one else I would rather have sex with since you’re someone I trust and care about deeply. But Sharon…we’ve been together for years and we’re getting married in a few months. I owe it to her to try and work on our relationship before I make any further decisions.”

If Bucky could flip a table and throw a middle finger to the universe, he would’ve. However, he had learned to hold in many of his emotions and he could school his face through this awkward encounter. He was upset that he was right; that Steve would go back to Sharon, as he always did. He was also upset with himself for being selfish and secretly hoping things between him and Steve could possibly move past a friendship into something more. 

He masked his face to seem calm and collected. “It’s fine, Steve. I get it. You deserve a second chance with Sharon and I’m sorry I wasn’t thinking more clearly before we hooked up.”

“Not like this.” Steve frowned, “You’re my best friend; my best _man_. I want to work through this and get us to a good place again.”

Bucky took in a deep breath, getting a handle on his nerves. “We’re okay. It’s not a big deal; we had sex and trust me, it wasn’t just your idea. It was great, but now…we’re back to where we were. Pretend it didn’t happen?”

Steve didn’t look happy with the blunt words, but he nodded, “If that’s what you want, we can pretend it didn’t happen…”

“Okay. We move on.” Bucky began to fumble with getting his jacket back on. He lifted himself out of the booth as his skin began to feel clammy from nerves. “I’m going to go because this was- this wasn’t how-“ Bucky shook his head and began to leave.

Steve cursed and threw down a couple of dollars as quick as he could, scurrying out of the booth to chase after his friend. Bucky was almost halfway down the block when Steve caught up to him.

“Bucky! Bucky, please wait!” he yelled.

The omega turned towards him, now looking annoyed in order to mask the deep hurt. He knew he shouldn’t have expected things to go differently, but he was frustrated despite knowing it wasn’t rational of him. He knew he acting out of sorts, but he couldn’t control his emotions 24/7.

Steve was in distress as well, “I can’t lose you, Buck. Please- please forgive me for being an ass and taking advantage of you.” There was a shakiness to his voice that rarely came to be unless he was truly upset.

“You didn’t take advantage of me! In fact, you were drunker than I was and I’m afraid I took advantage of _you_. I knew you were engaged and I knew you would probably go back to Sharon, but I still made things more difficult between us.” Bucky explained.

“You didn’t take advantage of me. Can you tell me why you just left? I want to talk this through with you and its obvious we’re not in a good place right now. You’re upset, I’m upset-”

“Because I need some time, Steve. I need to get my head on straight.” Bucky sighed and gestured with his hand between them, “Please give me a little space?  I promise we’ll be okay, but I need to think and process some things first. I think everything is too raw right now with what we did and my hormones are still a mess from my last heat.”

Steve understood, and he nodded, biting his lower lip. He knew when he was being defeated by Bucky’s own stubbornness. “Okay. But if you need me or want to talk, let me know? Please don’t alienate yourself. Call me anytime you need. I’m going to be checking in on you, Buck. This isn’t the last of this conversation.”

Bucky sighed, nodding. He reached in and pulled the alpha into a hug, but it was brief as he really didn’t want to make a bigger scene in public with their dramatic scents. Steve asked him again if he wanted to talk more or if he wanted him to come over, but the omega refused and left the alpha to respect his choice.

He knew he shouldn’t feel so upset. After all, it was Steve who had made the first move to come onto him. He had initiated the first kiss to the lips and the first tentative touch to his chest, luring the omega in and putting his heart and soul on his sleeve. He should’ve been a better friend and recognized that Steve’s lapse in judgment due to his distress and alcohol were not a clear and explicit invitation to have sex.

Nonetheless, Steve had consented at the time and they went through with it.

The omega walked down the streets of Brooklyn, knowing fully well that his emotions were to haywire to allow him to sort through his thoughts rationally. As soon as Bucky got home, his reserve broke and he did the one thing he always did when he was in distress and in need of a reliable release.

He called Brock.

*

Technically, Brock and Bucky were on a break, but the younger omega always kept his boyfriend on speed dial for situations just like this.

He went straight to Brock’s door, used the spare key, and entered without as much of a knock. He found the alpha doing sit-ups in the living room, grunting with sweat as he completed his morning workout.

Where Steve had pure milky-white skin unmarred with any imperfections, Rumlow was tanned and scar-stricken. He had served for years in the military before completing his service and moving to special ops in the NYPD. He was rugged and rough in a way that usually excited the omega’s body.

“Hey sweetheart, what’s got you all rattled?” Brock asked in between breaths as he continued his sit-ups.

Bucky took off his jacket, dropping it over the back of the couch. He toed off his shoes and entered the living room. He didn’t need an invitation as he came around to Brock and straddled the man’s hips, sitting on top of him. Brock chuckled, sitting up all the way as he pulled the omega close to him and mouthed at his neck.

“Had a shit morning. Make it good for me?” Bucky lowered his voice, leaning in to kiss the top of Brock’s sweat soaked hair.

“I’ll take your mind off things, baby doll.” The older man cooed, his hand snaking underneath the omega’s shirt.

Bucky closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift away.

*

For Steve, telling his fiancé that he had slept with someone else was the easier part.

Telling her that someone was Bucky Barnes…well, that became a little trickier.

Sharon had sat across from Steve, her tea in her hand and raised to her lips when Steve had looked to her and explained what had happened between he and Bucky. He admitted that he had harbored some desire for Bucky over the years, and that with the adrenaline from their argument and the inviting scent of his best friend, he had screwed up and reeled Bucky into their mess of things.

Steve never explicitly stated that he regretted what he did with Bucky, but he admitted openly that he was not proud of himself for disrespecting Sharon and his best friend in the process because he couldn’t contain his self-control and process his emotions and urges in a healthier manner. He wanted to take the blame 100%, but Sharon knew better.

She knew the way Bucky looked at Steve. She had known since the beginning of her relationship with the blonde alpha.

After Steve explained the situation and how he had spoken with Bucky and wanted to make everything right again, wanted to atone for what he had done, and to work on his relationship with Sharon…the blonde omega quietly stood from the table and walked towards the kitchen.

She took a deep breath, but her anger manifested as she chucked the mug into the kitchen sink, shattering it. She took in another calming breath and turned to her fiancé.

“We’re getting married in a few months, Steve.” Sharon leaned back against the counter, “And our engagement party is in a few weeks. I don’t know how to feel knowing you’ve had sex with Bucky while he stands next to you as your best man.”

Steve’s face fell.

Sharon continued, “I love you, but I’m really, really disgusted with you right now. I’m going to go to the gun range, process my feelings, and get back to you on my thoughts after I’ve decided whether or not I still want to marry you.”

Steve knew better than to argue due to the fact that he was in the wrong. He wasn’t about to stop Sharon in any way, as she was completely justified to be upset with him. He nodded, respecting her wishes with a grim face as she walked past him to pick up her purse.

She left Steve’s apartment without another word except for the slam of the front door, rattling the artwork hanging in the home.

*

Six hours later and too many bullets fired to count, Sharon texted her fiancé.

 **Sharon** : _I’m still in if you are, but we’re going to a relationship counsellor._

Steve agreed.

*

_ Seven weeks after the ‘night’ _

Bucky missed his scheduled heat for a week and thought nothing of it. Sometimes his cycles could be a little unbalanced, especially after he had come home from the war and began adjusting to a civilian lifestyle without the heavy dosage of suppressants. He was on a lower dose birth control now which allowed him to have more manageable heats every eight. It was also a more friendly dosage of hormones to keep his body in check and not mask his scent glands, as they had been damaged enough from the war and his injuries.

What did concern the brunette was that he had been throwing up every morning for the past 3 days while also feeling a general sense of queasy unease in his stomach.

After a week and a half and no heat, the omega began squinting at his calendar in annoyed suspicion.

By the end of two weeks and no heat, he knew something was up. He rolled out of bed early Saturday morning and stumbled to pick up his clothing while dealing with the roiling of his stomach. He almost felt like he was seasick as the room seemed to rock. Brock was still snoring amidst the tangled sheets without a care in the world and completely oblivious to Bucky’s scent. The omega glared down at him as he thought of their conversation the night before while they laid in bed naked and panting.

-

 _Then (last night)_ :

“I’m almost two weeks late.”

Brock was on his back, breathing heavily as he ran his hand over his chest to feel his heartbeat. They had just finished a round of especially rough sex that left angry marks along the alpha’s chest and back. He got off on the pain, and Bucky was more than happy to channel any of his frustrations into some bruising and gashes.  

“Two weeks? Are you sure?” the bigger alpha glanced down to his sweat-drenched boyfriend with mild skepticism.

Bucky ran his hand through his dampened locks of hair. “I’m not so sure this is a false alarm this time. I’ve been getting sick and light headed throughout the day.”

The alpha turned to his side and propped his head up with a bent elbow. His brow creased in worry. “Are you sure it’s not the PTSD?”

“Definitely sure. I’m not dissociating or anything. I ate a milkshake the other day and barfed my brains out. You know I love milkshakes.” Bucky closed his eyes. “What if I am pregnant?”

Brock thought carefully for a few moments before he spoke, “Then we handle it. Or you handle it. I’m not opposed to you having my pups, but if you ain’t ready, then you can take care of it how you see fit.”

It wasn’t exactly the answer Bucky was hoping or wanting to hear, but Brock wasn’t exactly a model boyfriend either. The two of them had been together for over two years in an on-again, off-again relationship that could be passionate and all-consuming at one moment, and then feel too casual like a friendship the next.

Brock was also a veteran and three years older than the omega. They had met at the local VFW and Brock had initially been his sponsor as he adjusted to civilian life. From then on, they became more. He worked for the NYPD and his schedule was sometimes a hectic affair. Brock wasn’t a terrible boyfriend, but he wasn’t great either. He was prone to fits of rage and had broken some walls and furniture in the expanse of their time together. When they fought, it was as wild and vicious as being on the battlefield. However, the man had a kind side to him that many were rarely able to see. He could be patient and supportive with Bucky when the omega was going through rough times or needed a rock to steady himself on. They both had shared experiences and for that, Bucky stayed.

Bucky cared for the guy on a level where they understood each other. Brock needed physical outlets for his anger and grief, whereas Bucky needed the solace and sometimes sexual gratification to let off his steam.

“If you’re really, truly knocked up, will this finally convince you to move in with me? Almost half of your shit is already here anyways.” Brock ran his hand up to flick at one of the omega’s sensitive nipples. “Or do I gotta put a ring on it, doll?”

Bucky snorted and waved him off. He considered the proposal and knew that if he asked him, Brock would gladly tie him down with a ring and give him a proper mating bite. There was truly nothing to hold him back except for the fact that he was hesitant.

And that was enough.

“I’m probably just late.”

“Mmm, now you’re just saying that because you don’t want to sound paranoid.” Brock leaned in and mouthed along the omega’s neck where his scent was strong with satisfied pleasure. “If you are knocked up and you want to keep it, I’m in, baby. I would love to fuck you while you’re barefoot, pregnant, and in my kitchen.”

Bucky groaned, “You’re such an ass.”

“I’m your ass.” Brock ran his hand down and grabbed a handful of the omega’s toned buttocks. “And this ass is what keeps me coming back. So good to me, baby doll. Wanna eat you out all night. Gets me hard thinking of you full with my kid.”

The omega couldn’t help but to laugh at the absurdity of Brock’s words. As the dark haired alpha began to kiss down his neck to explore more interesting regions, the omega began to wonder another chilling thought…if he was pregnant, there could be a good chance that it might be Steve’s instead.

When Brock reached his destination, the brunette closed his eyes and tried to will away any tumultuous thoughts of who the sire was. For now, he could bask in the attention.

*

_Now_

 He was on the phone with Natasha as soon as he was out of the elevator and leaving Brock’s apartment building.

“So my heat is two weeks late.” Bucky greeted after she had answered with a disgruntled _what_.

Upon hearing the news, it seemed to awaken her a bit more. “Your heat is late?”

“Yep. I’m sure it’s just my cycle getting messed up again, but…I’m also a little freaked out that it’s not.” There was a slight shake to the omega’s voice that Nat detected immediately.

“How are you feeling?” She asked as she began to get out of bed. Clint groaned next to her for her to get back into the cozy sheets, but she was already halfway dressed as she stood and slipped on a pair of sweatpants. “Where are you? Are you walking home from Brock’s? You’re not home, of course.”

“Feel like shit. I’m at the convenience store. I’ll be home in 10 minutes.” He ran his hand down his face as he looked over the medication and hygiene products.

“I’ll be waiting.”

“Thanks, Nat.”

He hung up and let out a frustrated sigh as he reached forward and grabbed three different types of pregnancy tests. This wasn’t his first scare, and he knew it wouldn’t be his last. Having an irregular cycle meant that he was an especially anxious worrier, even though he used condoms and contraception. Even with his longstanding boyfriend, Brock, they typically always used condoms as it made the clean-up easier. However, he typically had about two pregnancy scares a year though they always came back negative. The doctors had said that they wouldn’t know the full extent of his fertility issues until the omega wanted to actively try getting pregnant, so he was never sure if he even had a solid foundation to be worried.

Nonetheless, he was worrying.

He bought the pregnancy tests with a bag of licorice, a pack of minty gum, and some Doritos. The cashier didn’t even blink at the combination of items as he rung up the omega and let him on his way. Bucky ate the Doritos for breakfast on his way home and met Nat at the front door of their apartment where she was waiting with crossed arms.

“Doritos? _Really_? It’s 7am, James.”

He shrugged, “I’m an adult.”

The red head rolled her eyes and backed away to allow him entry. Bucky had first moved in with Natasha and Clint over two years ago when living by himself proved to make his dissociation worse. Clint and Natasha had been dating for forever and Bucky had been best friends with them since high school. He wiggled the bag in front of him where the alpha begrudgingly stole one of the chips and popped it in her mouth.

“So how many tests did you buy this time?”

“The usual 3. I figure this will calm my nerves.” Bucky sighed, though he honestly was more nervous about this try than he ever had been before. He began walking towards the restroom with a nervous stomach.

Natasha trailed after him, “Do you even have enough urine to supply three pregnancy tests?”

“I’ve been holding it since my walk over, so we’ll find out.”

The alpha leaned back against the wall outside of the bathroom while she waited for Bucky to finish up in the bathroom. He took a while to open up the tests and use them. By the time he was finished, he laid them out on the counter in a row and sat down on the edge of the closed toilet seat.

“You’re going to Clorox that table counter when we’re done here, right?” she yawned while she ran her fingers through her bedhead.

Bucky snorted and shook his head, his bare foot tapping on the floor while they waited. He stared at the timer on his phone in-between browsing through his social media. When the alarm went off, he got up to check.

“Shit.” Natasha breathed in, as she had already had a good look.

Bucky paled as he looked at the row of three positive pregnancy tests and felt like the world was crumbling at the bottom of his feet.

“Maybe they’re false positive?” he echoed, voice shaking from the terror that crawled up his throat. He rarely found himself completely speechless, but this was it.  

“James, that’s _three_ positive tests from three different brands.” Natasha was looking over the box instructions and confirming the results.

Bucky felt his stomach churn and had barely 5 seconds before he was lifting up the toilet seat and vomiting. 

By this point, the commotion brought Clint out to the doorway of the bathroom.

“You okay?” the beta asked. He didn’t need an answer though as his eyes honed in on the pregnancy tests. “Please tell me this is another false alarm.”

Natasha looked to her mate grimly. “We have three positives.”

“Oh, fuck.”

The omega quivered as he stood up and walked to the sink to gargle and rinse his mouth out with mouth wash. He leaned his hands against the sink and closed his eyes to try and level his thoughts. “I’m going to the omega clinic this afternoon. Get this sorted.”

“Sorted as in…?”

“Figure out the due date.” Bucky wiped at his mouth.  He let out a sigh and looked resolutely at the white porcelain that he had come to know so well over the past few days from morning sickness. “And…I’ll need to figure out who the dad is.”

Clint held up his hands, “Woah, as in..?”

“Steve could very likely be the father if the due date matches up.” Bucky explained as he glanced up to his two lifelong friends. “And if he is, then I have a lot of explaining to do.”

Natasha couldn’t help but to smirk at the ridiculousness of the whole situation. “Trouble just loves finding you James, doesn’t it?”

The omega closed his eyes, groaning as he shook his head, “I promise that this was not my desired outcome.”

“Well it’s more than likely Rumlow’s. I mean, a one night stand with Steve can’t negate the fact that it could more than likely be Brock’s as the two of you bone pretty-“ Clint coughed, “- _regularly_.”

 “I try to be quiet.” Bucky grumbled in defense.

“You’re terribly loud, James. It’s true.” Natasha said pointedly. “And either way, Steve used a condom. I’m guessing that you and Brock are not always as careful.”

The omega blushed harder and looked up to the ceiling. Nat caught on immediately and her eyes narrowed.

“You _did_ use protection with Steve, right?” she growled.

“We uh…may have gotten a little out of hand during the first round.” The brunette fumbled, feeling embarrassed that he had forgone the number one rule to safe sex.

Clint started to laugh uncontrollably as he pulled the omega into a side hug. “Aww, Bucky! You adorable idiot!”

Bucky bit his lip, “We were a little overly involved in the proceedings and I admit I was careless.”

Natasha shook her head, “Why is it always you, Barnes?”

The omega was beginning to wonder the same thing.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve wanted to write a fic like this for a while so I finally gave in.  
> To clarify, both Steve and Bucky are in outside relationships. Steve is engaged to Sharon and Bucky is in an on again/off again relationship with Brock (they’re both hotheads). Sorry if some of this seems ooc, I promise to get more into their heads in the next chapter as drama ensues. Steve and Bucky will talk things out more in the next chapter, plus the engagement party will commence.  
> I had no beta reader for this, so any errors are my own!  
> I hope you enjoyed! Thank you for reading. :)  
> [My tumblr](http://valkyriegail76.tumblr.com/)  
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/AmethystValkyri)  
> 


	2. Longing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the face of Sharon’s parents and all the people who had turned out to show the couple their love and support, Bucky couldn’t shake the feeling of being a homewrecker with a scarlet letter pinned to his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: Please mind the angst tags! Warnings for some physical non-con elements and uncomfortably awkward situations in this chapter. I’m sorry. (All mistakes are my own. This is un-betaed)

Even with three positive pregnancy tests, Bucky did his best to ignore the possibilities as to not work himself up. He schooled his emotions and went about his morning routine; showering after he shooed his roommates away so he could brush his teeth and straighten himself out while gathering his strength. He had time to get himself sorted until he needed to attend his scheduled appointment in the early afternoon at the Omega Clinic. He had called in sick from his work at Stark Industries, telling the human resources coordinator, Darcy, that he needed to take a personal day.

“Oh c’mon, are you seriously about to play hooky without me?” Darcy joked over the line.

Bucky grinned, feeling oddly reassured by her usual snark. “I wish. I’m going to the doctor today, so I’ll fill you in tomorrow once I get things sorted.”

He felt bad for not telling her the whole truth, but people generally didn’t ask questions when they would eye the stub of his left arm and leave it at that, feeling too uncomfortable to voice their curiosity on how Bucky lost some of his limb. He usually told people it was from a car accident to save the pitying looks. Telling people he was a veteran and had been a POW typically elicited more attention than he was comfortable with.

“Sure thing. We’re still on for paninis tomorrow though, right?”

“Yeah, of course. Tell the boss man I’ll still have those drafts for him tomorrow, too.”

“Can do. See ya tomorrow, Barnes!”

Bucky rested his head back against his bed, staring up at his ceiling and wondering how this was his life.

All things considered, he felt distanced from the fact that he was pregnant. He wasn’t sure if it was denial exactly, but he wanted to get a doctor’s assurance before he allowed himself to freak out properly. Clint and Nat were hovering in a way that suggested they were waiting for the inevitable break down. Bucky couldn’t be annoyed with them as he knew they were coming from a place of love and concern, but Clint could only saunter by his door so many times.

As his appointment neared, he began to imagine how he would break the news to his boyfriend. Brock would probably be excited, as confirmed the night before when he shared his desire to fuck him in the kitchen. Brock had always mentioned that he wouldn’t mind being a father one day, and although he had never outwardly pressured Bucky to get married and have kids, it was heavily implied from the times they knowingly skipped out on condoms when there was a possibility the omega could conceive. Part of it was getting caught in the heat of the moment, while another part of it was Bucky morbidly wondering if he even could get pregnant after everything his body has been through.

Having Brock’s child wouldn’t be a bad thing in Bucky’s mind and his fate seemed to hang in the balance as he thought of marrying the older alpha, moving in with him, and raising a kid together. Bucky wasn’t baby obsessed, but he enjoyed the closeness of family and had grown up with three younger sisters whom he all cared for protectively. Having his own family one day was a desire that crossed Bucky’s mind from time to time. It became even more so when his younger twin sister Becca had her first son three years ago.

Being a father didn’t scare Bucky. What scared him was the very real possibility that he could be carrying Steve’s child instead of Rumlow’s. Knowing that Steve and Sharon were still engaged and actively working through their issues didn’t qualm the omega’s fears that if he did indeed have Steve’s pup growing inside him, he may be doing this whole pregnancy thing alone. He couldn’t begin to imagine how Brock would react if he knew Steve Rogers had knotted his boyfriend and knocked him up.

Brock and Steve didn’t exactly see eye-to-eye. They got along when they needed to, though it reminded Bucky more of two annoyed tom-cats tolerating one another, while also waiting for the other to make the first move so they could have an excuse to fight. In the past, they had been in their own fair share of verbal arguments which were usually only tampered down because Bucky got in-between them. If he was indeed carrying Steve’s pup, he highly doubted Brock would stick around.

Thinking of possibly doing this alone began to make him feel sick.

He couldn’t lie to Brock and he couldn’t live with himself to not tell Steve.

Besides, what if the kid came out with tufts of blonde hair? Brock wasn’t an idiot; and neither was Bucky’s best friend.

“Stop moping and let’s get this show on the road!” Natasha called from the kitchen, breaking him from his reverie.

Bucky groaned loudly, running his right hand down his face. He shuffled off of his bed and toed on his sneakers. By the time he was out of the bedroom door, Nat was pressing toast with peanut butter in his mouth and forcing him to at least eat something relatively healthy. She handed him a to-go mug of hot ginger tea to go with it.

“You need to keep your strength up.” Nat encouraged, looking remarkably calm for someone who just found out their best friend was pregnant. “We’re both coming with you, by the way.”

“We figure we can go to your favorite Deli afterwards.” Clint added as he pulled on his jacket.

Natasha helped Bucky to put on the black sleeve to his left arm which helped to cover the scarring flesh of the base of the nub. Bucky then put on his flannel and allowed Nat to pin up the left sleeve to the mid-forearm as well, keeping his injury warm and out of sight. (Though missing a hand was still quite noticeable without his jacket)

When all three were ready, they ventured out into the crisp early November air, which did nothing to calm their nerves.

*

If Bucky could never walk into a doctor’s office again for the rest of his life, he would be very much at peace. However, the only small miracle in this situation was that he wasn’t getting his arm or his brain examined on, and he had the support of two of his closest friends. The clinic receptionist eyed Natasha carefully as she was an alpha in the middle of an omega clinic, but the redhead was quick to pull down her scarf to show the evident mating bite on her lower neck where she and Clint had sealed their mating a year and  a half ago. Clint did the same, unabashed with a smirk.

“Sorry to come across on edge.” the receptionist apologized quickly, “We always have to file the relationship of the visitors accompanying our patients.”

“It’s okay.” Nat assured, “I’m just here as support. My mate and I have basically adopted James.”

Bucky snorted as he finished signing the papers. It didn’t take long for a nurse to lead them back to a private room where his vitals were taken and symptoms documented for the doctor’s inspection. The omega had some of his blood drawn and had to provide a urine sample before getting undressed from the waist up. By the time he came back to the room, Natasha and Clint had situated themselves on the chairs across from the exam table.

A few minutes later, there was a soft knock on the door before it opened to reveal a shorter beta with messed brown hair, tanned skin, and glasses. “Good afternoon, I’m Dr. Banner.” He held out his right hand and shook Bucky’s hand. He had an ease of scent to him that calmed the omega. Dr. Banner had a boyish-like grin to him that added to his composed demeanor. “So it seems you had an eventful morning?”

Clint snorted behind them. Natasha whacked him on the shoulder.

“Yeah, three positives.” Bucky supplied, feeling itchy from the sight of the white lab coat. He glanced back to his friends to steady himself.  

Dr. Banner nodded, looking over the omega’s chart, “Very good. Well, let’s take a peak and see. Your blood and urine pregnancy tests both came back positive, so I would like to see how far along you are to confirm.”

The younger omega nodded and laid back carefully against the table, pushing his sweatpants down to ride low so that the doctor could place gel over his abdomen in preparation for the ultrasound. Bucky hissed at the cold as the doctor dimmed the lights.

Dr. Banner was smiling and making small talk as he began scanning over the omega’s muscular abdomen with the ultrasound wand. “So is this your first time?”

“Yeah, I’ve never been knocked up before.” He coughed. Clint snickered beside him.

The doctor chuckled good naturedly, “Well it looks like you’re pretty well along already.” He scanned the screen while Bucky tried to decipher what the hell he was seeing.

“Can you see it?” Bucky questioned, craning his neck to get a read on the screen.

“Yes, right here.” Dr. Banner pointed to the screen, his eyes squinting in concentrated focus. “I would say that you’re already at 7 ½ weeks, and looking at the size of the fetuses-“

Clint choked, “ _Fetuses_?”

Both Natasha and Clint were staring, enraptured at the screen while Bucky’s brain seemed to pull to a complete stop.

The doctor’s smile brightened, “Here. If you look on the screen, I show two fetuses.” He pointed with his pointer and index finger where Bucky could clearly see two kidney-bean looking creatures floating in black and white. “Did you conceive during a heat?”

He felt his heart skip a beat.

“It was at the end of a heat. I had sex with my boyfriend at the beginning, but we used condoms. Though, I had unprotected sex then at the end of it.” Bucky clarified.

“Okay. I would put your conception date around the ballpark of either September 17th or 18th. Your tentative due date will be around-“He clicked through the calendar on his screen to put in the calculations “-June 24th.”

Bucky was still reeling by the fact that there were _twins_ when he felt a hand lace with his right hand’s fingers. He looked over to Natasha, who reached to rub at his shoulder.  “You’ve got twins, Barnes.” If Clint’s eyes were a little wet beside her, neither of them said anything.

The doctor then turned on the sound to listen to the heartbeats. They were a symphony of fast rhythmic sounds that frightened and relieved Bucky at the same time. He glanced between the screen and the doctor’s face, noting that he didn’t have any expression of concern.

The fact that he could be carrying twins didn’t seem to cross his mind before, although it should’ve; Twins ran in his family. He had a twin sister and before them, his dad had twin sisters (his aunts Caroline and Evelyn). Of course twins were a possibility and Bucky had never even thought twice about the subject. He began to feel slightly ill again.

“Both of the heartbeats are strong and the fetuses look healthy. I’m going to go ahead and send you home with some care products and reading material to help you with this transition. There are some herbal teas in the package that should alleviate some of the morning sickness, but if it persists, please call me and we can find an alternative for you.” Dr. Banner adjusted his glasses, pulled the wand off of Bucky’s abdomen and began cleaning it off with a towel. He looked up to the omega, “Typically the morning sickness subsides by your second trimester. Do you have any questions or concerns?”

Despite being in a safe place where there was no judgement or discriminations, the omega still blushed as he asked, “So...I had sex with two alphas around the dates you told me. The night of the 17th I had sex with a friend of mine and we didn’t use protection, and then on the afternoon of the 19th I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend, though he didn’t knot me- he came outside of me, on my back.  My boyfriend and I also used protection at the beginning of my heat. Who is uh- who’s more likely the father? Could there be any likelihood that each kid has a different dad?”

Dr. Banner nodded, not seeming surprised or aghast with the question, “Well, to answer the last part of your question, the fetuses are at the exact same developmental point so I would say they definitely have the same sire. As for who the sire is, the timeline points more to your friend Mr. 17. That, and if he knotted you without protection, then all signs point to him. Your boyfriend didn’t knot or ejaculate inside of you, so he’s least likely to be the sire.”

Bucky breathed in shakily, “So you don’t think it is my boyfriend’s?”

“I would say it’s 90% more likely that you conceived on the night of the 17th when you were closer to the end of your heat and were knotted. There’s about a 10% chance that it’s your boyfriend’s, but from my observations and what you’ve told me, I would say it’s your friend who sired. When the pups are a little further in development, we can do a paternal test but it is invasive and holds risks of miscarriage. I strongly advise against it. However, we can test for paternity through a DNA sampling of the fetal genetic material. We would only need samples of your blood and of the possible sire. So in this case, Mr. 17.”

The omega sat up and took in steadying breaths.

He was pregnant.

He was having _twins_.

 _Steve’s_ twins. They could possibly be Brock’s, but it was a very small chance.

 “Are you okay, Mr. Barnes?” Dr. Banner asked, standing up with alarm as if Bucky was about to keel over and faint. He held out his hands to steady his patient.

“I’m just…I need a moment to process this.” The brunette clarified. “Could I have a few minutes?”

“Absolutely. Let me get those supplies together for you and I’ll be back.” Dr. Banner tipped his head towards Clint and Natasha, who were also now standing and right beside the omega.

When the doctor exited, Bucky turned to the beta and alpha. Natasha wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him into her soft, comforting scent.

“I don’t know if I can do this.” The brunette broke down, the sharp sting of tears muddling his vision. He was completely overwhelmed by the situation and what to do.

Natasha rubbed at his back gently, “You have options, James. You don’t need to go through with the pregnancy-“

He shook his head adamantly. “No. I want this pregnancy.”

He thought of his own twin, Rebecca, and their closeness growing up. He couldn’t imagine his life without the bond he shared with his sister and the rest of his family.

They were everything to him.

He was afraid that this could be his one chance at ever having a family of his own. After everything he had gone through, after everything his _body_ had been through…he wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Even if they were Steve’s.

 “You know you’re not alone in this, right?” Clint pointed out, “We will help you. These pups will be like our own; we’re family”

Bucky nodded, feeling reassured that no matter the outcome of the situation, he knew he would have the support of his family and close friends.  His mother, Winifred, would be overjoyed to have two more grandchildren and although the thought of twins scared him, he knew deep down he would have a big network of help. Clint and Natasha hadn’t had their own kids due to their own careers and lack of a ‘biological clock’ ticking. However, Bucky had always had the desire to be surrounded with a family, whether it be one of his own blood or formed through close bonds.

Dr. Banner came back into the room to explain the DNA paternity test and asked if Bucky could bring in ‘Mr. 17’ to draw blood and complete the test. It would give Bucky the assurance of the father, as well as help him to set up the next steps. For the omega, this would be step one before he started planning too far ahead.

Before Bucky left, he was given scheduling dates for his check-ups, as well as a class schedule for maternity yoga, stress management, baby care classes, pregnant omega health 101, and Lamaze. He was also given clear instruction to contact the omega clinic in case his partner made him feel unsafe or became volatile. Although Dr. Banner mentioned he wasn’t a counselor, he advised that Bucky wait until they knew the parentage so that he could have proper council first before sharing the news of the pups’ sire with his partner (if that was something he wanted).

Bucky felt green around the gills with the overwhelming amount of information, but he knew the omega clinic would do everything in their power to assist him and ensure his pups were given a good start in life while keeping the omega healthy.

He ended up getting takeout from the deli and if Bucky stayed in his sweatpants on the couch for the rest of day, Nat or Clint didn’t judge him.

They stayed with him in solidarity.

*

Telling Brock that he was pregnant was a lot smoother and easier than he had been expecting, though a part of that was because Bucky was a big coward.

It was Saturday evening and Brock had the next day off after working a tough 5-day grind in the office. He greeted Bucky at the door, pulling him into a deep kiss with his large hands cradling the brunette’s face. The omega melted into the familiarity of Brock’s strength, remembering just how easy it was with him to lose track of his mind as their bodies both flared with arousal.

When the alpha broke the kiss, he moved Bucky’s scarf aside and pressed his nose and lips to the juncture of Bucky’s neck, scenting him. Bucky moaned, his right hand coming up to tangle in the darker haired man’s locks.

“You’re pregnant, aren’t you? I can smell it.” Brock whispered. He licked along Bucky’s neck up to his earlobe. “You smell so good. Taste good, too.”

Bucky gasped, eyes rolling to the back of his head. All bets were off when his boyfriend had his mouth against the omega’s neck and behind his ears. He shivered from the stimulation. “Yeah, it’s twins. There were two heartbeats.” He knew he shouldn’t be spilling so much information so soon, but confirming his pregnancy couldn’t hurt.

Bucky was skirting around the full truth.

Rumlow pulled back and looked Bucky in the eyes in wonder. He ran the thick pad of his thumb over the omega’s lower kiss-reddened lip. There was a soft glint to the alpha’s eyes, which were the closest to an actual emotion close to crying that older man would ever get. He typically hid most of his more ‘weak’ sided emotions, even from Bucky. The omega had never seen him cry or curl up in a ball. Brock typically manifested his stronger emotions in other ways that were not always so savory.

“So I’m going to be a father?” Brock ran his hand through Bucky’s chin-length locks, pushing the hair aside to see all of the omega’s face clearly.

Bucky _knew_ he should tell him.

He knew it was a shit move, but he didn’t want to risk his relationship with Brock by confessing the twins might be Steve’s instead. He still wasn’t 100% sure and he wanted to wait until he was certain before dealing with the alpha’s hot temper. Once he went through with the DNA test and had the results, he would deal with the consequences from there. Even though Brock had a 10% chance of being the sire, it was enough for Bucky to cling to.

It wasn’t the best decision, but he couldn’t stay away from the comfort of his alpha boyfriend. He craved the touch and comfort from the other, especially now when the alpha’s smell helped to calm her nausea with the promise of protection and warmth.

Brock lifted Bucky up, the omega immediately wrapping his strong legs around the bigger man’s hips. The alpha held on to the omega’s ass as he pushed him up against the wall and kissed him; all heated passion and tongue.

When they broke apart, there was an intensity to his eyes.

“Move in with me, James. I want to mate with you; want to claim you with a beautiful mark. Please baby doll, let me have you.” His voice was husky with desire, “Want to knot you, baby.”

Bucky kissed the older man’s forehead in a move to pacify the alpha’s enthusiasm, “In time. I need you to be patient until I get some things sorted first, okay? Can you wait for me, big guy?”

Brock let out a deep exhale, half of him having expected the answer. He kept his emotions in check and nodded, “Whatever you need, doll. I promise to treat you good. You make a good man out of me, and these pups will be no different. I’ll give you everything you want, sweetheart. Will make you feel so good and spoiled.”

He kissed Bucky again, the intent to get more intimate apparent in the way he groped at the shorter man’s ass. The brunette melted into the touch, giving himself over to Brock’s ministrations and attention.

Bucky knew, _knew_ that what he was doing wasn’t fair to Brock, but he was only human. Once he knew for sure what the parentage was, he could begin to strategize. For now, Brock’s familiarity was a grounding relief.

*

Over the past few weeks, Steve had been doing his best to make good on his word to check in on Bucky while also trying to smooth things over with Sharon. He sometimes felt like he was juggling the pair, as Sharon was not inclined to have her fiancé hanging out one-on-one with his best friend due to the hook-up. Sharon was trying to work through her own issues and accept that when Steve had ‘cheated; on her, she had told him she wanted a break.

So in technicality, Steve hadn’t ‘cheated’ exactly, but she still felt her blood boil when thinking of Bucky wrapped around him.

Steve didn’t see the omega in person for a solid two weeks after their coupling, but eventually the brunette agreed to meet with the blonde at the park to talk things out. Steve didn’t allow Sharon’s concern to cloud the fact that Steve cared about his omega best friend and that he would be loyal to him to repair their friendship and reach a solid foundation again.

_*_

_ Then- 5 weeks earlier _

“Thank you for meeting me.” Steve greeted earnestly, looking over the omega nervously. He could tell his friend was weary at first, but Steve wasn’t about to make this awkward. He reached in as his usual greeting and pulled Bucky into a brotherly hug.

Despite Bucky being worried about physical closeness to Steve and what Sharon would think if she saw, he melted into the hug and let out a shaky breath, closing his eyes as Steve’s amazing scent enveloped his being. He patted Steve on the back with his hand before they pulled apart.

“How are you?” Steve asked, all hope evident on his face.

“I’m doing better…I think things will be okay.” Bucky confessed and went straight to the point, “I haven’t told Brock we hooked up, if you’re wondering. I figure we can avoid some unnecessary drama since Brock and I were kind of on a break when you and I fucked.”

Steve cringed. “I hate that word.”

“Well it’s what we did, right?” Bucky chuckled, a self-depreciating smile edging on his lips.

“I would like to think we shared something special.” Steve contended as he led them over to a bench. The pair sat down with a few inches between them, taking in the situation.

After a slow companionable silence, Bucky spoke up, “So how are you and Sharon?”

The alpha shrugged, “As well as we can be. She’s coming around slowly. We’re seeing a relationship counselor and working through our issues. She’s forgiven me for what we did, but it hasn’t been easy.”

“You in the doghouse?”

“In a manner of speaking.” The blonde exhaled. “Either way, she wants to move on. I’d like to get back to where we were before- well, before we hooked up. Is that something you still want? To move forward?”

Bucky did want that. He definitely wanted his best friend back after two weeks of sorting through his thoughts and smoothing things over with his own boyfriend. He didn’t tell Brock of the hook up for fear of the older alpha turning up at Steve’s house to start a fight, to which the thought alone made him feel justified. He and Brock instead worked on trying to be more open in their communication, which Bucky knew was ironic since he was keeping his tryst with Steve a secret. He looked at Steve’s stupidly earnest face and smiled, nodding in agreement.

The blonde pressed on, “James Buchannan Barnes, will you take me back as your idiot best friend?”

Bucky smirked and wrapped his right arm around Steve’s neck, “You look like a sad Labrador, you dork. Yes, of course I want to move on.”

“You mean it?”

“Don’t push your luck, Rogers. I don’t want to talk about feelings or anything.”

Bucky would never be able to forget his night with Steve, but they had been friends for over 20 years and the brunette wasn’t about to let their passion filled night cloud their close bond and all the years of work and growing they had experienced together. He loved Steve and wanted him in any capacity he could have him.

The same went for Steve. The brunette omega was the closest thing he had to family besides his mother, Sarah. He regretted that their night together had made things clouded between them, but he was willing to do whatever he could to ensure their friendship remained strong and that Bucky continued to thrive and do well.

“So does this mean we’re back to our usual Friday hang outs again? It’s been awful without you and your commentary on movie nights.” Steve pointed out.  

Every Friday, Steve liked having friends over to watch movies, go out to play pool, or participate in card and board games. Bucky was a longstanding champion with _Cards Against Humanity_ , only rivaled by Tony and Clint (and occasionally Wanda).

“Yes, Steve. Our playdates are back on again.” Bucky teased with a smile, despite wanting to stay serious. Deep down, he still disagreed with Steve for being engaged to Sharon and he still held an unhealthy desire to climb his best friend like a tree again, but the omega knew he couldn’t always have what he wanted.

Having Steve as a close friend was something he would never give up, his emotions be damned.

He loved Steve, and he knew the blonde felt the same way.

It was a shame Bucky didn’t have the courage or the confidence to bring up the words Steve said to him in bed. He knew he should, but he was afraid it would hurt their friendship more than it would help patch it up.

To Bucky, some things were better left unsaid. He could hold his emotions in in order to further the happiness of others. He knew it was a self-destructive behavior, but with Steve…he would take a bullet for his best friend.

“So goofiness aside…Is there anything else you want to discuss? I’m an open book, Buck.” Steve encouraged. “I want us to be on the same page.”

_Yes._

“No.” Bucky shook his head, “I’m glad we were able to share what we did, but I get that we have a lot going on in our lives. You’re engaged and made your promises to Sharon. I’ve got my recovery to focus on, and Brock and I are doing okay.”

“Did you tell Brock about what happened between us?”

“And risk him showing up at your apartment with his temper and fists?” Bucky’s brows raised as he looked to the other. “We were technically fighting at the time, so I saved him from the confession and an outburst. Besides, Brock isn’t the most faithful guy around the block. I can have my secrets.”

Steve frowned, “You deserve better than that.”

 _Like you?_ Bucky’s brain supplied unhelpfully.

“He gets me, Steve. We’ve both been through hell and despite the rough patches, he’s a good guy. You should make an effort to like him more.”

The blond grumbled unhappily, “He needs to go to anger management.”

“I know, but I can smooth him over real good. _Real_ good, if you get what I mean.”

“Trust me, I’m intimately aware.” Steve replied without thinking.

The pair stared at each other, Steve’s mouth closing as quickly as the words spilled from his mouth. He turned a nice shade of red that had Bucky laughing out loud in mirth.

“Oh my god, Rogers! Is this what it’s going to be like now?!” Bucky couldn’t stop laughing as Steve tried to back pedal. Bucky smacked his shoulder, smiling wide.

Steve never wanted to see that smile disappear.

“I mean- Oh Christ, I couldn’t help myself!” Steve held up his hands in defeat, “I’m sorry Buck, but you set yourself up for that one, you jerk.”

Bucky’s smile dimmed only slightly as he stared at his best friend and began to feel settled with their predicament. The universe may have been cruel and unforgiving, but it had given him Steven Grant Rogers and for that, he could make do with whatever situation they found themselves in.

*

_ Now _

It was Monday evening and Steve was kicking back with a Coca-Cola while he watched _Supernatural_ reruns and awaited the appearance of his best friend. Sam was in the kitchen with his boyfriend Riley, the pair of them unabashedly flirting and squabbling with one another while Sam tried to cook ‘the damn pizza’. Riley’s bright laughter filled the apartment with warmth and calmed Steve’s nerves. Riley and Sam had been dating for a little over a year after they pulled their heads out of their asses and realized they were a great match.

This was the first time Bucky had accepted a request to join Steve at his apartment since they had sex. The blonde was hopeful and had made sure to stock all of Bucky’s favorite food and drinks to appease the omega. Sam had teased him incessantly, rolling his eyes when Steve blushed guiltily. He was sucking up to the brunette omega, wanting to entice him to stay like he used to in the past. Bucky was typically oblivious as he scarfed down guacamole and drank his favorite pale ale while Steve silently preened that he was making his best friend happy.

Since ‘the incident’, Sharon had made it clear to Steve that she was not comfortable with Bucky being in Steve’s living space without Sam there. Even though Sharon didn’t live with Steve, she didn’t want to smell Bucky’s familiar scent lingering among Steve’s things. It made it a little more difficult as the omega’s scent seemed to cling to his clothes and to any space he inhabited. It was why Bucky hadn’t come by Steve’s apartment, but the blonde was tired of it and decided to go back to their tradition.

When Bucky came to the door, Steve had never shuffled so fast from the couch to answer. Sam and Riley watched with interested looks, both of them smirking knowingly as they watched the blonde pat down his hair to look presentable. 

Steve answered the door with a smile, Bucky’s enticing scent hitting him stronger than usual. He scrunched his nose, “Did you put on cologne?”

Bucky shoved the six pack of beer into Steve’s chest as he shuffled past him, “Be nice, punk. I brought you beer.”

The omega walked past him, taking off his jacket and baseball cap to hang it on the coat hanger. He greeted Sam and Riley while he hobbled to take off his shoes.

“We have guacamole, chips, some sweets, and Sam is making homemade pizza-“

“Are you trying to butter me up?” Bucky was already grinning before he looked up at the alpha.

“Yes!” Riley yelled out from the kitchen.

Steve shrugged, unwilling to admit that he was indeed trying to make his best friend happy. He went to the fridge and grabbed one of Bucky’s favorite pale ales. When he offered it, the other man declined, citing that his stomach had been in knots.

“Is it some new medicine? Darcy mentioned that you were going to the doctor.”

Bucky inwardly cursed. “Something like that. Just not feeling it tonight, you know?”

“Sure, Buck.” Steve exchanged the beer for an iced tea, which Bucky took happily.

The four of them decided on _Rocky Horror Picture Show_ , which Steve had never seen in its entirety and to which Sam and Bucky sang along to without shame. It was a successful first hang out night and things felt entirely normal the whole time. The only thing that was markedly different was Bucky’s scent; Steve couldn’t put his finger on it, but it had him exchanging glances with Riley, who seemed to look concerned.

When Steve went to help Riley with dishes (while Sam and Bucky gushed about the movie), the blonde ventured quietly, “You smell him too, right? Something is off. Do you know what it is?”

Riley sighed, glancing back at the other two before lowering his voice. He looked to Steve sternly while he was mid-arm deep in soap bubbles, “I know that scent, but I think you need to talk to him about it. It might not be something he is ready to share.”

The alpha scrunched his brows in confusion, “Ready to share?”

“Just be patient with him.” Riley whispered as he pulled the drain stopper and began to wipe off his hands.

“Can you tell me?”

The omega smiled sadly, his knowing eyes enough to have Steve concerned, “It’s an omega thing. Just be cool, Steve. I’m sure he’ll tell you.”

Steve looked forlornly at Riley, “You’re really not going to share?”

“Nope. Lock and key.” Riley zipped his lips and winked before turning back to join his boyfriend and Bucky. Steve was left with the few remaining dishes to dry, frowning in confusion as he tried to process the interaction.

*

Sam and Riley had cleared out to their bedroom to engage in more interesting activities, leaving Steve and his best friend alone in the living room.

The alpha took a long sip of his beer before speaking, “Mind telling me why you’re really not drinking?” He wondered if Bucky was having a hard time with liquor again; if he was on any of the medications that helped him from dissociating or with the night terrors. If Bucky was on medication, Steve wanted to know. The last time Bucky was on anti-anxiety meds, it had caused some side effects that took some working through. He wanted to be there for him.

“My head is on straight, if yer wondering’.” Bucky replied. “But I’ve got bigger things going on that we need to talk about.”

The blonde straightened next to him, listening intently to Bucky’s every word.

“Look, Steve…some things have come up that are pretty serious so I need you to not freak out until I’m done explaining, okay?”

Nervousness filled the air, both from Bucky and from Steve. The blonde had leaned towards him marginally, his brows creased in worry as the brunette faced him.

Bucky inhaled a shaky breath, trying to soothe the knots in his stomach (and praying he didn’t barf on his best friend).

“I’ve been sick for a while and I went to the doctor last week. I’m-“ Bucky faltered in fear of the words and how they would impact the other making him nearly choke. He managed to breathe out. “I’m pregnant.”

Steve leaned back, his brows very nearly reaching his hairline.  He didn’t say anything for a while, his face a mess of emotions that left Bucky wondering what the true reaction would be. Whatever Steve had been preparing to hear, it wasn’t this.

“You with me, Stevie?” he asked.

“Wow. Just- I’m- I’m shocked.” He let out a deep breath and smiled unsteadily, “I’m happy for you, Buck. I truly am; I know how much you’ve wanted kids and I’m sure Brock is ecstatic.”

He leaned forward to offer a hug in congratulations, but Bucky pressed his right hand against Steve’s chest to push him back. He shook his head.

“That’s not all.” Bucky clarified as he looked at the blonde’s anxious face. “I’m about 8 weeks along now. The doctor said I conceived around September 17th.”

Steve sat back, inhaling sharply. He didn’t have to ponder that date long as it stuck out very visibly in his mind. He looked down, his thoughts a mess as he tried to process what Bucky was implying.

“So that means…?”

“Doc says there’s a 90% chance they’re yours.” Bucky clarified.

“They?” Steve repeated, breathless as his eyes widened. He looked like he had gotten punched in the gut.

“Twins.”

Steve stood up from the couch, his left hand running through his hair in a panic. He paced slowly in front of the omega, his breathing becoming slightly erratic.

“Steve?” the omega tried to bring him back to the present. He began to feel self-conscious for bringing up the subject, but he knew it needed to be done. Steve was the third person he had told besides Nat and Clint.

When the alpha turned around, there were tears in his eyes. Bucky’s face fell as he tried not to give into the waterworks, but his hormones be damned, he found salty tears filling his eyes and threatening to run down his cheeks.

“Don’t you dare make me ugly cry, you asshole.” Bucky’s voice shook, trying to make light of the situation.

Steve had a hard time speaking around the lump in his throat, “So you’re pregnant with twins…with _my_ twins.”

“Seems that way, punk.”

“You said 90%. Are you sure they’re not Rumlow’s?”

Bucky scratched the back of his neck, “Well that’s partly why I wanted to talk to you in person. I want to do a DNA test. The doctor needs both of our blood samples- it’s completely non-invasive for the pups and they’ll be able to cross-analyze and determine if you’re the sire.”

“Yes, absolutely. Just tell me what I need to do and I’ll be there.” Steve agreed. He took in another breath and carefully approached the omega. “But you said 90% so that means…”

“We fucked up, Stevie. That’s what it means.” Bucky sighed.

“Are you going to keep the pregnancy?” Steve asked, looking suddenly nervous as if he didn’t want to get his hopes up. “I will 100% support you on whatever you decide to do. I won’t interfere if you want to-“

“I’m keeping them.” Bucky interjected. “Even if you’re the sire, I want to keep them.”

Steve took in a sharp inhale and nodded, looking relieved and overwhelmed.

“You know I’ll be there with you every step of the way, as much as I can be.” Steve promised. He bit his lip and looked down to the omega’s stomach, “I know this is weird, but can I…?”

“Yeah, but there ain’t much to feel other than that I’m a little bloated.” Bucky consented. He sat up more, allowing Steve to sit beside him and carefully place a hand under his shirt to the warmth of his abdomen where underneath there was life growing.

As much as he wanted to reserve himself, Steve couldn’t help the overflow of emotions as tears streamed down his face.  Bucky reached up with his arms and wrapped them around Steve’s shoulders, allowing the alpha to rest his face against Bucky’s shoulder and scent him.

“So what you’re smelling? That’s my hormones going haywire.” Bucky murmured amidst the silence. “That’s _our_ twins making us all goofy and emotional.”

“I’m so sorry I did this to you.” Steve said as he pulled back, wiping his eyes and nose on his long sleeves. Despite how handsome he was, he was a terrible crier. It made Bucky feel better that they were both a hot mess. “Have you told Brock?”

Bucky sighed, “Brock knows I’m pregnant, but he doesn’t know that he might not be the sire. I want to do the test first before I break any news to him. I’m not sure how he’d react.”

“Probably for the best right now, though you shouldn’t lie to him once we know for certain.”

“I don’t know how he’ll react, but I’d brace yourself for it if I were you.” Bucky wiped at his own eyes. “If you are the dad, what are we going to tell Sharon? Are you okay with me having your pups? Will _she_ be okay with it?”

The blonde looked grim for a moment, “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. However this ends up, I do want you to know that I don’t regret what we did. This isn’t exactly how we envisioned things, but…it’s happening.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t go through with an abortion. I know it’s selfish, but they’re mine and if they’re yours-“

Steve was shaking his head, biting his lip as he tried to swallow his emotions. “Please don’t apologize. I’d be honored to be their dad, no matter how messy this situation gets.”

It would be so easy for Bucky to take advantage of the situation and be selfish; he wanted to kiss Steve. He wanted the comfort of his best friend in the one way they both knew they couldn’t go through with again. He wanted Steve in whatever way he could have him. For now, it would be to hold close to the possibility that Steve was in him in the form of their own offspring.

“So when do you want to take this test?” Steve prompted. “My schedule is flexible, so I’m available whenever you need me.”

“I’ll call tomorrow morning and let you know. Sooner rather than later would be preferable.”

“Yeah-that’s good. Just…wow. I’m still in shock.” Steve admitted with a slight shake in his voice. They were close to one another on the couch, so when Steve’s phone began to buzz, they both nearly jumped out of their skin.

Steve shot up from the couch quickly as he read the text.

“Sharon is here.” He stated, wiping his face with his sleeve. Bucky inwardly cursed that of all the times, she had to pick this intimate situation to come over. He tried to straighten his own face out, wiping his eyes with his sleeve and coughing to get rid of the shake in his own voice.

Not a moment too soon, the door unlocked and Sharon came in, fumbling with her keys and gym bag. Steve was in the foyer, quick to help her as she steadied herself. She gave him a perfunctory kiss on the lips before pausing and glancing behind him to see Bucky. Her eyes averted back to her fiancé questioningly.

Steve shrugged, “I missed him on Friday so we’re making up for it.”

Sharon sighed and walked past him. “Hello, James.” She greeted, though it was without the genuine friendly tone.

Feeling frustrated that they had been on the wrong side of things for almost two months since he and Steve had hooked up, Bucky addressed it immediately with a humorous tone to his voice, “Don’t worry Sharon, we’re behaving.”

Sharon glared at him while Bucky approached, leaving behind the conversation he had just had with Steve that he was very much pregnant and feeling emotionally vulnerable. Steve still seemed overwhelmed and quietly reeling from Bucky’s news.

“Can we start over, please? I know you’re still pissed about what happened between Steve and I, and you’ve been avoiding me, but you guys are getting married and we need to move forward.” Bucky addressed the fellow omega.

“Bucky, right now might not be the right time…“Steve sighed.  

“No, let him finish.” Sharon crossed her arms and looked to Bucky.

“Your engagement party is next weekend and I want to do the toast without you glaring daggers at me. Can we please be cool?” Bucky questioned. “You’re my best friend’s fiancé. We need to form a truce.”

“A truce?” Sharon echoed.

“Yeah.”

Sharon approached the omega and slapped him across the face. It wasn’t the hardest slap she could dish out, but it was enough to sting.

Steve yelled out in surprise and sped to approach, but Bucky held up his hand to halt him. He laughed through the sting of it. “There we go, Shar. Did that make you feel better? Slap the cripple?”

“Yes.” Sharon seethed. “You two can be such assholes. I didn’t expect an ambush.”

“No other way for me to get you to listen.” Bucky wiped his still runny nose on his black sleeve. “Now with that done, are we good?”

The blonde omega leveled him with an intense look until nodding and walking forward, pulling him into a hug.  With her arms wrapped around Bucky’s solid middle, she muttered, “Lay off my man, you asshole, or else I’ll do worse damage.”

“Sure thing.” The brunette acquiesced.

Sharon seemed to soften. “I don’t hate you, but you can understand why I’m not excited to see you alone with Steve right now.”

“I get it. It’s fine, Sharon. I just want us to be cool with one another.”

Sharon backed away, glancing warily to her fiancé and then back at Bucky, “You both reek of distress and hormones, by the way. Maybe you should head home, Barnes.”

It wasn’t a question.

Bucky looked towards Steve, who was still peering at him with such open emotion of longing that it made the omega’s heart clench in hurtful yearning. He was leaving Steve after dumping the news that they were having twins together.

Nonetheless, Bucky respected Sharon’s claims on the situation and backed away.

Bucky felt like he was following a trend in his own cowardice.

*

Steve met Bucky at the omega clinic the following afternoon, still carrying the annoyance from the night before when Bucky had gloated at Sharon to hit him.

“It wasn’t one of your smartest moves.” Steve grumbled as the technician began to draw blood from him. Bucky sat across from the alpha, getting his own blood drawn.

“If I wasn’t so nauseous today, I would argue with you.” Bucky was paler than usual, which prompted the technician to give him some orange juice as soon as his blood draw was done. Bucky stayed in the chair, feeling light-headed and exhausted.

When Steve was done, he went over to help Bucky up from the chair. They were assured that they would have the results in 5-7 days after the samples had been sent off to the lab to be tested. Steve wrapped his arm around the slighter omega, leading him out and keeping him steady.

“How are you not freaking out?  I’m scared to death and you’re as cool as a cucumber.” Bucky muttered, leaning into the blonde’s support.

Steve sighed, “Don’t get me wrong, I’m scared shitless, Buck. I guess it just hasn’t really hit me yet…I saw the ultrasound photos and everything, but maybe when you start showing? I didn’t sleep well last night, though. I’m just- I’m still in shock. Give a guy a few days.”

“That’s reasonable, as I dumped the news on you out of the blue.”

“We had unprotected sex.” Steve shrugged, “I shouldn’t have been surprised. I guess in light of everything, I’m glad it’s you.”

Bucky stopped.

“You’re glad it’s me?” the omega repeated.

Steve paused and looked him over, “You’re my best friend; family even. If there was anyone I could get into this situation with, it would be you. I trust you.”

“What about Sharon?”

There was a press of his lips that told of a memory resurfacing. The blonde looked down at the sidewalk with a serious expression. “Sharon doesn’t want kids.”

Bucky stared at him in disbelief.

Uncomfortable with the silence, Steve continued, “I fully support her, by the way. In her line of work it would be risky having a dependent.  I figured we could have a pack of dogs; less work, you know?”

“You just compared having kids to having a dog.”

Steve blushed, “I’m sorry.”

“So how do you feel about having kids?” Bucky asked. “Because I’m sorry if you were also adamant about not having any.” He gestured towards his stomach.

“Well I always thought I would leave it up to my partner since I obviously can’t get pregnant. I figured some of our friends would have kids and that would give me a baby fix, so to speak. But now that you’re pregnant? I’m very okay with it.”

“You didn’t really answer my question.”

Steve blushed, “From the heart? Yes.”

The omega secretly brightened inside at the admission; that Steve wanted kids and that Bucky could give that to him (if Brock was truly not the father).

And then Brock came to Bucky’s mind…the man who had always said he’d love to have a family with Bucky and mate with him.

He felt guilty.

Steve walked him all the way back to Bucky’s apartment, accompanying the omega into the apartment. They hung out and played video games for the rest of the day until Clint came home first and joined them on the N64, playing Golden Eye.

When Natasha got home, she sighed and shook her head, “ _Grown children_.” She mumbled as she decided to order in the usual Chinese food. When she finished and came back into the main room, she smacked Steve on the side of the head.

“Ow! What was _that_ for?” Steve rubbed at his head, but he was laughing as Nat put her hands on her hips.

“For not using a condom, you idiot. Don’t worry, I already smacked James upside the head, too.” She opened her beer with her bare hands and perched herself at the edge of the couch in a graceful motion.

“We’re all good, Nat.” Bucky reassured the redhead. “Right now we are waiting on the test results and then we can properly freak out.”

Clint snorted, “What about Steve’s engagement party this weekend? I’m already freaking out over that. You make a toast at your best friend’s party while pregnant with his kids? That’s some Jerry Springer material right there.”

Steve reddened, “There’s a 10% chance I’m not the sire.”

“And 90% you are. Better get your ducks in a row before things get _really_ crazy, Rogers.” Clint was smirking at the accused pair. “This weekend is going to be a good one, I can feel it.”

“You’re terrible at predicting good outcomes.” Natasha added.

“We’ll see about that.”

*

The omega wasn’t surprised when he got the call on Friday that Steve was indeed the sire; that there had been a 100% match of confirmed parentage. Bucky came home from work in a morose state as he tried to think of the next steps.

He texted Steve first.

 **Buck:** Test came back positive. Congrats, Rogers.

 **Stevie** : !!!! I’m speechless.

 **Buck** : I’m going to wait until next week to tell Brock. I need to break it to him gently.

 **Stevie:** Want me there?

 **Buck** : You kiddin? He’ll murder you.

 **Stevie:** ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

 **Buck** : Can you be serious? I’m freakin out here.

 **Stevie:** Me too. Let’s talk after the party this weekend?

 **Buck:** Sure thing. I’ll try not to freak out.

 **Stevie** : Call me if you need me, Please?

 **Buck** : No promises

 **Stevie** : Jerk.

*

Steve’s engagement party should’ve been the highlight of Bucky’s week, but it became the one event the omega dreaded as it got closer. The day of the party, Bucky feigned sickness and stayed in bed for most of the morning, grumbling quiet obscenities when Nat or Clint tried to get him up. It wasn’t until Brock finally came over to pick him up that the omega got out of bed and went through the motions of getting dressed in a nice suit.

The actual engagement party was being hosted by Sharon’s parents, who were well-to-do and had pulled out all the stops for their only child. Bucky began to feel better about the whole situation when he saw that his family and Sarah Rogers had been invited to the event. Having many familiar faces surrounding him was enough to soothe over his nerves enough to allow him to deliver a best man’s toast later on.

Bucky’s twin sister Becca was the first to greet him, smiling smugly as she wrapped him into a hug. She eyed Brock up and down, evaluating him, “Hope you two can behave yourselves.”

“No guarantees.” Brock was smiling wolfishly, which already put Bucky on edge. The alpha had downed two beers before they had left his apartment, and the man didn’t seem to want to let up as he disappeared from Bucky’s side to search for his next drink and mingle.

For most of the night, the brunette went through the motions. He greeted his family, spoke with Sarah, talked with his friends; all while knowing Steve’s kids were growing inside him. He felt out of place, even though he was Steve’s best man and childhood friend. In the face of Sharon’s parents and all the people who had turned out to show the couple their love and support, Bucky couldn’t shake the feeling of being a homewrecker with a scarlet letter pinned to his chest.

If he acted strange or distant, he could at least feign it as a bad reaction to some medication. His close friends and family knew what he had gone through, so he was left with a viable excuse that gained him the ability to excuse himself frequently to the solace of the bathroom or outside to compose himself.

He felt itchy under his skin; the type of itch that a cigarette or a drink could qualm. He was out of luck with both, as his condition made it worse.

While he was outside, warning his hands, his mother came out next to him with a surprised look.

“So is it true? Are you and Brock expecting twins?” Winifred asked, straight to the point as her eyes gleamed with a smile.

Bucky froze.

“What?”

“Are you pregnant? Brock told me, but I want to hear it from you.” Winifred encouraged, “I’m sorry if you weren’t ready to say anything, but I need to know…”

The omega reddened in annoyance, ears burning with the irritation that Brock might be running his mouth to his family.

“Yes, it’s true. It’s twins but I don’t want to say anything yet.”

Winifred pulled him into a hug, kissing the top of her son’s hair, “I’m so happy for you two. I won’t say anything, but tomorrow can we discuss? I know its Steve’s and Sharon’s night.” She was wiping at the joyful tears in her eyes.

Bucky straightened, “Thanks, ma. We’ll talk more tomorrow, but I need to do damage control before my stupid boyfriend runs his mouth to everyone.”

“You better hurry up before he reaches your father. You know he would rather hear it from you.” Winifred patted his hand before letting it go, smiling knowingly.

The omega cursed and made his way back into the party, scanning the room and marching over to his boyfriend. Brock was talking with Becca, looking dopey-eyed as he was discussing something about _moving in_ and _mating_.

Becca smirked when she saw her brother arrive, opening her mouth to question-

“Later. And yes, it’s true. The pups part. Give me second.” Bucky stated lowly as he grabbed ahold of his boyfriend and hauled him out of the room in an awkward shuffle as quickly as possible. Steve caught his eyes from across the room, brow raised in question as Bucky disappeared around the corner.

“Why are you telling everyone?” Bucky seethed as he let go of Brock’s wrist and faced him fully once they were away from the other guests and allowed some privacy.

The alpha looked surprised by the omega’s temper and chuckled, “Can you blame me for being excited, sweetheart?”

“ _Yes_. You’re being an ass.” The younger man glanced back at the building, making sure that the guests outside were paying them no mind. He didn’t want to cause a scene, but he also didn’t want more people coming up to him about his pregnancy or supposed ‘I heard you’re mating with Brock soon’. Brock was mildly drunk and this factor alone made it all the more worse; the man shouldn’t have been drinking as it egged on his more negative and aggressive behaviors. “You need to go home and sleep this off.”

“I’m having fun! It’s you that’s being a brat about everything.” Brock spat.

Bucky’s lips pressed tightly. “I don’t want people to know yet. You need to stop telling them we’re going to mate. And don’t you _dare_ run your mouth off to my dad.”

Brock reached out and took hold of Bucky’s right arm, yanking him roughly along to go back inside, “C’mon doll, stop being stubborn and lets have a good time.”

And this was why Bucky had refused the proposals to move in.

He didn’t enjoy admitting to the fact that when Brock drank, he sometimes got physical.

It was a fact Bucky was willing to take to the grave.

“I don’t want to go back in there with you.” Bucky groused as he tried to pull his arm away.

Brock reached around and grabbed his left arm, pulling him against his broad chest, nearly dragging along Bucky’s feet from the gravel of the landscape. The omega couldn’t get away as both of his arms were pulled in bruisingly hard. His left arm immediately began to ache.

“Don’t embarrass me, doll. Play your cards right and I’ll make you feel good tonight.” Brock leaned in and mouthed over Bucky’s bonding gland at the base of his neck.

“ _Stop it_.” Bucky pleaded in a whisper, side eyeing to see they had drawn a small crowd of spectators. “You’re being rough and irrational.”

“You like it rough.” Rumlow laughed, though there was no humor in it.

Bucky closed his eyes and tried to calm his worries so that his distressed scent didn’t bring about the attention he’d been trying to avoid. “How much have you been drinking?” he questioned.

“It doesn’t matter. I can have a good time, right? I deserve it with all the overtime I work. Now, let’s go have us a nice round on the dancefloor.” Brock turned and pulled Bucky along with him.

Knowing when he had been defeated, he followed after the alpha in reserved anger. It was rare when Brock got like this, but he didn’t want to egg on the man’s short temper by refusing him. Brock put up a lot with Bucky and his problems, and this was an example of Bucky dealing with his boyfriend’s misgivings in return. Neither of them were perfect and because of this, the omega continued to stay despite the low points.

So Bucky grinned and bore with the embarrassment. Steve passed by him a few times, each time giving him a questioning look that the omega brushed off. He could at least appreciate the distraction in the way Steve fumbled with Sharon on the dancefloor. Steve always did have two left feet.

Later on when Bucky came back from the restroom, he found his boyfriend speaking this time to Steve. Brock was waiting outside for him and seemed to have caught the soon-to-be-groom on his favorite topic; Bucky.

“You know, after these pups are born, I’m sure we’re going to have an army of kids. Bucky’s got the hips for birthing, right? His sister is the same way; damn, Becca was always such a knockout. You know our kids are going to be gorgeous, don’t you think?” Brock was running his mouth, looking damn proud of himself and looking like a fool again.

Steve looked rigid and uncomfortable next to him, his brows furrowed with the effort of holding back what Bucky was sure was a long choice of words or a swift punch.

“We’ve been trying forever you know; I almost thought his parts were broken or somethin. Guess it just took the millionth try.” Brock was smiling like an idiot. “Not that I’m complaining with the trying.”

Steeling himself, Bucky walked out of the doorway to join them (and partly save Steve from the awkwardness). “Hey.” He greeted.

Brock brightened as the omega approached. “See? I could watch them hips swing towards me forever and never get sick of it. Amiright, Stevie boy?”

Steve did his best to ignore the drunk alpha. “You okay, Buck? You smelled off earlier.”

Not wanting to have this conversation, he shrugged it off. “Hormones. At least the bacon wrapped shrimp tasted as good as it did when it went down.” He offered to lighten the mood.

The blonde grimaced.

Brock, not wanting to be ignored, pushed off the wall and walked past Steve to get into Bucky’s space. He gripped the back of the omega’s neck in a show of dominance and kissed his forehead. The younger man allowed it to happen, calming his nerves as the older man scent marked him brazenly in front of Steve. It was a territorial show against another alpha.

The blonde felt the hairs on the back of neck raise at the aggressive show of dominance and Bucky’s passive face. He wasn’t inept; he now understood where the smell of distress was coming from.

“I think you need to cool off, Brock.” Steve interrupted.

Brock kissed the top of Bucky’s forehead and did pull away to look at Steve. “You know, I think James and I will be heading out. It’s not good for him to be out so late in his delicate condition.”

The omega reddened with anger. “I already told you no. I’m going home with Nat and Clint; I’m their designated driver.”

 “They can get a cab.” Brock reached down to grab Bucky’s hand, but the omega pulled it away. Brock chuckled, “You’re playing feisty again with me now, huh sweetheart?”

When Brock’s hand went up to grip at Bucky’s arm again, Steve stepped forward with a low growl and shoved at Brock.

“He said no, Rumlow.” Steve stated, “I can call you a cab.” Steve wasn’t suggesting; he was commanding. .

“He can speak for himself to his alpha.” Brock raised his chin cockily, challenging the blonde.

Frustrated, Bucky shook his head, “Fucking hell, if it will get you to calm the fuck down, fine. I’ll drive us out of here, Brock.” If this would end the annoyance he had been feeling all night, plus do damage control, then Bucky would gladly bow out.

Steve shook his head, “No, you should be here with us, Buck. Don’t let him bully you.” Beside, you haven’t made your toast yet.” 

“He’s my omega, Rogers. Back off.”

“Are you _seriously_ challenging him right now?!” Bucky groaned, trying to dismiss the situation. “Fuck this, _I’m_ out of here. I’m getting Nat.”

The older alpha growled and lunged after his boyfriend, pulling Bucky back roughly by the arm. “No, you’re staying _here_.”

Steve saw red.

“Don’t touch him!” he snarled and shoved at Brock to let go. He did, surprised that the other man was finally reacting.

Brock began to laugh. He reached out and grabbed Bucky again, pulling the omega forcefully to his side. Bucky began looking around for help, trying to figure out a way to de-escalate the situation. The rugged alpha wrapped an arm around Bucky’s middle and that set off something in the blonde; to see another man’s claim so close to his pups.

“Let him go.” Steve was trying to reel himself in, but he was having a hard time.

“James is my omega. I don’t know why you’re getting all worked up on who he goes home with. Unless you’ve got it out to bone your friend. Maybe we could switch?” Brock suggested. “I’ll take your fiancé for a spin and you can try him out. I’ve broken him in for you pretty good.”

“Brock.” Bucky warned warily, wishing the alpha would stop goading Steve. Brock and Steve never truly got along with one another, and this whole situation was making it worse. Brock with alcohol and (possibly) pain medicine mixed together made him into a person the omega detested. It was only now that Steve was seeing this side of him, and hating him more for it.

“What do you say, blondie? A little pre-marital treat.”

“He’s not your property, you asshole! Just as those pups are not yours!” Steve growled, baring his teeth.

Bucky paled.

Brock frowned, brows furrowed in confused annoyance. “What the hell are you getting at?”

“Steve.” Bucky said his name in warning, “You need to calm down.”

“You need to tell him, Buck.” Steve shot back angrily. .

“Fucking hell, this is ridiculous. You both need to stop. For god sakes Rogers, we’re at your _engagement_ party. Please let me take my drunk boyfriend home before we ruin it and Sharon despises me for all eternity.” Bucky pleaded, “We’ll be fine, _I’ll_ be fine. Now back off.”

“What’s he talking about?” Brock grilled, looking over to Bucky.

“He’s running his mouth. C’mon, let’s get home, yeah?” Bucky encouraged the alpha along, appeasing to his gentler side as he wrapped his right arm around the alpha’s middle and walked with him towards the parking lot. Steve watched them go, face etched in concern and resentment.

He felt ashamed for allowing his protective side to come out. He tried to let Bucky and Brock fade in the distance.

However, Steve was never one to back down easily when he felt there was something wrong.

*

Brock wouldn’t let it go.

He was fixated on what Steve had said, and it grew worse as they went out into the parking lot and he confronted the omega.

“What did he mean by the pups _aren’t_ mine? Did you fuck some other guy?!” Brock fumed, needing the truth now more than ever. “There’s no way golden boy back there would just say that if it wasn’t true!”

Bucky shook his head, “You need to sober up, Brock.”

“No, you need to fucking answer me!” Brock growled and turned on Bucky, pushing him against a car with a loud and sudden thud. “Why did Steve say they aren’t mine?!”

Panic began to creep under Bucky’s skin. Rumlow had only ever been this angry and belligerent one other time and the effects of his anger hadn’t left Bucky unscathed. The brunette unconsciously covered his stomach, protecting it. He knew it took a lot for Brock to get to this point, but here they were. It hadn’t been this bad in over a year and Bucky blamed the raging alpha hormones for it. Steve fueling the fire also hadn’t helped.

“Answer me!” Brock was getting into his face, challenging the younger man to defy him.

“Because it might be true, okay? When we were on a break, I had sex with another guy.” Bucky gasped, feeling compelled to tell the truth as Brock wouldn’t lay off him. He scanned the parking lot helplessly, trying to make a plan to get away without causing a scene. If he could just calm Brock down, things would be better, but Brock was like an erupting volcano.

Brock pushed away, running his fingers through his hair to cool himself off. He was pissed off and the scent of his anger hurt the omega’s nose.

“Who was it?” Brock questioned.

Bucky looked down to his feet. “Brock, please…”

“Who was it?!”

“I’m not-“

Brock rampaged forward, shoving Bucky back against the car, his fists in his jacket, “I swear to god, Barnes-“

“It was Steve!”

Brock threw his arm back, punching forward with all his might to shatter the window of the car Bucky was against. He dented some of the metal of the window as well, proving just how powerful he was. The omega shook, gasping as feelings of terror and panic constricted his throat. He stood frozen where he leaned back against the car, which was now blaring its alarm. He could barely register as his ears burned with the resounding urge to get away.

The alpha had the smaller man caged in with his other arm, eyes looking to him gravely.

“Why am I not surprised?” Brock turned to the side and spat. “Of course Rogers would fuck you the first chance he got. Was it good?”

Bucky’s face crumpled, “I don’t-“

“Was it worth it?” Brock chuckled darkly. There were voices yelling in the background and people coming out to see the commotion. “I’m sure you got nice and wet for him, didn’t you?”

Bucky closed his eyes, dread taking control, “I’m so sorry...”

“Yeah?” Brock growled, pushing back to kick at the car door just right of the omega, causing a sizable dent that had the omega’s knees nearly giving out from fear. “Well I’m fucking sorry, too.”

Brock took a step back, just as Sam and Riley were running down. Sam had a low growl in the back of his throat, threatening the bigger alpha.

“What did you do?!” Sam yelled, putting himself defensively between Brock and Bucky.

Rumlow held up his hands, his right hand entirely bloody with glass sticking out of his thick skin. He barely registered the pain.

Bucky was hyperventilating, eyes glazed over as Riley tried to calm him and bring him back to the present. He checked him over, finding no immediate physical wounds except for the way Bucky clutched at his stomach as if he were prepared to get gutted like a fish.

There was a partygoer in the background crying out as they approached and saw the damage on their car. “What the fuck!? That’s brand new, you jackass!”

Brock kept his eyes on Sam as he backed away. When Natasha joined Riley to calm Bucky down, the older alpha turned to make his exit, but not before Steve was getting up into his face while Sharon screamed at him from behind to stop.

“What did you do to him?!” Steve demanded, seething in anger.

“What did _you_ do to him, Rogers? Knocking him up all nice and full with your knot. Congrats on the twins; mazal tov, asshole.”  Brock shoved past him with his shoulder, “You can bill me for whoever’s car I jacked up, I don’t give a fuck.”

Brock kept walking, but stopped before Sharon and smiled wolfishly, “You should keep a leash on your man. He knocked up mine so if you’re feeling lonely, you can hit me up. Eye for an eye, right, sweet cheeks?” He winked and stalked past the crowd to get himself a cab.

Looking aghast, Sharon turned to question her fiancé if what Rumlow had said was really true. However, the blonde alpha was already leaning in front of Bucky, trying to help him up as Nat insisted they take him home.  

While Sharon’s thoughts were a torrid mess of confusion and anger, her cousin Peggy walked up alongside her with two flutes of champagne.

“I have to say, this is the most eventful engagement party I’ve ever been to.” Peggy looked towards the blonde and handed her a flute of champagne.

Sharon’s face was set with a deep scowl as she downed the whole flute of champagne before grabbing Peggy’s and finishing the rest of hers as well. 

 _Eventful_ wasn’t the word Sharon was thinking of.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To start, I am completely stunned with the amount of love, support, and feedback I’ve received from this fic. Wow! I’m a little speechless. Thank you so much for reading. <3
> 
> So Steve is an illustrator and Bucky works as an engineer for Tony. I do apologize if Sharon is a little OOC. She hasn’t fully forgiven the boys for canoodling.
> 
> Bucky isn’t typically a big crier, but let’s blame it on the hormones, shall we?
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I apologize for the angst and the drama…I can’t help myself. XD Also, the engagement party isn't over yet! Bucky still has his toast!!  
> (Also, I am definitely still writing for _Love, Bucky_. I'm just editing and writing the next chapter still, as I want it to be edited appropriately before posting it. Thank you for your patience!  <3)  
> [My tumblr](http://valkyriegail76.tumblr.com/)  
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/AmethystValkyri)  
> 


	3. The Right Partner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The omega would have to eventually tell them the parentage as well…about how he had made a mistake and had ruined what was left of his long-running relationship with Brock while pining for someone he couldn’t have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: Please mind the tags! This is completely un-betaed so any mistakes are my own.

Bucky was doing his best to convince himself that he could get over what just happened and move on. He tried to go over the mantras in his mind to soothe his breathing and quell the pumping of adrenaline reverberating loudly in his ears. His steel-blue eyes were closed as he tried to think of his safe place; of Coney Island in the summer with the smell of mustard and ketchup on fresh off the cart hotdogs. The stable feeling of breathing in salty sea air that filled his lungs and purified them with promise.

_Why can’t I breathe?_

He was breathing in the smoke and sand filled air of Afghanistan; choking on the grains as they scratched his throats and weighted his lungs in stone. His body shook, trying to move away from the danger, but his balance felt off, ears ringing, blood choking-

“Bucky, you’re _safe_.” Natasha’s voice crashed over him like cold water, washing away the sand and smoke. “ _Come back_.”

Natasha and Riley were both crouched beside him, checking him over and trying to ground him into the present. He focused on their words, pushing past the ringing in his ears where the fight or flight instinct was pumping aggressively through his veins. Strong pacifying hands ran up and down his upper arms.

“Hey, there you are.” Riley soothed when he saw Bucky’s eyes focus in recognition, “It’s going to be okay, Bucky. You’re not wounded, just spooked. Do you know where you’re at?”

Bucky groaned, hoping he hadn’t dissociated for too long. He looked around at his surroundings, finding Natasha vigilantly beside him while Riley was checking him over again.

“I’m still in the parking lot, aren’t I?” He groaned and pushed his head back against the damaged car door with a thud, “Fuck. Please tell me I wasn’t gone for too long.”

“Only a few minutes.” Natasha comforted.

“Where’s Brock?”

“He’s gone. Are you feeling ready to try moving? We can head out of here if you need.” The redhead suggested as she stood up and took in their background. They hadn’t drawn in a lot of prying eyes, but some of the party goers that had been outside had been ushered back inside by Clint and Tony. Steve was still standing in the distance with Sam, waiting to be given permission to step forward. Riley had barked at him to stay back while he and Natasha assessed the well-being of the omega.

“I’ll be fine.” Bucky began moving up with shaky legs as both of his friends supported his weight. He felt overly off balance as he took in deep breaths, adjusting to the distribution of weight where his left arm was damaged. His right hand instinctively went down to his abdomen, pressing softly to measure if there was any pain.

_Nothing._

He let out a sigh of relief.

“It doesn’t look like you’re injured, but I need to ask…is this something that happens regularly? Has this happened before with Brock?” Riley questioned in a low voice for some semblance of privacy.

Bucky’s ears burned from the implication of the questions. He didn’t want to discuss his relationship issues, even though they had been aired out so blatantly in front of anyone who looked hard enough. His mouth was set in a grim line as he responded, “He’s not supposed to be drinking and taking pain killers, if that’s what you mean. He gets like that.”

“Has he ever laid his hands on you before?” Riley was a nurse and dealt with omegas in abusive situations regularly. Bucky didn’t want to be a part of that roster, so he shook his head stubbornly and began to move away from the vehicle.

He didn’t miss the exchange of concerned looks between Natasha and Riley.

“I’m okay, all right? If Brock is gone, I’d like to enjoy this night properly. I still have a toast to do, remember?” Bucky muttered, feeling overly defensive to compensate for his mortification at what just happened. He hoped and prayed that he hadn’t ruined Steve and Sharon’s engagement party, just as much as he hoped his family hadn’t witnessed what happened.

Steve was approaching him now, his eyes filled with worry. Bucky cursed inwardly as he glanced back to see Sharon in the distance turning and leaving with her cousin Peggy close in tow. He wondered how much they had heard or seen. He knew it wasn’t his fault, but he still felt the burning shame of embarrassment for essentially ruining the engagement party with his drama.

Sam was trailing behind the blonde alpha, also looking alarmed.

“I’m fine, Steve. He didn’t hurt me or anything.” Bucky waved his hand and the left stub of his arm where his jacket was pinned as Steve rushed to him. “Shows over, so can we get back to the party?” The omega knew he still wasn’t fully right in the head, but he didn’t want to leave when this was an important night for his best friend. As the best man, he felt like he had an obligation to support him.

“You’re not okay. I can smell it on you.” Steve persisted. “If you need to leave, I completely understand. Your health takes precedence-“

“For _fucksakes_ , can we move on? I know Brock has a temper, which you made worse, by the way, but he didn’t _hurt_ me. I need to go apologize to Sharon.” He gestured behind Steve where Sharon had made her exit.

The blonde was just as stubborn as him. “No, you need to take it easy right now. Go rest for a while until your nerves settle. Here, we can go sit by-“

Bucky pushed past him, “I’m not some delicate doll, Stevie. I’m okay.” He turned back to Natasha, who was now standing with Sam while Riley dealt with the disgruntled car owner. “I’m going to talk with Sharon. I’ll see you all in there. Thank you for looking out for me, but I need to make amends first.”

He hastily retreated up the terrace, leaving his friends behind as they exchanged worried looks. Natasha had her arms crossed in disappointment as she stared levelly at the blonde.

Steve blushed, “Look, I know I didn’t help to diffuse the situation, but Brock was being a complete asshole. Brock was grabbing at him!”

“So you antagonize the drunk, angry, possessive alpha? Christ, Steve, no wonder the guy was all steamed up. You were _challenging_ him.” Natasha countered.  “Challenging an _inebriated_ alpha whose potential mate is pregnant. Thank about it.”

It hit Steve then what he had been doing, that he had been unconsciously propositioning the older alpha for a fight. All at once, he felt uncomfortable and ashamed of himself for making the situation worse. He looked back in the direction his best friend had went, feeling conflicted and guilty.

“I know you’re trying to protect Bucky and your pups, but you made it worse. Are you _sure_ you’re okay with him being pregnant while you’re still engaged to Sharon? Because what just happened sure as hell wasn’t well thought-out.” Natasha never missed a beat in attempting to dig at the root of all of their problems.

Hearing someone voice their own double guessing of his relationship status struck a nerve.

Steve was frowning as he stated, “I love Sharon and I made a vow to her. We’ve been through a lot together; we can get through this.”

“Have you _told_ her about your predicament with Bucky?”

“I was going to once I had time to process this… I just found out yesterday that I’m for sure the father. I know I want to be a dad, but I need to break this news to Sharon carefully. It changes things, and I’m scared, Nat.”

The redhead shook her head in frustration, “Imbeciles.” She stalked away, presumably to join up with her own mate to ground her frustrations.

Sam patted Steve’s shoulder in reassurance. “You may not have handled everything in the best way, but you were in defense of a friend. How about we take some deep breaths and cool off the pissed alpha smell before we find your fiancé, yeah?”

Steve visibly deflated, shoulders sagging. He prayed that Sharon hadn’t witnessed too much so that they could instead talk about their predicament at home. He knew he should’ve told her right when Bucky even had an inkling that the twins might be Steve’s, but he had been afraid and awestruck by the revelation; too frozen in shock to do anything.

Unfortunately for Steve, he wasn’t aware that Brock had interacted with his fiancé.

*

Bucky caught up with Sharon just outside of the main dining room, his shoes nearly skidding on the polished floors when he almost lost balance. From time to time, he would lose his footing as he adjusted to the distribution of weight without most of his left arm. He wasn’t wearing a prosthetic, which typically threw him for a loop when his mind was already a jumbled mess.

 He tried to compose himself the best he could. The blonde woman ahead of him looked gorgeous in her cobalt blue tea-length dress, speaking in hushed tones with her cousin. Peggy noticed the other first and brightened as Bucky approached. Despite the smile, Bucky could still scent the undertones of annoyance and disbelief in the women.

Peggy had known Bucky for a few years now, having met her mate Angie through Bucky’s sister Becca in college. The woman had moved to New York for college and had stayed put since. She was a spitfire whom Bucky always enjoyed conversing with. Her mate, Angie, was no different. Seeing Peggy beside her cousin calmed some of Bucky’s fears, as he knew the fellow brunette would do her best to deescalate a situation and appeal to her cousin’s good graces.

“Are you okay, James?” Peggy asked at the same time Sharon looked over to him, surprised to see him standing upright.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that. I wanted to apologize for the argument. I didn’t mean to cause a scene.” Bucky was still slightly shaken from it all, but he was pressing on as if he was in a battle zone and had to complete a mission. In the back of his mind, he knew he should’ve taken Natasha’s offer to leave, but he was persistent and wanted to set things right.

Sharon seemed to sense his hurt, her brows knitted in concern, “Are you sure you’re all right? Brock was exceptionally pissed off.”

The omega offered a small smile, “Brock is a hot head. I’ll be okay.”

The two women didn’t look convinced.

“So is what Brock said true?” Sharon was straight to the point, throwing the other off guard.  

Bucky reddened, assuming his (ex?) boyfriend had run his mouth to Sharon too about their twins. “Uh-yeah. Yeah, I am pregnant.”

“Congratulations.” Sharon lifted her wine glass, nodding towards the brunette omega. Bucky fumbled with an embarrassed thank you, but Sharon cut his sentence off, “-and they’re Steve’s, right?”

Bucky’s words died off, his eyes peering into Sharon’s like a deer in the headlights. Peggy’s brows were nearly to her hairline as she turned her back to the pair, giving the illusion of privacy even though they were in the lobby where _anyone_ could hear them.

“ _Right_?” Sharon prompted again.

Defeated and tired of lying, Bucky nodded his head in weary confirmation.

The blonde frowned as she came in front of the other, her lowered voice seething, “You’re an _asshole_ , James Barnes. Why didn’t you both _tell_ me? Did you want to _humiliate_ me? Is that what you had planned for your _toast_?”

“Jesus Shar, no!” Bucky wanted to be just as frustrated, but he knew he had to keep his head level when faced with the other omega and her own games. “We took a paternity test just to be sure- we got the results yesterday, ok? Trust me, this is _not_ what I wanted. I want to be with my _boyfriend_ , not your fiancé.”

“Is he even still your boyfriend?”

“Fuck- I don’t know, but Steve made this whole situation worse by pissing him off. Look, I’m sorry the truth spilled out this way but I’m still processing this as well. This situation sucks, but it’s not Steve’s fault. We both fucked up, okay?”

Sharon was shaking her head, amazed that Bucky was trying to cover for his and Steve’s asses, “That is such bullshit _,_ James Barnes.”

“Steve loves _you_ , okay? Yeah, I’m knocked up with his kids, but it doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t change that he wants to be with you.” The words soured in his stomach, his heart clenching as he continued to speak, “If anything, this will be Steve’s chance to be a dad and the two of you can carry on with your marriage. We’ve all always been family, right? These kids will- they’ll keep Steve off your back about having kids, ok? I could be like a surrogate-”

Peggy was giving Bucky a strange, quizzical look as she glanced back at the pair, obviously troubled by what he was saying to the blonde.

Bucky knew he was playing down his own feelings in favor for someone else’s happiness. He knew that what he was doing probably wasn’t healthy, but he couldn’t live with himself if he ruined the engagement party and the upcoming wedding of his best friend. He didn’t want Steve to lose his lover and feel guilt-driven to help Bucky.

He didn’t want Steve’s pity.

 “So- Can we be a family? Work through this?” Bucky asked, desperate.

Sharon was still glaring at him with unwavering annoyance. She appeared composed as she tampered down her own emotions, but he could see the fires of hell in her eyes. The blonde omega was a strong woman and had fought hard for both her career and her way through life; she wasn’t about to roll over and show her belly to anyone.

Bucky wanted to hate her, but he couldn’t help but to admire this woman who reminded him so much of Steve and Natasha.

“Sharon? The caterers are ready to serve dinner. We’re seating everyone now.” Sharon’s mother approached her daughter from around the corner. She was just as good-looking as her offspring; tall, light blonde haired pulled into a tight bun, with a face that had aged gracefully.

“We’ll discuss this later.” Sharon stated coolly, dismissing their conversation before turning to follow her mother inside the main dining hall.

Peggy stayed behind, sighing and shaking her head as Bucky tried to process the interaction and straighten his appearance out.

“This is all very entertaining, but my god, what were you and Steve _thinking_?” Peggy groaned, “You have quite the hole to dig yourselves out of, don’t you?”

“Tell me about it.” The brunette’s voice was lax, worn-out.

Peggy looked him over and helped him adjust his tie. “Listen James, I adore you but you shouldn’t speak lowly of yourself to make others happy. You deserve happiness, too. Please know that.”

She kissed his cheek lightly.

Bucky could only offer her a grim smile as she held out her arm and escorted him into the dining hall to group up with the other wedding party where he was (thankfully) not seated next to the bride or the groom.

*

Ten minutes into the first course found Winifred over to kiss the top of her son’s head and checking in on him conspicuously. She discreetly scented him in a way a mother only knew so as not to mortify her son. Bucky didn’t have the heart to brush off his own mother and instead turned to offer her a small greeting. The other members at his table snickered, for they knew Winifred couldn’t help but to dote on all of her children.

“You should be eating your salad, ma.” Bucky stated as he set his fork down.

“I noticed that Brock left. Everything all right? I heard you two were in a squabble outside.” Winifred asked in hushed tones.

“He drank too much so he took a cab home. You know how it is.” Bucky reached forward and grabbed his sparkling apple cider, sipping on it to try and rid the bitter taste of failure from his mouth. He hated admitting that his boyfriend was struggling with alcohol again; he hated it even more that he was likely a part of the cause for Brock’s drinking.

Winifred was sympathetic, “I’m sorry, James. I just wanted to check in on you.”

Bucky shrugged, “I know…thanks, ma.”

There was an excited glint in his mother’s eyes that formed in the glazing of tears. Bucky looked to her questioningly as she quickly wiped them away, “It’s the menopause, making me overly emotional again. I’m just so excited about-“

“Ma!” Bucky reddened.

“Oh! They’re serving the main course! I’ll chat with you later.”

Bucky watched his mother scamper off to the loud Barnes table where his whole family was seated. With three sisters, a brother-in-law, and a nephew, they did very well in taking up enough room to draw some attention. The omega quietly longed to sit with the comfort of his own blood, but the wedding party was having enough fun exchanging jokes. He could settle on drowning himself in the familiar chatter of his friends instead.

Blessedly, he was sitting between Wanda and Peggy. Around them sat Sam, Tony, Thor, Clint, Janet, Natasha, and Maria. It was all of the main wedding party and the buzz of excitement was palpable in the air. Of course, a few words were exchanged about Bucky and his fight with Brock in the parking lot, but he did his best to play it down and offer a nonchalance answer as if everything was okay.

Everything was _not_ okay.

Especially when Bucky glanced at the table behind them where Steve and his beautiful fiancé were sitting with Sharon’s parents and grandparents, and Steve’s mom, step-dad, and grandmother. Sharon looked picture perfect with her hand set on Steve’s. Whatever anger and resentment Sharon felt for finding out about Bucky and Steve’s situation was put on the back burner as she kept the peace in favor to mark all as content.

 A fairytale romance to any onlooker, though Bucky knew better.

Sharon was just as good as Natasha when it came to schooling her face and acting as if nothing was wrong. Remembering the embers in her eyes almost an hour ago told Bucky otherwise. He knew this wasn’t going to be the last of it, nor should it be.

He had meant what he said that they could all be a family together.

He just wanted Steve in whatever capacity he could have him; as long as Steve was happy.

Not wanting to dwell on sallow thoughts, he ate at his food and did his best to put on a happy façade for the good of the table. He was surrounded by many of his favorite individuals in the world, which was a miracle considering how much his heart hurt.

He just wished he didn’t feel so alone with his thoughts.

*

Peggy made the first toast, keeping it short and sweet on how she was helping Sharon to avoid any Bridezilla-tendencies. She followed up with a sweet story on how they used to pretend they were getting married to imaginary partners and Sharon would always insist on going over every detail; from what she would wear to the flowers.  Peggy joked that while she was more interested in marrying her childhood crush Xena, Sharon had always shown a tendency for male hero types and that it was no surprise she found Steve, who fit that role entirely. 

Each bridesmaid said something along the lines of their excitement for the couple or a few words of advice for the upcoming months. The groomsmen did much the same, but Bucky began drowning out their words as the mic got closer and closer to him. He had his speech written out on two notecards, ready to go, but he was having trouble swallowing the lump that formed in his throat.

He continued to sip water and sparkling apple cider, feeling sweating and clammy as Sam began to finish up his speech.

When he handed the omega the mic, Bucky faked the best smile he could and stood up, completely forgetting that he needed one hand to hold the mic and another to hold the notecards.

His first words accidentally reached the mic as he muttered a nervous, “Ah, Shit.”

A few murmur sand chuckles reached the crowd from people who knew him, and Bucky did his best not to falter. He left the notecards on the table and chuckled anxiously, “Well, I thought I was missing something.” He waved his left arm, causing a few giggles in the crowd with the people who knew Bucky’s sense of humor best. He glanced around as he heard the definite sound of Becca’s snort. “Sorry about that. Well, I had this speech written out, but my ma always said the best things come from the heart.”

He looked over to Steve, who had an embarrassed but soft smile on his face. His eyes were so blue and earnest, that the omega had to shift and look away in order to not get lost in them. He didn’t want to get overly emotional.

“Steve moved across from me when we were 5. I remember this toe-headed, pint size little punk that would stand up to the meanest bullies in the neighborhood without any regard for his safety. I thought he was crazy, until one day he stood up for my little sister Anna at Sunday school. He helped keep a bully off of her when I wasn’t there to protect her. Even with a bloodied lip and a bruised eye, he brushed off his heroic feat as just ‘the right thing to do’.  From that point on, he became a brother to me. He became family.” Bucky cleared his throat, wishing for the tightness in his chest to go away.

“Steve and I have been through all the best and worst milestones together; first broken arms, asthma attacks, bee stings, hospital visits, black eyes, crushes, detention, playing hooky- sorry ma- traffic tickets...the list goes on.”

What went unsaid in the back of his mind was the recovery he went through when he came back from the military- the pain and loss of his arm, his sanity, and his slow rehabilitation. He remembered the long radio silences when he was forced to be away from his loved ones for missions in the Middle East. He didn’t share how he had a picture of Steve in his pocket beside his family and how those images grounded him when he wasn’t sure if he’d live to see tomorrow.

. He didn’t talk about how he had tried to kiss Steve when he was on shore leave at 20, only to find out Steve had a girlfriend.

He didn’t talk about their one night stand or the twins that grew steadily in his womb.

This wasn’t about him.

“When I first met Sharon, I thought she was a hell of a woman. I also thought...how did our favorite meatball muster the nerve to ask her out, much less snag such a classy dame? It became apparent soon that she was the one for him. She was the right-“ Bucky cleared his throat again, his stomach clenching. “She was the right dance partner for you, Rogers.”

If anyone looked hard enough, they could’ve seen the flick of recognition that went across Steve’s face. A distant memory, but a strongly sentimental one as his face softened with emotion. Bucky made eye contact with him for a split second, but looked away. 

“I’m proud of you, Stevie. I wish you both all of the happiness and love forever can bring. I’m looking forward to the next few months ‘til the wedding. Cheers.” Bucky set the mic down and grabbed his cider, raising it as the echo of ‘cheers’ flooded the room. Before he could make eye contact again with the happy couple, he sat down, gray blue eyes looking to the table cloth.

“You got me crying, jerk.” Wanda whispered beside him, running her finger underneath her eyes to avoid smearing her mascara.

The brunette let on an amused chuckle while he refused to turn around to see the look on Steve’s face.

He downed the rest of his cider.

*

After the speeches, there was more mingling as people waked around with their desserts and chatted. Bucky spoke for a while to his family while trying not to blush every time Becca and his mother looked to his stomach and then to him knowingly. It was hard to keep it a secret in front of his dad, but George was too caught up in the merriment of the engagement party to notice his son’s discomfort.

Becca walked with him to the drinks table and reached over to squeeze his right hand. “You’re a great actor, brother.”

The omega bristled, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I know you’re bothered with what happened with Brock. Mom told me he’s drinking again.”

Bucky’s mouth pressed in a thin line at the sore subject.

“Just know that whatever happens, you’re going to be a great parent. And you have us, by the way.”

“They’re twins, and if they’re going to be anything like you and I, God help me…we’ll need a village to raise them.” He added in exasperation.

Becca smiled mischievously, “So much payback. I thought I had enough with Jack being born, but you having two…damn. Jack is going to be very excited when he finds out he’ll have cousins.”

The thought of his nephew was enough to soften the butterflies in his stomach. His sister placed her arm around his waist and rested her head lightly on his shoulder, wrapping him in the scent of family and safety.

However, the scent shifted as Steve approached him.

Becca greeted the blonde alpha giddily with a tight hug and a pat on the cheek. “Stevie! My favorite artist. I’ surprised your blush went away after all of those speeches. Tony’s story was a riot.”

Steve’s ears pinked at the mention of the rowdy omega’s story of the time he and Steve had a run-in with the law during college. Bucky had heard the story many times before...it included some public indecency, trespassing on private property, and thievery that was enough to give Sharon’s father an acrid look and a few more gray hairs as he listened.

“Luckily he didn’t tell the _whole_ story, or else we might’ve been arrested again.” Steve confessed.

“It’s a good story.” The brunette omega chimed in. He watched Steve with carefully guarded eyes over his glass.

“I wanted to thank you for the speech, Buck. It was good.”

“The joke was the best.” Becca smirked. “I love it when my brother makes people uncomfortable.”

Bucky glared at his sister, “You’re the biggest punk of them all, Becs.”

Becca giggled and saluted the both of them as she moved her way towards Peggy and Angie. The alpha and omega watched her go in silence, both of them feeling a level of discomfort now that they were somewhat alone together.

“I wanted to apologize for my behavior with Brock. It was wrong of me to butt into your relationship, but I thought I meant well at the time.” Steve was sure to keep his voice low as they spoke.

“Was it Nat or Riley that helped you pull your head out of your ass?” Bucky grumbled. “I accept the apology, but your fiancé knows and she’s not too pleased.”

“I know. She and I will be discussing when we get home.” The taller blonde ran his hand down his face, looking more tired than his twenty seven years. “We should’ve been honest with everyone from the start, Buck. We made a damn mess.”

The omega looked to the ground in solid agreement.

“How about from this point forward, we are completely honest with everyone and with ourselves? I know I need to work on communicating better and I want it to start with this. No more secrets or lies.”

Bucky looked up to him pointedly. “Are you asking me to pink swear on that?”

Steve held out his left pinky earnestly.

The omega’s stomach clenched as he reached across with his right pinky and shook with his best friend.

“Honesty, so help us god.”

“God help us, jerk.” Bucky added.

The alpha reached in and brought the older man in for a hug. It was an apology and a promise rolled up into one, and Bucky was too weak to refuse it. He took in the familiar scent of the father of his pups and tried to let go of the anger and disappointment he felt for the night. He was still upset with Steve, but he wasn’t about to burn an olive branch when it had been extended to him. Especially when everything felt like it was on fire and getting worse.

Steve still wanted him in his life and was willing to jump through hoops of fire to keep the peace.

Bucky could at least appreciate Steve’s good intentions.

He just wished life would work like it did in the fairy tales.

*

By the time he had finished his fourth flute of cider (and bathroom trip and faked enough smiles to hurt the muscles in his face, he decided to sneak out. He gave Natasha and Clint a heads up while making it very clear that he wanted some time alone to process the night. Natasha understood and Clint went as far as to walk with him out to the street to hail a cab.

Once in the taxi, his heart weighed heavy on his situation. He didn’t have the energy to say goodbye to Steve and Sharon, as the unfolding future itself felt sour in his stomach. He was worried about his relationship with Brock now that the alpha knew the truth of the situation.

The truth…

He would have to tell his family tomorrow, as was expected by his mother.

The omega would have to eventually tell them the parentage as well…about how he had made a mistake and had ruined what was left of his long-running relationship with Brock while pining for someone he couldn’t have.

Feeling suddenly nauseous, he had the cab driver pull over abruptly so that he could open the side door and vomit out into the street.

*

_ Then _

“1…2…3- ouch!” Bucky groaned when again his foot was trampled on by the clumsy blonde in front of him.

“I thought you were going left!” Steve whined, moving back from his friend as he scratched the back of his neck in embarrassment.

“Maybe we should do the left-right-left-left-right…” the brunette grumbled as he shook out his foot. He took in a dep breath and straightened out. “All right punk, let’s try this again.”

They were fourteen years old and preparing for their first formal dance in high school. They had gone to middle school dances when they were younger, but Bucky was sick of seeing his friend be a wallflower amongst the other nervous students. He wasn’t going to allow Steve to slink in the shadows and miss out on the fun.

He had been practicing for the better part of two hours in Steve’s bedroom. Bucky was sure to school him on different types of dance, depending on the music genres he picked. With two sisters who were actively in dance, Bucky had been dragged to enough performances and had helped his sisters rehearse enough times from home that he was as sure-footed as the best performers.

Teaching Steve was a definite labor of love, as Steve had grown a whole foot over the summer and was clumsier than ever. He was now the same height as Bucky, but he was all thin lean muscle as his body worked to bulk up and catch up with his growth spurt.

He also smelled heavenly up close, which was something the brunette wasn’t about to admit out loud. He wasn’t sure why Steve’s scent made him a little giddy inside.

“I gotta say, you’re a quick study once you put your mind to it.” Bucky smirked. “I guess you _can_ learn new tricks. Why’d you ever wait this long to try?”

Steve seemed shy. “I guess I was just waiting for the right dance partner.”

Bucky playfully punched at his shoulders, “Hey now, save your sweet talking for Molly Smith. _She’s_ the one you’re trying to woo, remember?” The other teenager was looking to him strangely, causing Bucky to redden and breakaway from the hands on his waist and shoulder, “Listen, it’s getting late and my ma will kill me if I stay past 9 again. Catch you in the morning?”

“Yea, absolutely, Buck.”

Steve walked him out, thanking him bashfully.

*

Unfortunately, Bucky never made it to the high school dance. He awoke the next morning with a high fever and soaked sheets where the aroma of an omega’s first slick hung heavy in the room. He remembered sobbing into the pillowcase as his mother ran her hands down his back to soothe his pain and shame.

It was a surprise to all when he had presented as an omega, as he had assumed all of his life that he would be an _alpha_ just like his dad. Finding out that he was a different designation was distressing enough, but dealing with his first heat had been excruciating, confusing, and embarrassing. His parents were both incredibly supportive through it all in providing him with fresh sheets, clothing, food, and medicine; though all he wanted to do was hide under his bed covers and take scent and heat suppressants for the rest of his life.

He knew some of the students at school would make fun of him for being an omega. He felt embarrassed now knowing that his biology looked like the horrifying diagrams he had seen in heath class. Knowing he would now have to take the Omega health class worsened the torture as then _everyone_ would be aware that Bucky Barnes was not an alpha.

He wondered if his alpha friends would ostracize him now that he had presented as a _breeder._

A _bitch_.

It wasn’t allowed to use derogatory terms or discriminate against others due to their designation, but Bucky had heard it enough times in the locker rooms to know that high schoolers were sometimes a cruel bunch.  He knew this wasn’t the end of the world and that it didn’t change who he was, but he had a hard time accepting that it was a _part_ of him now.

He spent his first heat between sobbing and sleeping in bed. No consoling words from his parents or sisters could change what he was.

*

He found out later on after his first doctor’s exam at the omega clinic that his heat had been triggered by the scent of an alpha.

It came as no surprise that Steve went into his first rut a week later.

*

_ Now _

The sound of his phone beeping caused groaning from the rumpled haired brunette as his right hand shakily fumbled to find the offending device. It was still dark in his room and he cursed as his phone brightened to inform him it was 6:00 am.

There were three voicemails from Brock, all of which became apparent he had been drinking more and more steadily through the night.

Voicemail 1: _1:13am- I trusted you and you went behind my back and fucked that goddamn Boy Scout. I should’ve known a bitch like you would look for any cock he could get. You’re a shit stain, Barnes, for not being man enough to tell me the truth!_

**Message deleted.**

Voicemail 2: _3:03am – You know what kills me? I wanted to marry you. I wanted to do good by you. I should’ve known…Bitches only ever break your god damn heart. You took my kindness and played me. Well done, you piece of shit-_

**Message deleted.**

Voicemail 3: _5:57am – I miss you, James. I miss you so god damn much, but I hate you. I hate what you did. I know I’m a shit person, but at least I try James. Fucking hell, I love you like the goddamn sun and you obliterated my heart. I’m sorry I hurt you, I’m sorry I’ve got these demons…but fucking shit, I still love you. _

Bucky didn’t delete the last voicemail.

He closed his eyes and set his phone on his chest, feeling sick and dread crawl through his system. He didn’t care about the name calling and hurtful things the older alpha had said. All he clung to was that Brock loved him and was hurting.

He knew his relationship was far from healthy with Brock, but they had been through so much together that he wasn’t sure that he wanted to give it up.

He knew it wasn’t healthy, but he had never claimed to be perfect or right in the head when it came to his romantic relationships.

*

Clint was making eggs and bacon when his brunette roommate finally decided to resurface. The beta offered a friendly good morning, waving his spatula with a salute as he turned back to his task at hand. The shower was running in the bathroom, evidence that Natasha had beat him to it.

Bucky sat at the kitchen table and carded through the magazines littering the table top.

“You sleep okay?”

Bucky shrugged as he remembered the dream about his past. The dance, his first heat…He let out an exhale. “Mostly, yeah. Brock left me a few voicemails.”

Clint stiffened. “What’d he say?”

“He’d been drinking, so he sounded pretty belligerent. Said some stupid things, but he did say he sorry in the last one. At least, mostly an apology for what he’s capable of.”

“Are you guys through?” the beta tried to keep the edge of hope out of his voice. Bucky still caught on, though he wasn’t surprised since Clint hadn’t liked Brock ever since he first heard the couple arguing fiercely with one another.  

“I don’t know. Probably?”

Clint shut off the stove and faced his friend. “I understand that you both have a lot invested in one another, but please don’t let him manipulate you. Last night was crossing a fine line between arguing and abuse.”

“Clint…”

“I know you’re obstinate and going to do what you want, but that’s all I’m going to say. Now then, try to eat some breakfast. You need the protein _and_ you’re eating for three.”

Bucky huffed, “Don’t remind me. I still don’t know how I’m going to do this one handed.”

“Did anyone ever tell you that your jokes are terrible?” Clint exhaled.

“My jokes are hilarious and you know it.” Bucky accused.

The beta raised his hands in a placating gesture while he took a seat across from the other and began chowing down. Natasha came out in her bathrobe to join her two favorite men while they debated on Bucky’s sense of humor.

Any mentions of Brock or Steve were left off the table.

Bucky didn’t want to give himself morning sickness.

*

Clint offered to accompany Bucky to his parent’s home, but the omega was stern and resolute that this was something he needed to do on his own. He didn’t own a car, so he took the long routes of the subway and streets to get to his home. The hustle and bustle of the city and the familiar concrete paved streets always did wonders to calm his nerves and quiet his head.

He felt grounded and at ease by the time he made it to his parents’ home. His youngest sister Joy was sitting out on the steps with her pet rabbit Frank.

“Hey Buckter!” Joy greeted brightly. She had pixie short brown hair and the same gray-blue eyes as her brother. She was sixteen years old, but would always be the baby to Bucky. She had been a definite ‘surprise’ child of her parents and had grown up wild and stubborn like herolder twin siblings.

Bucky smiled and leaned down to rumple her hair. She groaned and tried to straighten it. “How’s it shakin, bacon?” he asked.

“Mom is acting crazy. She pulled out your baby album this morning and her and Becs have been looking through it for forever. Are you dyin’ or somethin?”

“Nah, nothing like that.” The omega chuckled.

“Where’s Brock?” she stood up with Frank in her arms and looked around. The white and brown spotted, floppy eared rabbit lay patiently in her embrace.

Bucky shrugged, “He’s not coming.”

Joy didn’t pester him for more information. It was a blessing that she wasn’t being nosy.

“Well, mom made you snickerdoodles. If you move fast, you can get some fresh out of the oven.”

“Why didn’t you say so!?” Bucky made haste to enter the house and was assaulted with the different smells wafting from the kitchen. He followed his nose to the warm cookies on the rack, to which he plucked two and began devouring the first.

“Good afternoon to you too, twin.” Becca sniffed.

Bucky waved with his mouth now full of two cookies.

Winifred quickly closed the baby album like she had been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. “Hello, sweetie.”

“Joy already told me you guys have been ogling at my baby pictures.” He replied through his mouthful.

“Just getting ideas for- you know.” Becca winked.

Joy scrunched her nose at the adults and walked to the backyard to put Frank in his rabbit play-pen.

*

He broke the news at dinner, when the whole family was gathered around the dinner table (sans Becca’s husband John, who was working shift as a fire fighter in Brooklyn).

“I’m pregnant with twins.” He confessed, to which Winifred shouted with joy and George’s face brightened.

In-between Bucky and Becca, Jack hugged his uncle with excitement.

“Just like my sisters.” George couldn’t wipe the smile from his face as he looked at his son. “Is this why you’ve been acting so strange?”

“More or less, yeah. I’ve been struggling with morning sickness.” Bucky adjusted his chair as Jack pressed his hands against his slightly swollen abdomen. He didn’t look visibly pregnant, but felt more like he had eaten a Thanksgiving meal and was bloated with the evidence of it.

“So this was why mom has been acting so sentimental.” Anna, his second youngest sister, piped up. She was 22 and had just started graduate school in New York for business. She had stick-straight shoulder-length hair with bangs, and dimpled cheeks like her mother.

“How far along are you?” George questioned.

“A little over two months? Almost three? I'm still in the first trimester. I need to go to another appointment soon. My brains a little fuzzy on all the details, but I can bring you the ultrasound pics from the next appointment.”

“They call it pregnancy brain.” Becca added. “Get used to it.”

“Are you going to take those crazy baby classes where they make you breathe and do yoga poses at the same time?” Joy chuckled. “I can’t imagine Brock doing yoga.”

Bucky’s shoulders visibly sagged, “Well, we’re not exactly getting along right now.”

Anna raised a brow, “I thought he’d be over the moon that you were pregnant. He’s wanted you to move in with him for forever. You are, aren’t you?”

Bucky shook his head, “I’m not. Look, there’s no easy way of saying this, but the twins ain’t his.”

The room went quiet, save for the small sounds of Jack playing with Bucky’s spoon.

“Wh- _What_?” Becca sputtered, “ _Say_ that again?”

“I had a one night stand with a friend and they’re his, not Brock’s. So…Brock and I are currently not on good terms.”

“Holy shit!” Joy squeaked and began laughing.

“Bucky!” Anna exclaimed at the same time.

“Oh my-“ Winifred croaked. “George?”

George’s smile had disappeared and been swapped with one of concern. “So who is the father,  exactly? Are they going to be supportive in your situation? Do we know them?”

“It’s kind of a mess right now, but I promise to tell you guys when things are sorted. I’m not going to lie, I’m pretty freaked out and I regret sleeping with this friend-“ not wanting to babble on, he reigned himself in, “I’m pregnant and I’m excited and nervous. I know my situation isn’t ideal, but…it would mean a lot to me to have your support. The father of the twins is also on board, but there’s a lot of messed up stuff between us that we need to sort out.”

“Is it Tony?” Anna asked.

“Is it your ex’s, Frank’s?” Becca guessed.

“Is it _Steve’s_?” Joy teased with a shit-eating grin.

Bucky glared at her, but Winifred was already soothing the commotion. “What matters, James, is that we’re here to support you and the twins. Whatever you need, you have us.” She reached across the table and took her son’s hand.

George still looked surprised and slightly disgruntled, but he nodded in agreement as the family then began to pester the eldest son on name ideas and what he would do about living arrangements. Although his family could be over bearing at times, he didn’t take it for granted. 

*

Later that night, Bucky sent a text to Brock.

 **James B.:** Can we meet?

He had spent most of the day with his family while also texting Natasha and Sam. Even Steve had texted him to chat, but Bucky felt like he needed the break to sort his mind through. Being around his family and away from the insanity of the engagement party had him thinking about his boyfriend and where they now stood in terms of their relationship.

He wanted to speak to Brock when the alpha’s system wasn’t soaked in alcohol and anger.

Bucky also wanted to meet and talk with Steve, but he wasn’t sure what type of wrath Sharon had inflicted once the party was over and the eyes were no longer on her and Steve.

He felt somewhat guilty for leaving his best friend afloat, but he was still upset with him for goading Brock into a downward spiral of anger.

Bucky hovered over his phone for an hour, contemplating his feelings on the matter.

 **Brock:** Where at?

 **James B.:** Central Park, usual spot?

 **Brock:** Tomorrow at 6, after my shift.

 **James B.:** Ok

*

Bucky should’ve felt nervous to be around Brock after the blow up from the engagement party two days before, but if the omega had to identify any one emotion, it was that he just felt emotionally exhausted. The overall quiet static between him and his (probably ex, who knew) boyfriend was enough to tell the brunette that it was more than likely over. However, this wasn’t the first time they had gotten into a big fight and ignored one another for a few days to cool off. The only difference now was that everything was out in the open; Brock’s alcoholism, Bucky’s poor life choice, and the truth of sleeping with Steve who was the father of the twins.

Clint and Natasha refused to allow Bucky to go by himself to meet with Brock, no matter how many times the omega tried to quell their fears or talk them down. Clint accompanied him to the park and set himself up at a bench looking across to where Bucky was walking. In front of the willow tree there was a bench where the uniformed alpha sat, looking exhausted. Brock had noticed Clint’s presence, but said nothing of it as Bucky approached him.

Brock looked like hell- bags under his eyes that spoke of little sleep and an irritated twitch to his brow. The omega would’ve clamored to him and hugged him to soothe the stress away, but he had to think of the well-being of his pups and his own safety before his urges. He steeled his emotions the best he could; to think with his head and not with his heart.

“So you finally got what you wanted. Golden boy’s dick and now his pups. Life must be perfectly peachy for you now, huh?” Brock sneered.

Not one to be provoked into a fight, Bucky let the insult slide. “This isn’t what I wanted and you know that. Don’t be an ass.”

“What do you want with us, James?”

“I think we both want the same thing. To talk, clear the air, apologize. ”

Brock snorted and grinned, looking cocky and sure of himself. It was his first defense to always seem so in control of his emotions and act as if Bucky didn’t matter. Bucky would’ve been annoyed too from the other’s actions, but he knew the alpha was hurting just as much as he was.

Bucky trudged on. “I’m just going to get things off my chest first. Before anything, you deserved the truth and I kept it from you. I was afraid that you would kick me out in the beginning if you had known I slept with Steve, so I kept you in the dark until I knew for sure.”

“So just in case things didn’t work out with pretty boy, you would still have me as your back up plan, right?” Brock growled.

“You’re not an easy person when you’re upset. I was afraid you’d-“ Bucky bit his lip and looked down at the grass, feeling unexpectedly overwhelmed. Brock hadn’t physically harmed him in a long time, but he still held that fear. Even though Brock had sobbed, apologized profusely, and sought after professional help to make amends in the past, Bucky still held the fear that history would repeat itself; that Brock’s temper would be unleashed upon him. With this new situation, he wasn’t sure what would happen.

“Fuck.” Brock sighed as he seemed to process the same thoughts as Bucky. “You thought I was going to- Fuck.” Brock ran his hand through his short cropped hair in shame.

“When Steve and I had sex, I didn’t do it to deliberately hurt you. To tell you the truth, I only remember bits and pieces of it. I’m not proud of what we did.”

“But you still did it.” Brock frowned.

“We weren’t in a good place at the time, remember?” The omega wanted to forget the awful feeling of finding his boyfriend’s empty booze bottle stash after he had been doing so well with his sobriety for months. They had fought for hours until Bucky had stormed out. The next day, he had slept with Steve.

Bucky definitely wasn’t proud of his coping mechanisms.

“When I found out I was pregnant, I freaked out. I was hoping they would be yours and that we could have the family and stability we talked about, but then I went to the doctor and the conception date was off. Everything went to hell when the doctor told me they likely weren’t yours, so I asked Steve to do a paternity test just in case. I didn’t want to wait until the pups were born and drag you and Steve through the mud. I didn’t want to tell you until I knew for sure; I didn’t want you drinking again.”

“You know that wasn’t your call to make. You should’ve just been upfront with me that you had fucked Steve at the beginning.”

Bucky groaned, “I know! I know I should have and I’m sorry I screwed up. We were already in a shit situation and I was afraid it would tip you over the edge.”

The pair allowed a brief silence to pass over them while they tried to navigate through the situation. The omega had laid out everything, feeling guilty and nauseous with emotions while the alpha stubbornly kept his arms crossed; closed off.

“This is in your ballpark now. What do you want from me, James?” the alpha sighed wearily.

“I want to figure things out with you.”

Brock’s scowl deepened. “What the hell is there to figure out? You fucked your best friend, you’re pregnant with his twins, and now I’ve always been the shmuck who has been playing second fiddle to your lifelong crush.”

“Nothing’s going to happen between him and I. I’m at peace with that. We made a mistake. Would it have made a difference if I wasn’t pregnant?”

“Yes!” Brock cried out, “At least then we could’ve evened the score- I fucked someone back in April and now you got to fuck your childhood crush. One for one. But instead, you’re knocked up and carrying the evidence.”

Bucky’s cheeks burned in anger and humiliation, “You had sex with someone else?”

The alpha let out a deep sigh to try and tamper down his anger, “Since we’re being blatantly honest-yes. We were going through a dry spell because of your new meds so I fucked some guy I met at a friend’s. I don’t even remember his name. It meant nothing; only letting off some steam.”

Despite wanting to keep his demeanor cool and collected, his pregnant hormones took a twist as hot tears stung his eyes. He didn’t want to cry, but he couldn’t help it as the humiliation washed over him.

“I can’t believe you-“

“I guess we’re close to eye for an eye now, right? Look…if you weren’t pregnant, I could probably make better sense of this. However, I don’t know if I can be the type of guy who raises some other alpha’s kids because of your mistake.”

The shorter brunette had been expecting this answer. He nodded as he wiped the tears quickly from his eyes. Brock wasn’t about to tie himself down to someone who was pregnant with someone else’s pups. Brock wanted his own flesh and blood; children with his colored eyes and family features. He wasn’t going to raise any golden haired kids.

Bucky wasn’t about to ask or beg for him to stay.

He understood.

“If you want to just fuck, that may still be on the table, but I want your stuff out of my apartment. You have the spare key. Grab your shit and leave the spare on the table while I’m at my shift tomorrow.” Brock looked him over and hesitated, “I’m sorry I got wasted at the engagement party. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“You were shitfaced and Steve aggravated you into it. It wasn’t how things were supposed to go, but I forgive you.”

“I’m trying, James.” Brock sighed.

Bucky searched through his expression, brows pinched. “There’s one more thing I want you to consider…we never got pregnant when we had unprotected sex. Ever. Please go get tested…see if everything is okay with you.”

“You sayin’ my boys are broken?” Brock frowned.

“I’m saying that we had a lot of unprotected sex, even through my heats, and we never conceived. Maybe there is something wrong.” The omega shot back.

“Fuck…” Brock pressed his fingers to his eyes as he began to dwell upon that thought.

“I know this sounds fucked up, but if down the road we somehow make it through this and we want to be together, this could be our chance at a family. If something really is wrong with-, you know…”

“You still want our relationship, after all the shit we’ve put each other through?”

Bucky thought for a moment and weighted his options. Despite everything, he still cared for the alpha. He knew it wasn’t sane or healthy, but he had never claimed to be either. It was a flaw that greatly frustrated his friends and family; his ability to maneuver through the most seemingly unsavory relationships.

“Get tested first and think about it. Let’s take some time to regroup.” Bucky offered.

Brock nodded with a deep scowl. He reached out and trailed his thumb down to Bucky’s lower lip, running over it as a form of goodbye while he studied his face, committing it to memory.

The alpha’s frown deepened as he retracted his touch and turned to walk away from the omega. Bucky didn’t chase after him, but instead allowed his shoulders to sag as the burden of the situation evaporated. Despite his best efforts, tears began to irritate his eyes and leave him frustrated with emotions.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for hanging in there and for your patience! I’ve had a lot going on with work and family, so my writing schedule has unfortunately been chillin on the back burner. I am honored by your kind words and encouragement. <3
> 
> More Steve in the next chapter! :) Plus what happened between Steve and Sharon, Peggy’s words of wisdom, and some angst.
> 
> And yeah…Brock and Bucky have an extremely dysfunctional relationship, but they try to justify their attachment to one another by all that they’ve been through together. They are each others crutches, so to speak. I know they're totally not rational and it's bordering (if not outright) abuse. Mind the tags!  
> [My tumblr](http://valkyriegail76.tumblr.com/)  
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> If I didn't reply to your comment from chapter 2, I want to say THANK YOU for reading and for inspiring me to write! I love you all!!! And for those giving kudos, Thank you!! I truly am floored by the response. <3 <3


	4. Loss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loss (noun): the state or feeling of grief when deprived of someone or something of value

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: Please mind the tags! This chapter contains some graphic depictions of violence and slight body horror related to war.

For all intents and purposes, the engagement party seemed to have gone without a hitch. Most of the guests were completely oblivious of the ‘parking lot’ episode where the best man had fought with his drunken boyfriend and dented a car.

They also went unaware that the best man was pregnant with the groom’s twins.

The night repeated itself in Sharon’s mind as she tried to make sense of the scandalous information and her feelings towards Steve, Bucky, and their predicament.

It had taken time and counseling, but she had forgiven Steve for sleeping with Bucky. They had been on a break and Steve had been free to do what or whomever he wanted while they were separated. It had stung all the more that it was his best friend that he had fucked, but Sharon realized that Bucky and his own abusive relationship were on the rocks so it only made sense that the two would gravitate towards one another in the face of their mutual separations.

She had begun to make peace with the fact that Steve and Bucky had fucked, had gotten it out of their system, and that Steve was still choosing to be with her.

Sharon thought the whole affair would end there and hoped that years down the line, the three of them could possibly laugh about it when they were old and gray.

When Steve was undoubtedly _her_ mate and had no loose ties.

Bucky’s pregnancy fractured all of Sharon’s hard work to accept the fellow omega in their life for who he was; Steve’s best friend (who also happened to be a handsome omega).

The pups would mean that Bucky had a permanent, more intimate relationship with Steve than what Sharon was currently comfortable with. The man was offering her fiancé something that she had been clear would never happen between herself and the alpha. She was firm in her belief and decision to not have children. Steve had accepted her choice and supported his fiancé to dedicate her life to her career goals and to Steve as her mate. Her line of work in the CIA was dangerous at times, and the thought of subjecting children to it didn’t sit well with Sharon.

Now, there would be children.

They wouldn’t be her own, but they would be Steve’s, and under circumstance, partly hers as well.

It was all too much to think upon, but Sharon was never one to back down from an issue no matter how large or frightening it may be.

She waited until they were at her apartment to broach the subject with the blonde alpha.

“So you’re going to be a dad? When were you planning on telling me?” She demanded as soon as she threw her winter coat on the back of the couch.

Steve steadied himself and looked to the ground in exhaustion and mild shame. He didn’t answer for a few moments as he gathered his strength to tackle the topic and pray it didn’t swiftly end their relationship.

“We just found out yesterday that I’m the father.”

Sharon crossed her arms in a defensive stance, “So when were you planning to tell me?”

“I wanted to wait until tomorrow.”

“So after the engagement party, then?”

Steve nodded with his eyes leveled to hers. She was challenging him and the alpha wasn’t about to back down from telling the truth.

Sharon fumed, “Did you think I was too _delicate_ to handle the information?  Why didn’t you tell me as soon as you knew?!”

Steve’s face contorted into a grimace as his brow set into a heavy scowl. “I’m still processing the fact that I’m going to be a _dad_ , Shar! Did you ever think that for once, my decision to wait wasn’t just about you?”

“We’re supposed to be in this together, Steve.”

“I agree with that, but this is obviously more complex. This isn’t just casual news. I needed time to process. I just found out that I’m going to be the father of _twins_ with my best friend, despite the fact that I reserved myself to think I sacrificed having a family to _be_ with you!”

Sharon scoffed, “How _noble_ of you.”

“Please don’t be condescending.” He shot back. “No one intended or wished for this to happen. I’m going to be a father and if that’s something you can’t handle, then-“ he sat down on the couch and smoothed his hands over his face, “-you need to reevaluate what you want. Bucky intends to keep the pregnancy and I plan to be there for him and my kids as much as I can.”

Sharon rubbed at her right temple to calm her nerves and steel her heart. No matter how upset she was, she knew that giving into anger wouldn’t progress them to any positive ground. She loved Steve and punishing him by hating on Bucky and the situation didn’t serve to resolve anything. Sharon knew she struggled with her temper, just as much as her husband to be did. She couldn’t help but to imagine that Bucky must be the tiniest bit pleased that he now had her alpha’s assured attention and care in the form of his pregnancy.

A passing twinge of defeat echoed through her body.

“So what do you want, Steve?”

The alpha looked troubled, “I don’t want to lose either of you. You know that I love you and I’m willing to do what I can to help our relationship. However, I need to be there for Buck and the pups. I want to be a good father.”

“How?” Sharon exhaled, “How the hell do you propose this will work? I’m so god damn _angry_ with the two of you…”

“I still respect your choice to not have a family, but you’ll have to acclimate to this change if you want to still be with me. You know this is important to me and I’m not backing down from being a father. ”

Sharon conceded, “If this is to work, there will have to be clear-cut, written out boundaries. I don’t want to be the primary caregiver for these kids. ”

“ _My_ kids.” Steve was quick to interject. “Our kids, if we can make this work between the three of us.”

“This is so fucked up, Steve. You can’t deny that, can you? Bucky is going to be standing pregnant at _our_ wedding, or be present with your kids and people will _know_. What are they going to think of us? What kind of start to a marriage will that be?”

The blonde alpha heaved a sigh and shook his head, “These are my kids, my family. Fuck what everyone else thinks. All I care about is you and Bucky.”

“Are you in love with him?” It wasn’t the first time she had brought up the subject.

Steve pursed his lips.

“I can tell he’s in love with you, Steve. Anyone with eyes can see the way he looks at you. I’ve turned a blind eye to it since I knew you loved me, but this? This is way outside the boundaries. I’m sure he’s ecstatic over the fact that he’s essentially _ensnared_ you into something more with him.”

“He didn’t-“

“I know he comes as a package deal with you, but I want you to seriously consider what you’re asking of both of us. For him, and for me. I can’t stomach the thought of him being the best man at our wedding while he’s pregnant with your pups. Call me cold-hearted, but I know what I can and cannot handle. If you want to move forward, I think the first right step would be to ask Sam to step up as your best man. That would at least be one less slap to my face and dignity, as well as my family’s.”

Steve’s face was reddened with frustration and indignation. After a moment to unite his thoughts, he replied, “You know I could never do that to him.” He rose from the couch and looked across at his fiancé, “You need to think about what you want and are willing to handle, just as I need to do the same. Bucky is _family_ and I would never purposefully hurt him. I love you and I respect you Shar, but I don’t turn my back on family.”

His intended mate fumed, “Then I guess we’re at a standstill until you think of a better alternative.”

“I need time to think.” The alpha gritted his teeth.

“You do that. Tell me how that goes for you when you pull your head out of your ass.” Sharon turned her back to him and made her way to the bedroom.

Steve left without another word to venture out into the cold New York City streets alone with his thoughts and emotions.

Sharon made no effort to follow him.

The alpha knew that for all intents and purposes, most people would see him as the bad guy. He had knocked up his best friend. He hadn’t told his fiancé what was going on the second it even became a possibility that he could be the father to Bucky’s twins when he should’ve told Sharon from the start. However, in his defense, this wasn’t just run of the mill news.

_He was going to be a father._

For so many years, he had accepted the circumstance that by being with Sharon, he would never be a father. He was willing to give that up to be with her. He was settled with focusing on his own career and attending to his mate the best he could. He left the image of children and living with the standard nuclear family and family dog for nothing but daydreams.

Now, his world had been turned upside down and he felt guilty that in his heart of hearts, he was excited to be having children.

He was excited to be a parent with _Bucky Barnes_.

*

_ Then _

He knew his mother was going to kill him. He could imagine it now; the dramatic gasp, the tears, and the angry rustling that would ensue.

Bucky wondered if it was a sin to find himself laughing at the comical thoughts of his mother’s reaction when he well knew he had just signed his life away. The last time his mother had put on such dramatics was when Becca went and got herself a medium-sized lotus tattoo on her shoulder, and Bucky chose a dark red star with the outline for future metal-work shading on his left arm. (Money compliments to _years_ of saving and scheming…)

One would’ve thought the tattoos were a 24/7 invitation to summon Satan with the way his mother had groaned and scathed at her twins’ tattoos, even though Bucky knew very well that his mother had a tiny butterfly on her backside from her ‘wilder days’.

Though the paper the eldest Barnes was clutching in his hands was so much more than just ink on the body.

He had enlisted in the U.S. Army.

*

“You’re insane!” Steve’s cried out as he skimmed through the enlistment paper details with rounded eyes. “Your parents are going to kill you!”

“Pffft, they’ll deal. My grandpa will be proud.” Bucky beamed. “You’re going to send me some sweet care packages while I’m at basic, right?”

Steve groaned and shook his head, “Jesus…Your ma is gonna have a heart attack.”

The omega waved off the comment, “She has three other kids to hover over. I ain’t gonna be one of ‘em. I’m leaving the nest, Stevie!”

“You’re a real inconsiderate jerk, Barnes, ya know that?” Steve threw one of his pillows at his friend’s smug face. The alpha couldn’t stand the image of poor Winifred Barnes crying her eyes out over her son’s rash decision. Bucky was 18 and an adult, but they were barely out of high school.

“So you’re going to basic on-“

“The Monday after graduation I fly out to Oklahoma.”

“Halfway across the U.S….your mom is going to be so pleased by that.” Steve huffed sarcastically.

Bucky plopped himself down on Steve’s bed with an amused air, “I’ve made up my mind and there’s no amount of guilt tripping any of you can do to change it. I’m excited about this, Stevie. This is my chance to make something of myself.”

The alpha looked to his friend thoughtfully, “You already are somebody, Buck.”

“World class charmer?” the omega batted his eyes playfully.

The alpha snorted, “World class pain in the ass.”

“Hey! I’m a service man now, punk. You’ve got to show some respect.”

“They’re going to eat you alive at basic, you know.”

“Pffft, as if. I can take on any wit or brawn.” Bucky flexed his arm muscles proudly. His hard work and practice in the youth boxing league assured him enough to brag about, but his best friend still looked over him wearily. The omega laid back on his friend’s bed. “I can handle myself.”

“I know you can. A little too well sometimes, if you ask me.”

Bucky snorted.

*

As to be expected, Winifred broke two plates, blamed their son’s enlistment on Bucky’s wish to send her to an early grave, and then proceeded to curse all the Barnes men in the family as she went outside to garden her anger away. Becca, who had also began to cry tears in frustration and rage, sprinted to console their mother while Bucky stood in the middle of the kitchen chaos.

His younger sisters Anna and Joy were at least spared from the news until late when they would get home from sports practices.

George leveled his son with a concerned look. “Mind telling me why you didn’t tell us you were considering the military? What about all of your college acceptances?”

“The army will pay for my education and I’ve got a chance to work in engineering with them. It’s a great deal, dad. I’m going to serve a few tours and then be set for life. No debt.” Bucky puffed up his chest with all the bravado a man of 18 could muster.

“There’s always a debt, James.” George’s frown was grim.

Bucky waved off his father’s comment and ignored his grieving mother and twin from outside in favor of holing himself up in his room with his papers.

Eventually his father came around to talk to him and offer some fatherly words of wisdom.

Bucky let it go over his head.

Looking back, the omega would wish he had listened carefully.

He wished he hadn’t been so proud and cocksure.

*

The first thing he was given after his arrival and assignation to his barracks was an embarrassing buzzcut and a trip to the doctor’s office.

Omegas were allowed in the military so long as they took scent inhibitors, birth control, and heat suppressants. This was all for the sake of their own safety and to allow the utmost completion of their job without the worries and stresses of biological functions. Alphas were treated much the same as they were also given implants to suppress ruts and any possessive behaviors.

After a blood test, a rather invasive exam, and some samplings, the brunette laid back on the exam table as the doctor inserted an implant into Bucky’s inner left arm. The implant would serve to suppress his scent and heats, as well as block any possibilities of conception for the next 7 years.

Bucky felt a shudder of relief as the nurse helped him to sit up. He would be nauseous and dizzy for the next two weeks as his body adjusted, but it was a price he was willing to pay now that his reproductive system wouldn’t be a detriment to his health.

He was as optimistic as an 18 year old recruit could possibly be.

It was the first time since he had presented that his designation had been wiped away and he simply became a cadet amongst many.

*

After four months he finished basic and entered into advanced training.

After an additional two months, he was given a short reprieve before going to his first assignment.

He was given five day of ‘shore leave’ to gather his bearings, let off some steam, and see his family and friends. It was a godsend and Bucky had never been so nervous to get off a plane in his life. He self-consciously ran his hand over his short, buzzed off brown hair, and wondered if he still looked as dashing as when he had left.

When he got the thumbs up from Steve and a compliment on all the muscle Bucky had gained, he couldn’t help but to stand a little bit taller and preen beside the blonde.

At least Natasha smack on the back of the head saves him from looking _too_ pleased.

*

His first tour lasted for two ½ years.

Special Ops; the Howling Commandos.

Bucky only thinks of his mission, his pack, his loved ones at home, and of survival.

Days, weeks, and months bleed fuzzy in his brain as the horrors of war welcomes him with open claws and devours him whole

*

Bucky comes home for one month of leave and realizes that Steve’s blue eyes and golden hair look more like home than anyone or any place he has ever known.

He is almost 22 when he grasps that the twinge in his chest has a name; _longing_.

_Love._

He _loves_ Steve Rogers.

Steve, who is everything good and whole in this world, is going to grad school at NYU and is dating an incredibly intelligent and hardworking woman who is all the things perfect for him.

She can match his wit and make his face light up the moment she enters a room.

Bucky would love her too, if it wasn’t for the way Steve looks at her like she hangs the sun, stars, and moon in the sky.

The brunette omega comes back from his leave a little less vocal.

A little less outgoing.

A little less like himself.

He blames it on the time difference; his sleeping and eating schedules are so sideways that he finds himself wanting to sleep in all day and stay up all night tinkering on mechanics or going out to the bars to enjoy some low-key drinking.

He feels out of touch with his friends and family, even though they’ve all kept in contact through emails, care packages, and photos.

Steve’s picture had been folded and stuffed alongside his picture of his family and Nat & Clint.

Always a reminder.

Bucky watches Steve and Sharon interact and smiles when his best friend asks him later on what he thinks.

“She’s a keeper, Stevie. She makes you even more of a doofus.”

Steve bites his lips and looks content. He wraps an arm around Bucky and tells him he thinks he’s in love with her. He thinks that she’s ‘the one’.

The omega ruffles his hair and tells him he’s acting like a love-struck nerd.

*

Bucky is almost relieved to depart New York for his next assignment.  

His second tour is two years long with the Howling Commandos.

It begins to feel more like home when Jim Morita claps him on the back and Gabriel Jones tells him how much he missed his ugly mug.

Dugan passes out shot glasses on the first night of camp.

They toast and down the alcohol.

Bucky feels warm again; alive.

*

His third tour was meant to be an almost four year affair.

It was his last tour, though it ended up being for reasons the brunette had no way of predicting or hoping for.

He wasn’t meant to come home until he was 27.

Twenty-two months in and he is 24 years old with a week left before his birthday. Sitting in the front of the Hunvee with Dernier cracking jokes about his birthday has the omega blushing lightly with pleased joy.

This is his pack; his brothers, his _family_.

Although they are in the middle of nowhere, the Howling Commandos still regard birthdays with the utmost joviality and do right by their pack mates in celebrating. Bucky knows he’ll get his first choice of MREs, the first shower, and possibly a beer or two if they can scrounge for it.

Jacques Dernier is in his early 40’s and has been teaching Bucky French in their spare time. He goes over the alphabet with Bucky, who does his best to speak without his Brooklyn-accent completely butchering the words. Gabe Jones sits in the back, snorting as he listens to the brunette struggle.

It’s a day like any other; mildly warm and sunny as the winter gives way to spring. They are on their way back to the main base after a successful 3 day operation. Bucky’s whole body is grimy and fatigued; though he knows it’s nothing a hot shower and meal can’t fix. He’s about to suggest a cigarette when a flash blinds his eyes and the world turns upside down.

There is a loud crash and an explosion as their Humvee is shot at from the driver’s side. He hears their screams fill the car as the vehicle is rolled several times off the road. He tries to brace himself, though he can sense the heat of fire and the crack of bone in his left side.

Dernier has stopped screaming by the time their Humvee stops rolling. Bucky is gasping for breath as his body kicks into fight or flight. He notes in horror that Dernier is dead; his head is crushed between the steering wheel and the window where the blast dented in his door and fire is beginning to lick inside of the vehicle at an alarming pace.

He gasps and inhales smoke

He can’t move.

He’s crushed.

Gabe is already frantically pulling off Bucky’s seatbelt behind him and pulling him with as much strength as his injured self can muster. He is bloodied up with gashes in his face, but they manage to crawl out from the passenger window where the sounds of yelling and gunfire fill their ears. Gabe is putting out the fire on Bucky’s arm as the brunette realizes his whole left arm and shoulder are shrouded in bright, searing pain.

“Stay with me, Bucky! Stay with me!” Gabe has tears trailing down his face as he shakily checks Bucky’s face.

Gabe drags him behind some road debris for cover. He is shaking in pain and in just as bad a state as Bucky.

Dugan finds them and takes cover. His eyes are wild.

 “What’s our situation?” Gabe questions shakily over the gunfire. There are explosions and screaming in the background.  

“Already radioed in- Three vehicles down, no backup for another 30 minutes. Men down.” Dugan explains between bouts of standing and firing. There is a slight shake to his hand that tells Bucky all he needs to know.

_They’re screwed._

Bucky can feel his head pounding louder and louder; his vision is blurry and left arm burns with an intensity he can hardly withstand. He turns to the side and vomits.  Gabe rests him against the rock, shushing him as he tries to assist Dugan in firing.

“Don’t die on me, Barnes! Don’t die on me!” Gabe yells out, though his voice feels underwater as Bucky’s breathing comes in strained. As his adrenaline wears off, he begins to realize the extent of his injuries is more serious than he thought. He can feel the struggle of breath and knows a few ribs have been bruised or broken. He prays a lung hasn’t been punctured.

He falls out of consciousness, only coming to when there is a gunshot close by and the ache of Gabriel’s aggrieved voice echoes beside him. Bucky’s eyes open as the enemy stands before them, guns pointed at them with Dugan’s body crumpled on the ground.

A bullet through the head, Dugan’s eyes look to them unseeingly.

They surrender their weapons and blunt force to the head causes both of their worlds to darken.

*

When Bucky wakes up, it is only Gabe, James Falsworth, Jim Morita, and himself in a small cell stripped of their outerwear military issued gear.

Jim is beside him in an instant, brows scrunched, “Thank fuck, we never thought you’d wake up.”

The brunette looks around and realizes the only light coming through is from a soft oil lamp outside of the cell and far away from any of their reach. He gasps in a breath as pain floods his system and the direness of his situation settles in.

“We’re fucked, aren’t we?” the brunette rasped brokenly.

Falsworth reached forward and helped the fellow omega to sit up. “They’re holding us hostage for information. You need to stay strong, Sergeant.”

Bucky moved shakily, “They can try. I’m ready to go to hell so long as I take them with me.”

*

Days bled together  Only the creeping infections and their worsening conditions told them of the time slipping away. Falsworth’s bullet wound festered while Bucky’s arm looked worse and worse with each passing day.

His left arm was irreparable; blackened at the fingertips and hanging limply where the enemy had not allowed him medical attention. He at least was able to have Gabe and Jim help him pop his shoulder back in, but his arm was far too mangled for repair as it ached and pulsed from burns and shrapnel.

Bucky prayed that his implant in the top of his arm wouldn’t malfunction. He couldn’t have the captors knowing he was an omega. He wouldn’t live through it if they sniffed him out and revealed his true designation. He knew crueler fates were in store for an omega captive.

Between bouts of wakefulness, restless sleep, and pain were the times they were dragged away one by one to be beaten and tortured.

Bucky allowed his mind to drift away from his body, fighting while also accepting impending death.

*

Their conditions worsened.

They lost Falsworth.

Bucky held the man’s head in his lap while Gabe and Jim tried to soothe him from thinking of his wounds. The infection and torture burned up his brain where he left them in a sweating mess. Bucky did his best to comfort him as he saw another one of his soldiers fade away into the horrors of war.

 _One down, three to go_. He thought bitterly.

*

There was a raid on the underground encampment one day later.

15 days in all.

Half a month.

Bucky was strapped down and barely cognizant on an exam table for another bout of torture when he heard the gunfire. He was too drugged and confused by the time someone found him that he thought he was dying. The soldier picked him up bridal style, shielding his eyes with a blanket as he pulled him from the underground hell into the light.

The brunette held on as tightly as he could, his head pounding. The only detail he remembered about the soldier was that he had blonde hair.

Later on, weeks down the road, the soldier named Johnny would visit Bucky in the hospital and smile sheepishly towards him and ask:

“You know, the whole time I carried you out of that shit hole, you kept calling me Steve. Is he your boyfriend or somethin?”

*

_ Now _

He woke up a sweaty mess with his limb throbbing and stomach roiling with familiar nausea. He rolled to the side of the bed, grabbing on to the wastebasket to wretch into it and narrowly missing all together. His head pounded in pain as he tried to banish the memories away.

While he heaved, the door opened with the familiar form of Natasha in her pajamas.

“Are you okay? You were yelling, James.” Natasha spoke sympathetically as she carefully made her way through his room to sit beside him on the bed. She rested the back of her hand to his forehead and winced. The omega was burning up.

Bucky spit out the taste of bile from his mouth. “Bad dream.” He croaked, mouth sore.

“I’m going to take your temperature. You’re impossibly hot.”

The omega didn’t have the strength to make a cheeky response to the line as the red haired alpha swiftly left the room and returned with a first aid kit. She took his temperature dutifully, all while rubbing his back.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Bucky shook his head. “Same shit.” His voice was muffled by his attempt to balance the metal thermometer under his tongue. “Always the same shit.”

The alpha hummed as she pulled back the device and frowned. “You’re running a fever.”

“I already got my flu shot.” The brunette countered.

“You’ve been stressed, James.”

Bucky grunted, “I have not.”

Even in the dim glow of the night light, Natasha’s expression was enough to cause some embarrassment over his attitude. The omega looked down to his lap and sighed, eyes closing as he leaned against his friend’s shoulder.

“So maybe I am feeling more than a little stressed out.” He conceded.

Natasha put her arm around his shoulders, “I’m going to make you some hot tea and change your sheets. You’re drenched in sweat. Change your clothes while I get the kettle going.”

The omega unquestioningly followed her directions. He took more time in the bathroom as he ran a warm wash cloth across the back of his neck and against his face. He changed into cleaner clothing and threw the old sweat-drenched pjs in his hamper.

By the time he came out of his room, he heard the soft whispers of his mated roommates in the kitchen.

“Should we call Dr. Banner?” Clint had his arms around Natasha’s waist, his cheek resting against the side of her head as she watched the kettle on the stove.

It struck Bucky as so overwhelmingly domestic that he took pause.

“Mm, if it doesn’t break, he should probably go straight to the hospital. I don’t think it’s safe in his state.” The redhead pulled the kettle off before it could screech out its completion. Clint kissed the top of her head before pulling down three mugs from the cupboard and setting them out for his mate to pour the steaming water into.

“Give it another hour at least. You know how his nightmares get.”

It struck Bucky that he felt very much like Clint and Natasha’s child instead of their longtime friend and roommate. He approached the couch quietly, feeling a soft fondness for the pair as he pulled off a clean blanket to wrap around his cold body.

“You need to stop watching scary movies before bed, young man.” Clint joked in a serious tone.

Bucky couldn’t help but to smile, despite the fact that he felt terrible. He sat down on the couch and tried to warm up. “Isn’t it past your bedtime?”

“It is, but _someone_ decided to start singing in the other room.” Clint came around with the mug of tea, still trying to make light of the situation though Bucky knew full well he had been screaming. “Next time sing _Rocket Man_ for me, yeah?”

The omega accepted the mug of ginger tea in his hand carefully while Clint took a seat beside him with his own hot chamomile tea.

“You know, in a few months we’ll be getting up for a different set of noise.” Clint motioned to Bucky’s stomach.

“I wish I could store up on sleep.” The brunette groused as he sipped on his tea. The ginger was good for calming his queasy stomach and settling his nerves. “I don’t know how I’m going to do this one handed.”

“You’re not. Between all of us, there are 5 hands. We’ll manage.” Natasha countered.

The omega chuckled, “Where would we put two kids?”

“We could always get a bigger apartment, if need be.” The alpha replied without pause. “I know the thought of moving home frightens you, so I assumed you were staying with us. We can do some baby proofing around here.”

“And we can get some baby toys.” Clint added on, “I have a friend that works at a furniture store that can hook us up with some deals on cribs. It’ll be fine.”

“You guys mean it?” Bucky responded shyly, feeling speechless by the verbal confirmation that his best friends would be helping him every step of the way. He never wanted to assume anything, but having Nat and Clint discussing the new setup for the twins was a huge wash of relief for the omega.

“We have to be the cool aunt and uncle somehow. We can’t have Becca and her mate beating us out on the title.” Clint grinned.

“I won’t tell her you said that.”

The three of them spoke about the ways they would change around the apartment and the list of items that would no doubt need to be baby proofed in the coming months. When Natasha checked his temperature an hour later, he was back within normal range. Clint set him up with new bed sheets and blankets while the omega silently thanked the gods that he at least had some things going right in his life.

For the remainder of the night, he tried to let go of the stresses of life.

He didn’t want to wrack his brain with figuring out how much maternity leave he’d get from his work, how he was going to juggle twins with one arm, if he should breast or bottle feed (if breastfeeding was even on the table- for some it was, others it wasn’t), and how he was going to supply his children with everything they could possibly need.

Instead, he rested his right hand over his abdomen and grounded himself in the here and now.

He was safe. He was loved. He was surrounded by _family_.

*

It was a few weeks after the engagement party and Bucky was busy getting his affairs in order so that he could sleep at night instead of worrying himself sick. He told Tony about his pregnancy, to which his boss/friend laughed at the idea that Bucky would think he would only get a little bit of maternity leave. Tony reassured the fellow omega that he and his twins (“The universe must hate you, Barnes.” Were Tony’s exact words.)  would be more than taken care of between their friend group and Bucky’s family. Tony was willing to work around Bucky’s schedule when he did decide to come back after a 3 month maternity leave. The option to work from home was also brought up and swiftly approved by the CEO so long as the omega felt he could juggle it all. 

With one less thing to worry about, Bucky scheduled his 14 week check-up appointment with Dr. Banner for January 23rd. He got the confirmation from Steve that the alpha would be accompanying him to see the ultrasound and talk to the doctor about his role as the father.

Before he knew it, they were already in December, and the brunette almost forgot about the upcoming holidays amidst trying to get his shit together.

He did not forget, however, about the dinner with his parents and Sarah Rogers wherein he and Steve would tell their parents about Steve’s new fatherly role.

Bucky attempted to cancel the dinner four times until Steve threatened to tell them himself. 

Over the past few weeks, the omega’s relationship with the father of his children had been improved with steady texts and the reassurance that Steve was still on board to help however he could. Bucky was not prepared for the level of overbearing best friend as the alpha began to take a more ‘active’ role in their dynamic.

It was annoyingly cute to Bucky how Steve would text him each morning, reminding him to eat or suggesting ways to cure morning sickness. He would message him articles on baby-proofing or on what size the pups were depending on the gestation week.

Although the omega knew that the blonde was weighed down with intense work deadlines and wedding/Sharon-related stress, he still found the time to call his best friend to check in on him and make himself available the best he could. The topic of Sharon stayed resolutely off the table as Steve explained that they were trying to work through their difference of opinions and find common ground. Bucky suggested all three of them meet or go to a family-counseling session, but the alpha was hesitant as Sharon was still angry with the pregnant omega.

“She knows I’m not trying to separate the two of you. We’re just trying to make a shitty situation into a more desirable one.” Bucky lamented while he and Steve sat in the back of the taxi, on their way to Steve’s mother’s house.

“I wouldn’t call this a shitty situation. Negative affirmations can negatively affect the pups, Buck. They can feel your sentiments.”

Bucky swatted at him, “What crap are you reading, now? My mom cursed Becca and I every damn day, and we turned out fine.”

Steve started laughing, to which the omega smacked his arm indignantly. “Laugh all you want, Rogers, but we’re about to face our families and their judgement.”

“They’re going to crucify us…No, they’re going to crucify _me_. You’re the sacred vessel providing my ma with grandkids, but she’s going to make me pay. Your parents, too. I’m going to leave this fiasco with my tail between my legs.”

“They can’t hurt the father of my babies. That would emotionally distress me in my delicate condition.” The omega smirked.

Steve ran a hand across his jaw, “I can’t believe we’re in this mess. Christ, one and done…I told you we should’ve worn a condom. Maybe if _someone_ wasn’t so eager for it…”

It was the first time that ‘that night’ was brought up so casually, it almost threw Bucky out of his humorous mood. He smiled secretively, pleased that they were at least to a point where they could openly joke and tease each other about it. However, it had meant so much more to him than just getting his rocks off.

“Don’t even start pointing fingers. You should’ve been the responsible one. A real gentleman would’ve pulled out!”

Steve’s face went an interesting shade of red when the taxi driver began to laugh at the pair of them. Bucky joined in on the laughter and thought the subject was done, but as they pulled up to the familiar Brooklyn neighborhood, Steve had to have the last word.

“If my memory of that night serves me well, I think it was you who had begged me to ‘shove that thick knot in me and fill me sloppy’.” He whispered loud enough for Bucky to hear, but soft enough for the omega’s blush to radiate from the top of his head to the very tips of his toes.

At least Bucky could blame his flushed appearance on motion sickness, although Steve seemed a little too smug by his recollection of their shared night.

Winifred, George, Sarah, and Steve’s step-father, William (Will for short), were all already at the house visiting with one another. It helped that the Barnes only lived a block away from the Rogers residence, just as it were when the boys were growing up.  

Sarah gave Bucky a tight squeeze and kissed his cheek as she looked him over, “Did you get sick in the car? You’re practically radiating heat.” She felt his forehead and huffed a sigh. “Those twins must be wreaking havoc with you.”

“Amongst other things, yeah.” Bucky gave Steve a side eye, but the blonde purposely kept his attention on greeting the Barnes family.

George and Winifred thought the world of Steve, and it soured the omega’s stomach when he thought of their reaction to the truth. He tried to quell his fears  and focus on the questions being thrown his way about how he was feeling, how was work, and whether he had names picked out yet. (He hadn’t even discussed the topic with Steve as they both wanted to wait until they knew the genders.)

Bucky listened to Steve share that the wedding plans were still as stressful as ever and that he and Sharon were still working through things together as a couple. It was a relief to know that the alpha didn’t try to sugarcoat things, and was honest when it came to answering questions others would shy away from.

“And how is the pregnancy going? Is everything well? Win told us that you and Brock separated.” Sarah questioned.

“Yeah, a while ago. We weren’t working out, so…yeah. It was time.” Bucky scratched behind his neck, nerves still fluttering. Steve could read him like a book and decided now was best a time as any. He reached across when Bucky’s hand came down beside him and squeezed it.

They were now gathered in the living room, waiting on the pasta to finish when Steve felt it was better to spill the truth now versus waiting any longer.

“I know we should probably wait, but I- we- wanted to meet with you all to set the cards right.”

George and Will straightened while the mothers looked on patiently.

“We found out a just before my engagement party that…well, I’m the father.” Steve confessed, “A while back, when Sharon and I were on a break, Buck and I slept together and as a result…the twins happened.”

“We were kind of drunk.” Bucky added.

The faces of their audience ranged from shock to worry to horror and confusion.

Steve winced. “We weren’t completely wasted-“

“I consented to all of it. Steve didn’t push me into it or anything. ”

The alpha wanted to face palm as each thing they said seemed to make it worse.

Bucky added on, “I thought for sure they were Brock’s since he and I reconciled a few days later, but Steve beat him to it and knocked me up.”

“Subtle, Barnes.” Steve sighed under his breath, loud enough for the omega to hear. Bucky shrugged matter-of-factly.

“So now we’re doing our best to make things work. I promise to be there for the kids and for Buck, and we want you all to know first before the news becomes public to the rest of our friends.” Steve wrapped up.

There was an awkward silence as their parents exchanged looks and glances to one another.

“So you’re still engaged to Sharon, but Bucky is pregnant with your twins?” Will clarified. “And how does Sharon feel about all of this?”

Sarah’s back was rigid with nerves as she glanced between her son and Bucky. Winifred also placed herself beside her best friend, shock of the news evident in her eyes.

The blonde alpha bit his lip, “Sharon and I are working through the details. What matters is that I fully intend to be there for Bucky and our kids. I know it isn’t going to be easy and stress-free, but you all know I love him like a brother and I want to do right by him.”

Bucky couldn’t keep his attention away from Steve, his heart thundering in his chest. He closed his mouth and tried to reign in his emotions, not wanting his family or Steve to see the open want and desire for more apparent in his face.

He loved Steve and hearing the blonde vow to take care of him was almost too much.

“Even though the circumstances are not _ideal_ …I know we will both be good parents. I know Bucky is going to be an incredible mother and I hope to support him with whatever and however he needs me.”

It was bordering on painful for the brunette to hear such unguarded pledges, when not 20 minutes before they had been casually teasing each other in the car about their hook up. He hoped that Steve would be able to stay true to what he said with little interference from Sharon, but the omega wasn’t about to let his hopes soar high.

“Oh my god.” Sarah covered her mouth, eyes brimming with tears.

“This is not what I was expecting.” William added from Sarah’s side.

“So have Sharon’s parents found out yet?” George asked. He was careful to keep his temper cool as he looked between his son and Steve. Although the desire to lecture them both bubbled in his throat, he tampered it down. Bucky and Steve were both in their later 20s. They were adults who by all account would have to figure out how to make their lives work. 

Winifred was not as reserved.

“You didn’t use protection!? I can’t say I’m not surprised you two slept together, but my gods…” Winifred marched up to Steve and poked him in the chest, “Are you ready and fully committed to support my son and grandbabies?”

A nervous and amused smile played at the corners of the alpha’s lips, “As much as Bucky will allow me to.”

“He’s already over bearing, ma.” Bucky added. “And I know he’s got dad jokes that could put Uncle Greg to shame.”

Winifred looked between the two of them and exhaled. She reached around and hugged Steve, “I’m glad it’s you that’s looking out for my son, but you’ve put yourself in quite the pickle.”

Sarah approached as well, hugging Bucky with tears flowing down her face.

“Now don’t be mistaken, I’m very upset with both of you, but…I’m going to be a grandma.” Sarah wiped at her eyes and glanced to her son, “Mark my words, Steven, I will never let you live this down.”

“Is there still going to be a wedding?” George asked grimly, still processing the news.

Steve nodded, “I’m not backing away from my vows to Sharon. This changes things and I know this is going to be difficult, but I’m going to do my best to still attend to her as well as Bucky and the kids.”

“I think you’re biting off more than you can chew, son.” George shot back. It wasn’t a cruel or sarcastic remark; it was the hard truth. “The Carters will not be as open minded as we all are.”

“You both need to be prepared for the negative backlash that will follow. You especially, Steve.” Sarah added. “You’re an engaged man and Bucky is in your wedding.”

“I can roll with the punches.” The alpha assured.

“Well, I rather it be you than Rumlow.” George confessed bluntly, “I know I can at least trust you with my grandkids and James. You don’t have as many issues as the last guy.”

Bucky reddened at the statement.

Steve’s eyes shined at the praise. It wasn’t something George was generous in giving. ‘Thank you…You know I’ll do my best to help Buck.”

“I know. But this doesn’t change the fact that this is still a terrible situation. I guess we just need to find the good where we can. My son is going to need all the help he can get.”

Emotions were running high as the two families reconciled the fact that they would both be connected now with the impending arrival of the twins. Sarah and Will were both on board, though the tension in the room was still palpable.

Steve was still engaged to Sharon, and the repercussion and negative talk that would follow would test all of their resolve. 

Bucky counted the blessings where he could. Sarah Rogers was a second mother to him, and he knew she and Steve’s step-dad would do their best to take on the role of grandparents and help him out. The grandparents all knew it wasn’t the pups’ faults for entering the world under less than ideal conditions.

It was a comfort to Bucky that amidst the mess and reality TV worthy drama, his children would never have to want for love, affection, and attention. He knew the Barnes and Rogers families would provide all of those things and so much more. He felt lucky, despite his inner worries and doubts. If anything, he could rely on his large family and close friends to help him and Steve be the best parents they could be.

When Steve looked to his watery eyes in silent questioning, Bucky waved him off.

“Hormones are a sonofabitch.” He muttered.

The blonde’s blue eyes softened perceptively.

He felt the same way.

They would weather the storm somehow.

*

Later that evening, Bucky’s phone beeped angrily at him as news of Steve being the biological father to the twins reached his three sisters.

 **Becs:** You SERIOUSLY boned your bff and never thought to tell me!? Was Steve good?? ;D

 **Anna Banana** : Mom just told us. WTF! …I’m glad it’s Steve. :)

 **JOY** : I KNEW IT! UR AN IDIOT! >:D YOU BONED STEVE! HAHAHA

The eldest Barnes wouldn’t dignify any of his sisters with a response. Instead, he buried his face into his pillow and groaned out curses to the world.

They would be pestering him the next time the family got together anyhow, so Bucky was content to ignore them in favor of getting some sleep.

His phone pinged again.

 **JOY:** I SO CALLED IT! :P Do I get $$ for guessing right?

Bucky groaned.

*

A day later, a name that had been in the very back of the omega’s mind made itself known again.

Brock’s name flashed across the phone, giving Bucky pause from where he was brushing his teeth. He spit out the toothpaste and swiped to answer.

 “Hey.” Bucky greeted, keeping his voice level, if not a little breathless. Despite the two of them having bad history with each other, there had been some good in it as well. He couldn’t let go of the good things, and thus, still felt butterflies in his stomach.

Whether they were of excitement or nerves of dread, he wasn’t sure.

They could’ve been rocks.

“So you got me thinking, and I went and got tested.” Bucky sucked in a soft breath, waiting. “My boys are fine, Barnes. Ain’t anything wrong with ‘em.” Brock answered.

Bucky wasn’t sure if this was good or bad news. He thought of all of the times Brock and him had sex without any form of protection. If both of their reproductive systems had been working in perfect order, they should’ve already had kids of their own. It caused the omega to wonder if it was indeed him that was the problem. He wondered if whatever had happened with him and Steve conceiving just happened to be a fluke.

He didn’t want to read into it.

Steve and him were possibly a compatible mating pair, but Steve belonged to _someone else_.

“Look, I put some thought into things and we ain’t good together. I love you. God, I fucking love you, James. But we’re shit to each other and you know that. Too much has happened.”

“I know…I’m not expecting anything between us. Things are too altered now.” Bucky leaned his back against the wall, brows furrowed.

Brock let out a deep breath on the other line. Bucky could hear the radio in the background and could only guess that the man was in his patrol car on break.

“Since we’re on the same page, I want you to know I’m still a bastard and wouldn’t mind fucking you, if that’s still something you need.”

The omega barked a laugh, surprised by the directness. Leave it to Brock to still be up for a lay despite of all of the unsavoriness that should’ve followed their break up.

Brock chuckled as well, deep and almost teasing. “We may be awful together, but boy do we know how to get our rocks off right together, James. If you need my services in that department, you know how to reach me. I’ve always daydreamed of fucking you when you’re round and soft.”

“You’re disgusting.” Bucky counteracted with a minor hint of fondness.

“Don’t I know it. Good luck, baby doll. Stay out of trouble so that I don’t have you spreadin’ for me for other reasons.”

“Up yours, Rumlow.” The omega bit out, “Don’t you have a job to be doin?”

There was a dark chuckle as Brock hung up on him.

The brunette took a seat at the edge of the tub and stared down at his phone.

He and Brock had dated for almost three years. He knew they were over, but he would never be able to forget what they had shared between them. A lot of bad, but there had been some good memories in there, too.

Not wanting to allow those memories to sour his mood, the omega got ready for work.

He decided to not tell Steve about the exchange.

He was better off without the two hot heads battling it out.

*

“My aunt and uncle are going to fillet you alive.” Peggy cut into her salmon meaningfully and brought up a thin slice of the fish to her perfectly red lips.

Steve gulped, not missing the reference that he could very well be like the cooked fish on her plate when the news of the pups hit the Carters.

It was the following weekend after telling the Barnes and Rogers families about the twins’ parentage. For the past few days, communication had been stilted between he and Sharon. The omega was away again on an assignment in Chicago, stating it was for the better that they take time to themselves before meeting with their relationship counselor on Monday.

Meanwhile, Steve enlisted the wisdom of Sharon’s closest and dearest cousin and friend. Peggy wasn’t shy on providing straight forward advice and taking command of situations. She was brilliant, and Steve had always looked up to her when he was in need of counsel.

The alpha felt a tiny bit bashful to think that his poor friends had heard nothing but his worries and sorrows over the past few days. He had talked Sam’s ear off, and now Peggy would hear it too.

In his defense, it was Peggy who had invited him to lunch.

“I care very much about the relationship you have with Sharon. She has spoken with me and you’ve told me your side, so I thought we could come up with a…battle plan, as it were.”

“Battle plan?” Steve echoed.

The dark haired women smiled purposefully, cunningness alit in her brown eyes, “My cousin operates best in the black and white. What you have now is quite the gray situation.” She pulled out a journal and a pen, sliding it over to Steve.

The blonde found the pages blank.  He was confused. “What do you propose I do with this?”

“The first thing I want you to do is start journaling your relationship feelings. I know, it sounds so 1700’s, but I think it will help you to identify your emotions and attitudes towards situations. I did it before I mated with Angie. I was a mess. A happy mess, albeit she turned my world upside down.” Peggy sat back in her seat, “I know our situations are different, but I understand the feeling of having something, or someone, take everything you knew and change it.”

“For lack of better words…”

Peggy’s lip quirked in a subdued smile. “I know I should always be rooting for my cousin since she’s family, but you need to identify if you can truly make this work. I’ll help you both, but I don’t want to see both of you get married and then divorced soon thereafter.”

“I love her, Peg.”

“Trust me, I know.” Peggy held up a hand to allow her more room to finish, “Though, you also love James.”

Steve cringed, heart aching to hear such truths uttered nonchalantly.

 “I want you to make a list of all of the things you love about Sharon. Then, all the things that frustrate you about her. When you’re finished, cross out the frustrating issues that can be amended through counseling. Whatever remains is what you will both need to work on _before_ your wedding.” She leaned in towards the alpha, “Focus on the good and try to give each other couple time. If you’re willing to share the list with me when you’re finished, I’d be happy to offer suggestions that I know she will like. This will take some time.”

“Time is going to get harder to manage as the wedding approaches.” Steve bemoaned.

“I offered to marry you two at the courthouse! I have a license from the state of New York.” Peggy reminded.

Steve grumbled under his breath about ‘wedding venues’.

“Now, on the topic of the Carter’s…I cannot offer you much hope there. Neither my aunt nor uncle is forgiving when it comes to such slip-ups. You’re lucky that they love you now, but it would be best to keep conversation about James and the twins to a minimum after breaking the news.”

Steve fidgeted with his pasta, “Sharon wants me to make Sam the best man. She doesn’t even want Bucky in the wedding party.”

Peggy’s eyebrows rose. “So are you-?”

“I‘m not doing that to him.” Steve ground out.

“If you want to get in the good graces of the Carter side of the family, it would be a smart move. I’m not saying I agree with it, but it _is_ a slap to the face to have a man pregnant with your offspring standing with you at the altar while you marry your bride.”

Steve imagined it in his head and inwardly winced. Bucky, 9 months pregnant and ready to pop, while handing him the rings to seal his fate to Sharon.

Or, Bucky having just had the twins.

The wedding was on June 10th and Bucky’s due date had been projected for June 24th.

They were cutting it close.

“I know it seems cruel, and you know I love James and think the world of him, but discuss it with him. He might not even be comfortable standing up there when he is going to be extremely pregnant, and quite possibly, very miserable. He might even be put on bed rest. You know male omega pregnancies are very finicky, and his previous medical records do no service in helping his case.”

“I don’t think I could live with myself if I asked him to attend the wedding as a guest. He’s family to me.”

Peggy was sympathetic as she reached out and touched his left hand in comfort. “None of this is going to be easy, but if you truly want to marry my cousin, you will have to do damage control. It isn’t fair and it is going to be difficult, but you need to think of Sharon’s dignity. Her intended husband is having twins with another omega. Said omega is to stand with them at the altar. How would you feel?”

Steve looked impossibly sad and defeated. The fellow alpha wanted to reach across and kiss the top of his forehead in sister-like affection. Steve was like a younger brother to her, and the thought of he and Sharon splitting hurt.

“I’ll….think about it. No guarantees I’ll discuss it with him, but I’ll try to think of something.” Steve conceded.

“Good man.”

There were a few minutes of companionable silence between them. For Steve, it allowed him the time for Peggy’s words to sink in and hopefully help him to decide his next steps. Peggy continued to enjoy her meal while feeling concerned towards the alpha’s mental well-being.

“Any more advice?” the younger man ventured hesitantly.

“Yes.” Peggy took a sip of wine and smiled mischievously, “Start a savings account. Children are expensive. Especially college tuition.”

Steve very nearly lost his appetite.

*

Steve decided to follow Peggy’s advice, but asking Bucky to step down as the best man was not a part of it.

He made his list, looked at all of the good his relationship with Sharon brought him, and did his best to be the most devoted and caring fiancé he could be towards her.

Sharon could see her fiancé was trying to make peace, but told him she wanted to wait until after the holiday season to tell her parents and family about Bucky’s pregnancy.

They were acceptable towards one another for at least the next few weeks. Olive branches extended as they continued with relationship counseling.

Steve was doing his best to hold everything together.

*

_December, 14 weeks pregnant_

With his pregnancy finally in the second trimester, Bucky scheduled his check-up appointment with Dr. Banner on a Thursday when he knew Steve was free. It was the 15th, and Bucky decided to also invite his mother along to join in on the fun. Sarah Rogers was working a shift at the hospital, thus Steve promised to text her the updates and pictures as soon as they had them. They weren’t sure if they would be able to identify the genders, but Bucky was excited all the same to see how big they were. (“A lemon, Buck! Two lemon sized pups in there.” Steve had supplied excitedly.)

Dr. Banner met Steve and Winifred with a cheerful smile. He particularly greeted Steve with an air of delight before beginning with his exam on the omega. He poked and prodded at Bucky, having the omega show him his slightly swollen abdomen while he pressed his hands in a light way around to feel for any abnormalities.

“Your blood pressure and vitals all look good. The urine samples were fine and we will have you blood test results back later today. Your health looks great overall, but I’d like to see how the pups are progressing and how your body is adjusting inside.” Dr. Banner directed his patient to put on a hospital gown so that he could do a more thorough examination.

Bucky was only slightly embarrassed as he went into a side room to change into the gown. His mother and best friend were good about keeping their eyes focused elsewhere as Dr. Banner examined his nether regions to rule that everything was in healthy working order. He didn’t say much, brows pinched as he stated there was more slick than usual, but that it wasn’t unusual for a pregnant omega.

Bucky had never noticed anything amiss.

When the time came for the ultrasound, Bucky watched with trepidation as the doctor spread the gel over his abdomen and pushed the scope against his stomach. The room was dark and silent until the sound of rapid beating filled the room.

Steve’s smile brightened at the sound of their twins alive; evident in the rushed symphony of sound.

Dr. Banner’s brow remained pinched as he waved the wand around, looking on his screen carefully. He took in a deep breath that had Bucky pausing in concern.

“What’s wrong?” he questioned apprehensively. This piqued both Steve and Winifred’s attention as things seemed to have been going just fine.

The doctor adjusted his glasses and pointed to the monitor, “Here’s baby #1. Looks perfectly healthy and it seems like he’s moving steadily in there. However….I don’t register a second heartbeat.”

“Where did they go?” Bucky’s voice wavered. 

Dr. Banner glanced to his patient in concern. He shifted back to the screen and pressed the wand around again, his brow still wrinkled. “This unfortunately happens for persons carrying twins in the first trimester- it’s not uncommon for a case of twins to become a case of just one. There are different factors that come into play for why it happens, but for all intents and purposes, your remaining pup looks very healthy and strong. The heartbeat is solid, the size is good-“

Winifred reached across and squeezed Bucky’s shoulder. Steve stood stunned beside him.

“-you’re having a male and he looks perfect. However, I’m sorry to inform you that I don’t see a second fetus or register a second heartbeat on the scans.” Dr. Banner turned to the family, his eyes heavy with compassion and sympathy.

Bucky didn’t grasp that he was already crying until Steve bent down beside him and kissed his temple. It shocked him, to feel and scent Steve so close when accompanied by such an intimate gesture of love and care.

“What causes this to happen?” Bucky ventured again fearfully.

“At this point in your pregnancy, there could be a number of factors. The remaining twin could’ve been absorbing more of the nutrients, or something might have happened in the second fetus’s development that caused non-viability. We can’t say for certain, but from what I can see on the ultrasound, there is no evidence of the second twin. Typically when this happens in the first trimester, the second fetus is reabsorbed in-utero. From my exam, I don’t see anything amiss in your health. This termination of the second fetus doesn’t reflect on anything that you did wrong. Please know that.”

Bucky was crying now, and it hurt. It was a sharp, piercing stab through the heart as grief washed over him all-consuming.

The physical blow that one of his children was gone.

He knew the first was still healthy and growing in strength, but it didn’t lessen the pain as much as he wanted it to.

Winifred consoled her son by running her fingers through his chin-length hair, “James, you’re having a son. It’s okay…it’s okay, my love. You’re still pregnant- you’re going to have a son!” She was trying to make light of the situation and stay strong for both of the parents.

Having had a miscarriage herself when she was younger, Winifred was all too familiar with the pain of losing someone before they were ever born. She knew what it was like to harbor life until suddenly, it had vanished.

“The best thing for you is to keep your strength up and rest. You still have a child that is depending on you and is doing very well.” Dr. Banner reassured. “You’re doing a great job and this pup looks like he’s benefitting from all the hard work you’re doing.”

Steve’s face was hardened in sorrow. Although he did not cry, his eyes were deep pools of heartache  and anguish. He held on to Bucky’s hand as the omega sat up and pushed his face against the alpha’s neck, taking in his steadying scent.

“I know your situation is unique, but it’s going to be important for you to keep vigilant on your support and ensuring his well-being. Please know that the loss of the second fetus is neither of your faults, but I am going to want to see you both again in two weeks to closely monitor the remaining fetus’s development.”

Steve nodded, taking the words to heart.

“Mr. Barnes, I’m going to call you as soon as I have your blood test results. For the rest of the day, I need for you to be with those who bring you comfort and take some time to rest.” He tapped at his board and then glanced between the alpha and Winifred, “And be sure he eats. He needs to keep up his strength. Too much emotional distress will not be good for him or his pup.”

*

Later on when he did get the call, he was reassured that there was nothing wrong with his blood test results. Everything came back within normal range and he was as healthy as he should be at 4 months pregnant.

However, the omega couldn’t let go of the thought that somewhere along the lines, he had screwed up.

_This is entirely my fault._

_I wasn’t strong enough._

*

Bucky couldn’t stop dwelling on what it would’ve been like if he had lost his sister. His son- _and my gods, he was having a_ son _, Jesus Christ_ , - would never know what it would be like to have a second part of you, another person who knew your thoughts and actions like their own. He wondered if his son would grow up and have that feeling of emptiness as much as Bucky did just thinking of a life without Becca.

When Winifred shared the news with the immediate family, his twin was quick to come to his aid.

Steve and Winifred took Bucky to the Barnes family home where they could both attend to him and make sure he wasn’t alone while he stabilized his thoughts. Natasha was on assignment in New Jersey, and Clint didn’t get off work until 10pm from where he was teaching self-defense classes. Steve decided to take the rest of the day off to help in whatever capacity he could.

He also needed the time to process and mourn, but with Bucky present, he continued to keep some facade of strength. He kept his mind focused on their remaining pup, their son, and what he could do for Bucky to make him comfortable. Hovering around him idly proved to only annoy the omega, so the alpha was thus banished from the living room as soon as Becca arrived.

Becca was now sitting with her twin, the two huddled on the couch with a shared blanket wrapped around their shoulders. The younger twin had put on _Friends_ and the pair of them were drinking hot chocolates, drowned in the silence save for their comforting TV show. It had always amazed Steve to see the way they non-verbally communicated. They both had a way of reading each other’s thoughts and soothing one another; anticipating what the other needed before they knew that’s what they wanted.

While Bucky was being attended to, Steve slipped out back to call his fiancé.

Sharon was down in DC for a few days at headquarters for a conference. She answered on the third ring, the sounds of shuffling in the background telling him she was getting to a quieter space. “Hey, how are you?”

“Not so great.” Steve sighed and went straight to the point so he wouldn’t keep her from work for too long, “We lost one of the twins, Shar.”

There was silence on the other line as Sharon took in a shocked breath. “Is James okay? Are _you_ okay?”

“In time, we will be…The doctor said it sometimes occurs in the first trimester. The other pup looks healthy and strong. It’s a boy.” Steve ran his hand down his face in drained defeat. “Bucky isn’t doing so well, so I’ll be staying at the Barnes house tonight to help his ma and Becca keep him stable.”

“I’m so sorry, Steve.” Sharon replied quietly. Her apology was sincere as she felt her fiancé’s sorrow hundreds of miles away. “I’ll be home on Sunday afternoon. Is there anything I can do?”

“No. I’ll be looking forward to seeing you in a few days. Just have a good conference and give me a call or text before you go to bed tonight, yeah?”

“I will.” She paused, “I love you, Steve.”

“I love you, too. I’ll talk to you later.” The alpha responded before they both hung up.

He remained in the backyard for a few moments, watching as the snowflakes fell from the skies. It was a week out until Christmas, and his heart bled to think of what Bucky was going through, being a twin himself. He sat along the back porch and looked up to the cloudy, late afternoon sky.

Winifred came out with a cup of hot chocolate, handing him one silently. The blonde took it graciously and scooted over for her to sit beside him.

“You know, when James and Rebecca were three years old, George and I tried for another child.” She stated with warm eyes looking far off into her memories, “We conceived and I carried the pup for 5 months. At 22 weeks, I miscarried. Doctors couldn’t figure out the exact cause, but they thought it had something to do with the pup’s heart.”

Steve’s face softened, “I’m so sorry…”

Winifred reached over and placed her hand over Steve’s, “It was painful to lose a child, even one we had never met, but life went on and down the road I was blessed to have two more healthy children. What I’m saying is: your grief and hurt are valid. Your loss is founded.”

The alpha’s throat constricted with emotion as he nodded and uttered a barely there, “Thank you.”

“Please stay here tonight. I think you both need each other more than you realize.” Winifred patted his shoulder, offering the comfort only a mother could bring that Steve accepted gratefully.

*

That night, the blonde alpha couldn’t sleep. He was restless as he lay on the Barnes’s living room couch, tossing and turning as terrible memories rattled his dreams. His memories plagued him with the look on Bucky’s face and the flashbacks of Bucky’s hospitalization when he came back from the war after being in enemy hands for two weeks.

He thought of sitting beside Bucky’s hospital bed while the omega was induced into a coma that lasted three weeks. He recalled the grief and emptiness that consumed him when the possibility of his friend never waking up was becoming more and more of a reality. He remembered looking at Bucky’s left side and feeling disoriented at the sight of grafted skin and a missing limb.

He remembers what it was like to lose Bucky. When his mother had called him and told him Bucky’s unit was attacked and that he was more than likely dead.

He remembers the pain when they found Bucky and brought him home, just to almost lose him _again_ from his extensive injuries.

His heart ached as he imagined what would’ve happened if they had lost _both_ of their children today. 

Plagued for too long by nightmares, Steve decides to act on his emotions and wraps himself in a blanket before walking quietly, but hurriedly, up the stairs. He enters into the first door on the right where Bucky’s old room has been transformed into a guest bedroom.

The omega lay on his side, back turned to his friend as Steve shuts the door behind him with a soft click and approaches the queen sized bed carefully, as if Bucky would lash out at him. 

Bucky stirred, having not been fully asleep, when he scents the alpha and registers his approach. He turned quietly from his sleep and looked at the blonde’s expression from the dim light of the room where outside lamps were seeping through the windows. The room was cast in an otherworldly glow that felt somehow sacred and safe, as it did in their childhood.

Steve is crying, his face open with agony. It reminds Bucky of when they were little kids, with the smaller alpha being too stubborn to show weakness until they were alone together.

Silently, Bucky lifts the covers of his bed and permits the alpha to climb in beside him. He welcomes the warmth as he shifts around and settles in with his back against Steve’s front. He is all-encompassed in Steve’s earthy alpha scent and warm support as the taller man edges close to him for the same familiar comfort.

When the blankets are pulled warmly and secure over them, the omega carefully takes Steve’s left hand and guides it low to settle over his abdomen. The alpha gasps, trying to reign in his tears as he buries his face into the back of Bucky’s neck. Bucky wills his eyes closed, his own tears escaping the corners as they share whatever _this_ is between them.

Together, they silently mourned the loss of one of their children while the outside sky showered down snow like a vigil to their sorrow. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy 2017! Thanks for hanging in there! I’m sorry for the heaviness of this chapter. :( I was debating back and forth, but I decided to follow my original outline. Thank you to my friend Lanya_Celebrian for your encouragement! And thank you everyone for your support and for reading!  
> I promise to write some sweet fluffy things in the future to weigh out the angst.
> 
> Next Chapter: Carter family drama, flashbacks, Sam’s advice, and more family feels…  
> Come chat with me~ :) (or play Overwatch with me on XB1!!)  
> [My tumblr](http://valkyriegail76.tumblr.com/)  
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/AmethystValkyri)  
> 


	5. Fractures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You have too much faith in me, Rogers.”  
> “Well, you keep surprising me, so let’s find out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please mind the angst tags! There are references to using alcohol as a coping mechanism..  
> -Not beta-ed. All mistakes are my own.

 

_Then_

He was in a meeting when he got the call.

It was his mother’s name flashing across the screen, causing a low stir of curiosity and worry to crinkle his brow. He excused himself hurriedly, apologetic as he exited the meeting room. Both Nick Fury and Maria Hill exchanged concerned glances as their illustrator shakily left to answer his mother’s call outside the door.

Sarah Rogers was never one to call him during his work hours, especially on Mondays when deadlines were due.

“Ma? Are you okay?”

There were hitched sobs on the other line, “Honey, you need to come home. It’s Bucky.”

“Ma? What’s going on?” Steve’s voice rose a slight octave in panic, though his body was frozen where he stood.  His heartbeat rung loudly in his ears as the rush of blood and adrenaline made everything else in the hall drown into the background.

Those two words changed everything.

_It’s Bucky._

“His unit was ambushed. Backup didn’t make it in time to find any survivors. They said there was a lot of fire and they’ve finished identifying the bodies, but his hasn’t been found. As of now he’s MIA, Steve. There was an officer at the Barnes’s house that spoke to the family- it doesn’t look good.” Sarah was doing her best to control her emotions for the sake of her son, but her voice kept cracking as she struggled to get the words out, “They are not optimistic.”

Steve was having a hard time comprehending what his mother was saying.

Nothing felt real as he gripped his phone, hands trembling slightly while the words echoed over and over in his head. He closed his eyes as his head pounded.

“Is he-?” he ventured; carefully, painfully.

Sarah was crying on the other line.

It was enough of an answer for Steve.

*

_Now_

Steve woke up in slow, groggy stages surrounded by the relaxed warmth of his best friend, his nose still buried at the base of Bucky’s neck where his wild brunette hair was slightly tangled from sleep. His pregnant omega scent engulfed Steve’s senses.

The blonde felt like a small child again, huddling up to the omega for heat like they did during their sleeping bag campouts in the living room when they were in elementary school. The only difference now was that Steve wasn’t a scrappy sick kid anymore. He was the one making up for most of the heat; his strong body giving off enough body warmth.

His hand must’ve twitched, for Bucky’s right hand snaked down to settle the alpha’s over his abdomen. Steve took in a deep breath, grounding himself on the knowledge that their son was still healthy and growing in the omega’s womb.

“I’m sorry, Buck…”

“You were stirring in your sleep.” The brunette whispered, his Brooklyn accent more pronounced as he drifted between sleep and wakefulness, “What were you dreaming about?”

Steve inhaled deeply before letting out a slow exhale, “I was dreaming about your deployment. More specifically, when I thought I lost you.”

Bucky’s shoulders stiffened a minuscule amount, but the alpha felt it. He rubbed his forehead against the nape of Bucky’s neck and soothed his hand across the omega’s stomach.

“I can’t help but to think that this is my fault. I’m afraid that my illnesses from when I was a kid are going to pass down to him. I know it won’t solve anything to speculate on the what-ifs…but what if our second child died because of my-“

Bucky gripped Steve’s hand tightly, “Don’t finish that sentence. It’s not your fault.”

“But my genes-“

“I could easily say that it happened because of my issues. It could’ve been my fault we lost them because of what I’ve put my body through.” Steve was shaking his head in disagreement, but the omega continued, “I’m not a stable person, Stevie. My body is literally a science experiment.”

“I hate it when you say that.” The blonde disagreed.

“Well, it’s true. We lost the pup because I’ve got a shit womb-“

Steve perched himself up on his elbow and turned Bucky to face him. The two were almost nose to nose, with Steve looking fiercely into the other’ gray-blue eyes.

A hair breath away and Bucky could close the narrow gap with a press of lips. If it had been another time, another year, another reality; it would’ve been so easy.

However, they were both riddled with sorrow and loss. Steve pressed his open palm against the side of Bucky’s face and wiped the tears prickling at the corners of his sleepy eyes.

“You are still carrying our pup. The doctor says your body is healthy and our _son_ is going to be fine. What happened wasn’t caused by any wrong you committed.” Steve rested his forehead against Bucky’s in a quiet show of support and intimacy. “We will get through this; _you_ will get through this and be stronger for it.”

The omega nodded wordlessly. Steve’s shoulders sagged as he inched away, giving the omega his personal space.

Not wanting the absence, Bucky reached out and gripped the blonde’s shoulder. “Please don’t leave yet.”

Steve’s eyes softened. “I’m here for you, but I can’t-“ he gestured between them, hesitant. “We can’t lay in here all day. I’m still engaged, Buck…” He looked uncomfortable bringing up his fiancé when they had been sharing whatever it was between them.

“Just a little while longer?”

Never one to deny his friend, the blonde silently agreed and maneuvered them back to their sides, his left hand trailing down again over the small swell of Bucky’s stomach.  He rested his head back against the nape of his neck, while also shifting the blankets back over them. The omega let out a contented sigh, finding great comfort in the familiar smell and embrace of his best friend.

Although his heart still ached over their loss, he still had a shot at being a parent. Having the alpha to himself, offering warm comfort, was enough to let his thoughts melt and his body to relax.

He knew that somehow, Steve would always try to do right by him. Steve was the father of his child; and perhaps, in another life, could’ve been his mate.

The word hung heavy in his head, causing a whole different type of guilt to blossom in his chest.

*

After ten short minutes, the omega stirred to the familiar sensation of the full and persistent ache of his bladder. He groaned into the pillow, detangling himself from the bulky alpha as he climbed over his best friend and groggily sauntered into the bathroom to relieve himself of the discomfort.

Steve also took the opportunity to stretch out off of the full size bed and wander downstairs to use the smaller bathroom while Bucky occupied the first. When he was finished, he was pulled in by the familiar scent of his mother and Winifred. He found the pair conversing in the kitchen over cups of coffee.

Sarah had a cup of black coffee in her hands, a hint of shadows under her eyes signaling to Steve she had not slept much the night before. Despite her late work schedule, she was still well put together, even with her white-blonde hair pulled in a ponytail and her attire consisting of sweatpants and a grey sweatshirt with a coat.

Winifred was still in her pajamas with a fuzzy house robe wrapped tightly around her waist. Her eyes softened sympathetically when they spotted Steve, and she made quick work to pour him a cup of coffee, black just as his mother took hers.

“How are you holding up?” Sarah asked as she wrapped her arms around her son in a comforting hug. She was only a few inches taller than Winifred, standing at 5’5, but nowhere near the height of her alpha son. Steve had to bend down to reach her.

“I’ll be fine. Still hurts, but at least Bucky and the other pup are doing well.”

“In times like these, it is most important to count our blessings.” Sarah agreed tenderly. “Win was showing me the pictures of your son. Seems likes the Barnes will finally have another boy in the family. I’m not surprised…you Rogers are always so stubborn. All men on your father’s side.”

Steve’s ears pinked. “Ma…”

“She’s right. It is the male’s sperm who decides the sex of the fetus.” Winifred chimed in.

“Do I even want to know what is happening right now?” Bucky groaned from the doorway.

All three turned to look at the slightly sleep disheveled omega. He sniffed the air and moaned forlornly, missing the taste of coffee.

Decaf just wasn’t the same

Sarah excused herself from Steve’s side and approached the omega, fondly placing her hands on his forehead and checking him over. It was in her nature to look after the Barnes children, just as she would her own.

“You’re a little flushed. Morning sickness, still?” Sarah questioned.

“Mm, mostly get light headed now if I don’t constantly have something in my stomach. Or if it’s too much, I’m as sick as a dog.” He confirmed. He allowed Sarah to fuss over him, her touch and intentions similar to his own mother’s, but welcome nonetheless.

“How are you fairing?”

“I’m better today. Still hurts, but I’ve got another pup who is demanding food and my energy.” He ventured with a thin smile.

“I’ll make us some French toast, then. Does that sound good, boys?” Winifred suggested as she began to pull out ingredients from the fridge. 

The whole scene was so impossibly domestic and somewhat disorienting to the omega, but he eased into it seamlessly. For now, he left thoughts of the doctor, his worries, and Sharon and Steve’s wedding in the far back of his mind.  He soaked in the familiar comfort of his ‘two’ mothers and his best friend, providing him all the security that family could when faced with difficult, life-changing news.

His thoughts wandered to his son; to Steve’s and his child growing steadily in strength inside him. He rested his right hand along his stomach, feeling re-assured by the beating of his heartbeat pulsing from his skin; echoed in to the same heartbeat of his child. He knew he was being sentimental, he knew his thoughts were encroaching on dangerous territory, but deep down it felt right to have Steve be with him along this journey.

It felt right that their mothers, that Winifred and Sarah, would be grandmothers together and get to fuss over their grandson for every holiday and milestone. Their families were going to be forever intertwined, and in the truth of his heart, Bucky held no regrets for their one night stand. He was able to have Steve and now, they would be able to venture through parenthood together.

Despite everything in life, he still had a part of Steve; they would have this. His body be damned, Bucky was going to do his best to keep healthy for the sake of having this piece of good in his life.

*

Steve insisted on escorting Bucky back to his apartment, the pair of them walking down the familiar streets of Brooklyn and reminiscing. The painful news of their second child still hung heavy on their shoulders, but the omega was tough and knew how to push through even the hardest times. It was a quality the blonde recognized and admired.  

“Did you tell Sharon?” the brunette questioned as they continued their quick strides in the cold.  

“I did. She’s coming home on Sunday.” Steve replied.

Although the topic of Sharon had formed into a sensitive subject over the last few weeks, Bucky wasn’t about to back down from checking in on the truth of their situation and how it was affecting Steve. Bucky wasn’t the best at putting himself first, and he knew it wasn’t healthy, but he couldn’t live with the guilt that Steve’s life was also proving more difficult. Bucky’s mind wasn’t helpful in supplying ideas that Steve had way more to lose than Bucky did.

The omega lost Brock, but Steve could stand to lose a perceived stable life with a woman he had invested years with in a relationship and a future.

“How are you two doing? I’m assuming you’ll tell the Carters soon.” Bucky nearly slipped on some sidewalk ice and cursed, just as Steve grabbed on to his right arm to steady him. The alpha huffed as he pulled Bucky’s arm in with his, keeping him upright.

“Last thing we need is for you to slip and fall.” Steve patted Bucky’s right hand in a placating gesture, holding on to him to help him keep his balance.

“Don’t avoid my question, Rogers. I ain’t no damsel.” The brunette reiterated with a sharp smirk.

Caught in his desire to avoid the subject, the alpha exhaled noisily. “We’re…navigating.”

Bucky gave him an unimpressed look. “Go on.”

“We’ll talk to them just before New Year’s about the pup. It hasn’t been easy between us recently, but we’ve been together for years so I have faith we’ll get through the rough patch. She’s upset.” Steve frowned, brows scrunching as his face slightly reddened. Bucky had stopped walking and leveled Steve a concerned look. The omega had immediately picked up on the stress and underlying ache the alpha was experiencing as he jumped through hoops to keep the peace with his fiancé while also being there for Bucky. The omega at least had the peace of mind that he had Nat and Clint, the whole Barnes and immediate Rogers family there to help him out.

Meanwhile, Steve was trying to calm the flames and hopefully not get roasted alive when the truth of their situation became common knowledge. Bucky doubted the Carters would be as accepting and supportive of Steve’s ‘illegitimate’ child.

The omega couldn’t help but to think that he would’ve lied for Steve; would’ve kept the child’s father a secret if it meant saving the alpha from the Carter family. However, Steve would never stand for it. He wouldn’t do things in the dark as Bucky would. Nor would Steve forgive him if Bucky lied about the child’s parentage or never told Steve.

Truth and justice, and all that.

Steve’s face softened. “It’s been a lot of arguing.  Can we talk about this another time, please? Preferably when my toes aren’t freezing and you’re not giving me a heart attack every time you slide on the sidewalk.”

”Guess it’s best we leave the heavy stuff aside. We have enough on our plates, don’t we?” Bucky acknowledged, “Though you’ll give me a proper update next time?”

The blonde nodded, looking far too worn-out for a man so young, “I will. I’m sorry, it’s just that…things with Sharon are still shaky. Truthfully, I’m overwhelmed.”

“Maybe you can tell me about your new art instead?” Bucky chimed. It was an out for Steve, which the alpha took gratefully.

Bucky took the offered arm and held it tightly with his right hand. Steve guided them homes softly out of the cold, all while discussing with the omega some of the new paintings he had planned, as well as the comic panels he was illustrating.

For the rest of the walk home they skirted around the subject of Sharon.

By the time they made it to Bucky’s apartment, Clint, Riley, Sam, and Nat were all waiting for them. Nat was the first to rush to the pair and embrace both of them in a group hug. There were words of condolences exchanged, and the parents took the comfort where they could. Natasha had planned a small kickback for the group to benefit the pregnant omega with the familiar, soothing scents of his ‘pack’.

There was no discussion of the upcoming wedding or the lost pup as the group focused their efforts on lifting the spirits of the grieving parents.

*

Sharon finally made it over to her apartment in the early evening, after a delayed flight and hectic traffic to get back to her New York City home. With his spare key, Steve had already gone over to sort her mail, tidy up the living room, and water her plants. It was a modern two bedroom, one bath apartment with an open kitchen and updated fixings.

Steve could’ve moved into the apartment ages ago, but they both felt traditional on the matter and wanted to wait until they were married to combine their entire assets. It was a detail that most of their friends disagreed with. It played in the back of Steve’s mind that you really don’t know someone until you live with them.

However, Steve _had_ lived with Sharon for a decent amount of time when he had been going through graduate school and then job-hunting. Sharon had been the main breadwinner at that time and supported her boyfriend 100% with his drive to be an illustrator. It had been a pain in the Carter’s eyes for the longest time, but Sharon’s encouragement allowed Steve the room to grow and to be confident in his work.

When Sam had found the perfect apartment, Steve had jumped on the chance to be independent and enjoy some living space with his close friend. It allowed Sharon to enjoy her own independence as she further advanced in her career.

The blonde looked around the apartment and smiled wistfully as he remembered the early days with his drafting table beside the window and his suitcase of clothing tucked in the corner of Sharon’s room. Things had been easier then.

Before Bucky’s accident.

Before the engagement.

Before _everything_.

It had been years ago, though, and Steve didn’t wish for it back. Many things were left settled in the past as he learned to get through the present.

Steve had followed Peggy’s advice. In the small notebook Peggy had gifted him, he had written out all of the things he loved about his fiancé; as well as the things he loathed. He had considered the list carefully, allowing himself to float in the sweet memories of the time of their early budding romance.

It also brought up the sour parts; the thorns of the rose bush that bled angry red.

He and Sharon were so much alike that when they clashed, it could be a brutal business of seething words, thrown glassware, and awards for the longest bout of silent treatment endured. They knew how to make the other happy, as well as how to push all of the wrong buttons.

The alpha was mulling over the lists, looking at all of the good things he had recorded about his intended mate. How she would do small things for him; sneak baked treats into his office, do his laundry when he was overly consumed with work, pull him from his stresses with her touch and suggestion of ‘fresh air’ at the beach. There were many little things Sharon did and had done in the past that left him feeling fond.

Though ever since the news of Bucky’s pregnancy, she had been considerably more closed off as she processed how she felt about the news. The welcome touches had dwindled; the small acts of baked love gone as she jumped headfirst into her career instead. Steve didn’t mind at first, knowing that Sharon was a workaholic much like he. However, they hadn’t had a proper afternoon of intimacy in what felt like weeks, and whenever Steve tried to initiate something; she was quick to shut down the timid suggestions.

The alpha hated to admit that he had also began to withdraw from thoughts and intentions to sleep with his omega fiancé. The realization shook him to the core. Stubbornly, he tried to place it on the stress and deadlines instead.

“Steve.” Sharon had shut the door and turned to face him, her eyes soft.

The younger man nearly jumped off of the bar stool, his shoulders straightening as he met his fiancé’s gaze.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t get here quicker. I argued with the airlines as much as I could to reschedule my flight, but all I got was a food voucher.”

The alpha set down his tea and moved around the island to greet her with a proper hug. The blonde omega reached up and kissed the side of his mouth.

“How are you feeling?” she asked. They were still on rocky ground, but Sharon could sense the pain in her fiancé and could only imagine what Bucky must’ve been experiencing to lose a child. It was a hard truth for her to swallow, but she felt proud of herself for not feeling bitter triumph over the tragedy.

“I’ll be okay. I- I don’t want to talk about it too much, if that’s all right with you?”

Sharon stiffened, “Is it because of me?”

Steve’s shoulders sagged, “The best we can do is keep moving forward. I’ve wracked my brain over and over again with explanations for why we lost the pup, and I know it’s not healthy…I’m drained, Shar. There’s nothing I could’ve done and if I keep letting it eat away at me-“

Steve’s voice hitched at the end, his throat constricting. Sharon held him tighter.

“I’ve got you.” she whispered.

Steve nodded, his face buried in her familiar scent. “I’m sorry…Want to tell me about DC?”

She smiled quietly, arms wrapped around Steve’s midsection. “I would love to.”

*

Christmas happened much like a hurricane; Bucky’s noisy extended family descended upon the Barnes’s Brooklyn residence on Christmas Eve, and with the omega being pregnant, he quickly became the main subject of talk. The amount of ‘helpful tips’, teasing, and  birthing horror stories were enough for Bucky to make a regular excuse of having to use the restroom in order to avoid such talk. It made him nauseous enough thinking about the idea of labor,

The Barnes family were loud, noisy, and sometimes overbearing, but came with the best intentions. Winifred’s own family lived in Pennsylvania, which was all the better for Bucky as George had enough siblings to fill the house and his ears. There was a lot going on in the house between his cousins, his aunts and uncles, and the matriarch of the Barnes family, Grandma Edith.

Feeling slightly overwhelmed with the noise, Bucky sat off to the side of the couch, nursing a mug of hot cider and nibbling on a plate of gingerbread cookies in his lap. Grandma Edith had been napping beside him, but perked up from her dream (or from the loud crash outside as Joy and a few cousins played street hockey).

“Hey grandma.” Bucky greeted softly as she turned to look at him with a easygoing smile. She was 85 and still one of the classiest, most lovely women Bucky knew. Her white hair was short and curled, looking like wisps of powdery clouds on her head. Her wrinkled skin was peppered with freckles that told of many days spent out enjoying the Coney Island sun.

On the other side of Edith Barnes sat John Proctor, Bucky’s brother-in-law/Becca’s husband. The alpha was holding on to his sleeping son, Jack, while he scrolled the internet on his phone to look up game scores.

Edith patted Bucky’s leg, “You’re going to be such a good parent, Jamie.”

“Thank you.” The omega smiled. His grandmother and grandfather were the _only_ people who called him Jamie. It was a term of endearment as Bucky was named after his grandfather, the late James Barnes.

“You’ve done so well, Jamie. And to think, you were juggling between _two_ alphas? Good to know the good ‘ol Barnes razzle dazzle hasn’t fizzled out.” She winked.

The omega’s face quickly fell into blushing embarrassment. He nearly choked on his cookie.

John began to suspiciously cough as well.

“There was a reason your grandfather and I got married so quick, you know. I found out I was already two months pregnant with your uncle Terrance when we eloped. I guess what happens at the dance hall, doesn’t always _stay_ at the dance hall.” She chuckled to herself, her eyes twinkling wistfully. “Your grandpa was such a mighty fine dancer. We were both dating other people, you know, but your granddad convinced me to a dance, and after a few songs we snuck out the back and left our dates at the end of the night. I think they put two and two together.”

“Grandma!” Bucky couldn’t help the laugh that sputtered from his mouth.

Edith chuckled. “The way James held me close that night, I just knew. And not long after that, Terrance was on his way, so we eloped. The rest is history.”

“What’d everyone think when you guys eloped? Dad said you had a church wedding. Does he know about this?” the brunette asked as he tried to process this new information. It would explain why the wedding photos only showed his grandparents and not his great-grandparents present, nor a big wedding party.

“Goodness, no. Our families were angry, but despite it all, we knew it was all meant to be. Once your Uncle Terry was born, everything else didn’t matter. We were happy.”

Bucky was quiet for a moment, brows pinching as he thought over what she had shared with him. “Grandma-“

Edith reached over and squeezed his right hand, “Sometimes it’s okay to bend the rules, honey. I did, and I’ve never once regretted it.”

The matriarch slowly rose from her seat on the couch and levelled herself with her cane, waving off both John and Bucky as they attempted to help her. “You can help me up when I’m in a casket.” She muttered good-naturedly, chuckling to herself as she made her way to the kitchen to where the gaggling giggles of Bucky’s mother and aunts drifted into the sitting room.

John was staring at Bucky, his face in shock. ”Jesus Christ. How does she-?”

“When we think she’s sleeping, she is actually using her super hearing.” Bucky confirmed. “Her mind is as sharp as a knife.”

His brother-in-law chuckled, careful not to wake Jack as he shifted on the couch. “No wonder Becca makes a point to never talk in front of her when she’s around. She soaks in all the gossip like a sponge.”

Bucky hummed in agreement, his thoughts mulling over the conversation. It wasn’t out of character for her to be dozing and then wake up and speak so eloquently. However, this time her words seemed to pierce the omega as it hit too close to home.

_We were both dating other people…_

_I just knew…_

The brunette’s eyes stung with unwelcome tears, causing him to curse in annoyance. He shifted his shoulder to wipe his eyes and sighed, his stomach feeling a little soured by the thoughts swirling in his mind.

His family had already been told that he was pregnant, and Joy (un)helpfully let it slip that the father was _Steve_ , whom they all knew and adored. A few who hadn’t known Brock as well were a little saddened they broke up, but Steve was a household name amongst the Barnes and the fact that Bucky was having a child with him called for some cause of elation.

Of course a few family members were a little leery upon reminding that Steve was _engaged_ to someone else, but Bucky could hold his own when faced with questions such as:

_“Are you comfortable doing this as a single parent?”_

“I have awesome friends and family to guide me.”

_“What about your arm?”_

“I can do this one-handed.”

_“Will Steve be in the picture?”_

“He’s extremely supportive and excited to be a dad.”

_“Is it healthy for the baby to be without an alpha? How are you handling the scenting?”_

Bucky took pause on that one. He wasn’t entirely sure if he had to have Steve with him all of the time, but he knew that studies generally reported it was ideal for a pair to stay together when one of the partners was expecting. Pups could begin scent-bonding in the womb; feeding off of the emotions and happy chemical releases their mothers experienced when around their mate or loved ones.

The omega was completely lost in thought, agonizing over the question while his family began making suggestions of baby names for the soon to be newest addition. Bucky eventually excused himself, feeling tired and overcome with senses overload.

Becca snuck off after him.

The pair sat out on the back porch’s rocking swing, soaking in each other’s comfortable familiarity. Becca rested her head against her brother’s shoulder and sighed when he ruffled her hair gently.

“John told me about what Grandma said to you.”

The older twin sighed, “Don’t tell dad. He might have a crisis.’”

Becca closed her eyes in complete relaxation. “What’s one more at this point? You’re already giving him more gray hairs with your situation.”

“Ma told me he had an ‘alpha to alpha’ talk with Steve, and when I texted Stevie, he said he was sworn to secrecy.”

The omega female snorted, “Probably something about dad cutting his balls off if he doesn’t ‘alpha up’ and provide for you.”

“Please never say ‘Steve’, ‘dad’, and ‘balls’ in the same sentence ever again.” Bucky’s face twisted.

Becca chuckled for a moment until lulling into silence, the two peacefully swinging back and forth.

“I think grandma is encouraging me to elope.” Bucky supplied, “Maybe I need to go on one of those dating apps. I heard some alphas are really into the whole pregnancy kink thing.”

“You’re already in love with Steve.” His twin reminded, “Won’t do much good when your body is trained on luring in your baby daddy.”

“ _Baby daddy_ …” Bucky mouthed, brows scrunched.

“I know Steve loves you, too. He just doesn’t know how to do things for himself, like break up with Sharon and makes things official with you.” Becca explained bluntly.

“Becs, that’s messed up-“

“No, it’s _more_ messed up to marry someone else when your true mate is standing right in front of you pregnant with your child.” Becca looked searchingly in her brother’s eyes, “Think about it, Bucky. Was the sex electrifying? Does your heart flutter every time you’re around him? Your first heat was _triggered_ by him!”

Bucky shook his head, though the resounding answer in his heart was:

_Yes, yes, yes._

“He’s basically a married man, Becs! Fuck, I came out here to get some quiet and now you’re annoying me.”

“I think you should take grandma’s advice and elope with Steve.”

“She probably wasn’t even talking about him.”

“Bullshit, you _know_ she was! She knows everything!”

“That’s still awful advice! He doesn’t love me like that. He’s in love with Sharon.”

Becca barked out a shrill laugh. “Seriously!? He’s been in love with you since _middle school_. Of course he’d elope with you.”

Bucky shook his head vehemently, “ _No_. We had sex and he _still_ chose Sharon over me. I’m not- I’m not his first choice. We were too drunk.”

“You know that’s not true.”

“You have no right to tell me how I feel.” Bucky knew it was a lame excuse, and his sister was quick to reveal that.

“I can when you’re being an idiot about it. I want to see you happy and the two of you together, just being around one another, is the happiest I ever see you. Both of you. You two belong together and as much as I like Sharon, she’s not right for him.”

Bucky was massaging his temple with his thumb and pointer finger, his stomach clenching. “He’s getting married, Becs. I don’t want to be that sad person who pines after a taken man, nor do I want to break apart a marriage.”

“Well maybe you need to ‘bend the rules’ then.”

Bucky stilled at the comment and glared at her. He knew that Steve loved him in some way, that Steve would try to do right by him, but he couldn’t make peace with the fallout of friends if he separated an engaged couple. Even if Steve felt the same, Bucky was a champion at denying what he truly wanted.

He was a coward.

Becca leaned forward and kissed her brother’s forehead, “I’m sorry I got carried away, but it has been eating away at me ever since you and Steve announced your pregnancy. I know you wanted some silence, but now seemed like the best time.”

“Bully.” Bucky muttered half-heartedly. He allowed his sister to pull him into a hug, her cheek resting at the top of his head while he buried his face in the juncture of her neck and shoulder. The scent of his twin; of his second half and of family radiated down to ease his stress.  

“Please, just think about it, okay? Promise me that much?”

The pregnant omega could at least agree to that extent.

*

Steve’s Christmas felt more like pageantry than real-life. It was difficult for him to not share the news about becoming a father; the news about Bucky kept safely locked away for at least a few more days until Sharon was ready to tell her parents.

The one saving grace was Peggy, who kept things light hearted and fun, though one look and raise of her brow communicated with the blonde that she felt his discomfort. Steve hovered around Peggy and her mate, Angie. The alpha woman and her beta mate were a breath of fresh air away from Sharon’s parents and their high expectations.

He went through the motions, but his heart was half in it as thoughts of his pregnant friend and their child filled his mind.

_What are we going to do next year for Christmas when our son is born?_

_Will we have joint Christmases?_

_Will the Carters accept him in their home?_

_Will I see my child on holidays?_

Peggy bumped his shoulder with hers, handing him a mug of spiked eggnog. “Penny for your thoughts?”

“It would be a good investment.” Steve huffed as he sipped the beverage thankfully. He looked on as his mother and Will spoke excitedly with the elder Carters, fitting right in despite the surroundings of exuberance that the home exuded. It was a far cry from the humble brownstone in Brooklyn that Steve grew up in with his hardworking single mom.

“Did you follow my advice?” the brunette alpha questioned discreetly. Steve marveled that a press of her perfectly red lips left no residue on her white mug. His admiration for Peggy had first started as a one-sided, unrequited crush. Peggy was exclusively attracted to women, and Steve had always respected who she was and eventually tampered down the secret romantic torch he held for her. Over time, she became akin to a big sister in his eyes. She was older than him by a few years and wise beyond her years.

“I did.” Steve whispered.

“And the results?”

The blonde reddened as he looked around the room, “You want to talk about this here?”

“There’s no time like the present and Angie is busy entertaining my mother.” She pinched the back of Steve’s arm, “No deflecting.”

“We’re still getting married.”

“Mmm. Have you told my aunt and uncle about your situation with James?”

“No-“

“Brace yourself for it, then. Get back to me with your ‘results’ after you’ve told them.” The older alpha patted his elbow.

Steve’s brows pinched, confused on Peggy’s words.

“Words of advice, Steven. If you want to keep things fresh with my cousin, it might be wise to romance her from time to time.” Peggy’s voice went slightly lower, a private conversation. “I overheard her telling Angie that you have not been intimate with her in weeks.”

Steve couldn’t vocalize his embarrassment enough when such a personal subject was brought up. He could kiss and hold his fiancé, but he had been having trouble with initiated more. The stress of their wedding, their situation, and Bucky and the pup left his more base carnal desires on the backburner.

“Perhaps a romantic getaway would do you both good. Somewhere warm, sandy, and with the ocean to get things going. Just a thought.” 

Peggy gave him a sympathetic look as she glided away, back to her own mate who looked to her like she make the stars shine at night. The blonde alpha leaned himself against the doorway, downing the rest of his eggnog before making his way back into the kitchen for a refill.

*

Bucky and Steve exchanged gifts at the omega’s apartment two days after Christmas.

The brunette was still clad in warm fleece pajama pants and a sweatshirt when he ushered the alpha inside his cozy apartment. It didn’t escape the omega’s notice that Steve looked exhausted with shadows under his eyes that spoke of stress and/or lack of sleep. 

What Bucky didn’t know was that the circles under his eyes had been a result of a fight and lack of sleep over Steve’s ‘problems’ in the bedroom. Sharon had tried prompting Steve to be intimate with her, and as much as they had kissed and gotten close, the alpha couldn’t get hard enough to perform. He had blamed it on too much alcohol, though they both knew that wasn’t the full truth. Steve had left it up to the alcohol and stress, and Sharon had gotten frustrated and turned her back to him in bed.

Walking home in the snow from your fiancé’s apartment at two in the morning hadn’t done him any favors.    

“What’s dragging you through the mud?” Bucky asked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

The blonde’s lips tilted into a tight smile, “Trying to push back hibernation.”

The pair embraced in a quick hug, allowing the brunette to help Steve get his coat off from his shoulders afterward. The alpha had a large bag with him, both in width and length. The omega eyed it suspiciously with a nervous feeling settled low in his gut.

“What is that?”

“Your Christmas present, jerk.” Steve went across the room to set it on the kitchen table. The omega eyed is distrustfully as he followed him.

“Is it a baby swing or somethin?” Bucky guessed as he ran his hand across the shiny blue and white snowflake wrapping paper.

“Just open it.” There was a glint of mischief in Steve’s eyes as he looked far too pleased for a man that had bags under his blue eyes. It made him appear more haggard; more fragile than he was.  

Bucky grumbled to himself as he pulled at the top of the paper and ripped down, groaning when it revealed a giant cardboard box underneath.

“If this is one of those matrioshka doll gifts with a tiny box at the end, I swear to god, Rogers.”

“It’s not! I promise.” Steve snorted and leaned against one of the kitchen chairs, “Just look in the box.”

Bucky stared at him for a moment, Steve’s gaze stubborn and earnest. Sighing, the omega pulled off the rest of the paper and eyed the folds of the box. He lifted one side, pulling at the tape as it felt back.

He froze when he saw what was inside.

It was a guitar case.

“Before you get upset, I want you to know that this is only the first part of your gift…I  know how hard it was when you got back and you couldn’t play the guitar anymore…”

“Steve-“

“I’ve been talking with Tony and he thinks he can hook you up with a prosthetic to help you play. He also helped me find a teacher, here in New York, who can teach you how to play again.”

The omega’s throat was tight with emotion as he unsnapped the lid of the guitar case, opening it up to a beautiful red and black Fender Telecaster. His stomach tightened in nervous anticipation to hold it, his heart aching with want.

He hadn’t been able to play-

Not since-

“I know it seems impulsive of me, but I saw the guitar and I began doing some research to see if there was something that could help you to practice again. I know you miss playing and I thought I could help. The guy Tony referred me to recommended this one to start out with, especially if you get fitted with a prosthetic. I know you sold your electric a few years ago, so I thought-“ Steve noticed how still Bucky had become, how quiet he was as he stared at the gift with clenched teeth.

Steve’s eyes fell away.

“-I thought it would be fun for you, that it would be good for you to play again.”

“This is too much, Steve.” Bucky’s voice was strained.

Steve rubbed the back of his neck, “I can take it back if you don’t like it. I’m sorry, it was- I should’ve asked you first….I got carried away.”

The brunette shook his head.

 “This is expensive, Steve.”

“It’s a gift.” The blonde reminded gently.

“It’s a _guitar_.”

“With lessons. And a prosthetic, if you’re willing to let Tony work with your arm.”

“How much was all of this?”

“It doesn’t matter. I’ve wanted to do this for a while, so…you can either take it, or you can sell it.”

Bucky choked out a laugh and ran his right hand down his face, “You’re the only asshole I know who gives an electric guitar to an amputee.”

“With lessons. And a prosthetic.” The blonde supplied and bit his lip to hide his abashed smile. “So…do you like it?”

Bucky cleared his hand away, revealing to Steve the wetness glistening in his eyes. The omega approached and wrapped his arm around Steve’s shoulder, pulling him into a proper hug.

_I just knew…_

“I don’t like it…I love it, Stevie.” The brunette confirmed.

The alpha’s shoulders sagged in relief as he returned the hug, letting out an exhale of relief that his gift had been well received.

The omega was truthfully excited to start playing again. He didn’t mind having to get fitted for a specific prosthetic and go to lessons if it meant he could properly play again. He missed music as it had been such a solid hobby since he was 9. He had taken an acoustic guitar with him overseas and had played many a times to des-tress and declutter his mind. It was also a gift his unit enjoyed as they sang songs around campfire and bonded in those early days.

To be given the chance to play again made his heart sing.

In comparison, he felt shy of his own gift, which was a set of gray Copic Sketch markers for Steve to use at work. Still, Steve accepted them graciously and seemed genuinely pleased about the new art supplies. He chided the omega that he shouldn’t spend so much on him, but he was putting his own foot in his mouth when Bucky smacked his shoulder and looked pointedly to the guitar.

Point taken.

Bucky couldn’t have asked for a better gift as Steve pulled the beautiful new guitar from its case and helped him to situate it in his lap. The omega played with the strings, adjusting the chords one-handedly with furrowed brows. The weight of the guitar was light but solid in his hold; familiar and welcome, even though it would be a while until he could properly perform with it.

While he fiddled around, Steve inspected the copic markers and began to draw in the sketchbook he brought over.  Before Bucky could bark at him to quit it, there was already a perfectly crafted figure with long, masterful strokes done of the brunette with his gift.

“Y’know, by the time I get anywhere near decent with this, I won’t be able to play.”

Steve quirked a brow, “Why’s that?”

“I’ll be unable to reach the strings because I’ll be the size of a football field.”

“If you can do it one-handed, you can do it pregnant.”

“You have too much faith in me, Rogers.”

“Well, you keep surprising me, so let’s find out.”

The pair enjoyed the afternoon; Bucky strumming and adjusting the guitar with his one hand while supporting the neck with what remained of his left arm while Steve drew the scene in gray tones with the art set Bucky purchased for him.

Almost an hour later when Bucky glanced up from his music daze, he found the alpha resting against the recliner, mouth half open with deep breaths and a slight line of drool. The omega smiled and laid a blanket over his best friend.

*

The gift from Clint and Natasha was just as special and thoughtful, causing the omega to tear up _again_ when they opened the doors to the ‘office’ room in the evening. It was a small room that wasn’t quite big enough for an adult, but it was just about right to fit in the basics for an infant or child. The door had been closed for a while, which hadn’t seemed off as it was for Natasha’s use and Bucky had no reason to wander inside of there.

However, when Clint opened the door for him and Steve, the room had been re-painted a soft neutral gray with white borders and an accent wall with white and gray stripes.

“Are you kidding me right now?” Bucky wheezed.

Steve audibly gasped behind him.

“I barely used the space and it made sense to give the baby a room of their own.” Natasha shrugged, arms crossed nonchalantly, though Bucky knew she was actually quite pleased. “There’s no closet, but I figure we can find some furniture that would fit. It’s big enough for everything else.”

“We couldn’t decide on a theme you guys would like, so we did gray and white. Becca had some ideas from your Pinterest.” Clint snickered. “Didn’t realize you made a _baby_ album.”

“It’s called a _board_.” The redhead corrected.

“It’s awesome; I love it!” Bucky brightened. “We’ll have to nerd a few things out, but this is off to a good start. When did you guys paint this?” he ran his hand along the walls, admiring the work while Steve smiled brightly at the crown molding.

“This is amazing, you guys.” Steve breathed.

“We finished a few days ago. It only took us an afternoon to clear things out and paint.” Clint couldn’t contain the bright cheerful smile on his face, “I wanted it to be space or car themed, but Nat disagreed and wanted ‘tasteful’, while Becca insisted on _Harry Potter_. So…we went solid colors.”

“Now you can have all three.” Natasha surmised.

Bucky could barely contain his excitement as he began to share some of the pins he had saved for the baby. Luckily, it seemed Steve was on board with whatever decorating ideas Bucky had for their son.

Although in the back of Bucky’s mind he was still hurting over the loss of his second child, he was reminded again and again how fortunate he was to have the care and love of those around him. Little by little, joyfulness crept into his heart again. He felt guilty to be happy at times, but pushed through the self-loathing and grief to focus his time and energy on his growing pup and changing world.

With Nat and Clint easily transitioning into a role much like a family dynamic, Bucky felt more at ease knowing that despite his shortcomings and imperfections, his pup would still be provided with all the love they needed.

It was what he hoped for.

*

It was nearing the end of December and the snow had begun to fall more persistently across the state of New York. Steve and Sharon decided it was time to tell her parents the truth of Steve’s situation. Now with the extended family gone from the Carter family home, Sharon felt more comfortable knowing they would have more privacy in discussing the matter.

Steve didn’t want to think of their matter being more of an ‘issue’, but his fingers twitched in nervousness just the same.

Irving and Rene Carter had had their ups and downs with Steve in the past. When they first were given the news that Sharon was dating an artist in college, they assumed the fire would pan out and that Sharon would move on. Instead, the Carters began to see what Sharon saw in Steve; kindness, devotion, drive, and loyalty.

Although Steve was not wealthy or had, in their opinion, the best of job security being an artist, they admired that their future son-in-law was dedicated and talented. Steve was well-educated and had built a humble name for himself amongst the comic book industry, working for SHIELD comics. It was why Irving had given Steve permission when he had asked for his only daughter’s hand in marriage.

Both of the carter’s greeted the engaged pair warmly and led them into the dining room were some snacks and beverages had been left out. Steve could never get used to the hovering of a maid or personal chef about the compound, but the Carters always treated their employees well and were very generous. They did not brag or discuss money, and when planning for the wedding went underway, they had insisted to pay for whatever was needed as Sharon _was_ the only child.

Steve was all nerves and it must’ve shown, for Rene Carter looked him over with curiosity, quirking her brow as she then looked to Sharon for explanation.

It was a good a time as any for the truth to come out.

“So there’s a matter we need to discuss.” Sharon declared coolly, causing Steve to wonder how many times she had rehearsed that in a mirror before going in front of her parents.

“Is everything all right?” Irving asked worriedly.

“No one is dying or injured.” Sharon placated. “There’s just a small hiccup of news that we need to share with you both before it becomes common knowledge and everyone knows. You see, one of the groomsmen is under a condition. The best man, actually.”

“Oh dear, has James gone into rehab?” Rene questioned worriedly. “I heard he was struggling with his PTSD and that he and his boyfriend broke up. I was wondering if losing his alpha would trigger her violence again.”

“Perhaps that’s a good thing. If he needs help, having the proper counseling should really help him to function more normally.” Irving agreed.

Sharon stammered, taken aback, “That wasn’t quite what I was getting at-“

“Bucky is pregnant.” Steve corrected, nervousness making his hands clammy. He inwardly cursed himself, now feeling like the brash one in the whole situation.

The omega’s parents exchanged looks, confused and uncertain on how to respond to the news.

Rene’s frown deepened, “Are he and his alpha going to give their child a proper upbringing? When is he due?”

“He’s due on June 24th.” Steve replied, at the same time Sharon stated, “It’s Steve’s.”

They both looked to one another, and then to the Carter’s.

“What do you mean by, ‘it’s Steve’s’?” Irving questioned.

“While Sharon and I were on a break, Bucky and I slept together. From that union…Bucky conceived. We took a paternity test and the child is mine.” Steve was going to try and stick with the facts for the conversation, no matter how much his stomach coiled in dread.

He was in the Carter’s territory.

Irving stood up from his seat, the scent of rage filling the room. He postured himself ready for a fight as anger towards Steve radiated off of him in droves. The change of atmosphere was so sudden and overwhelming, it caused Steve’s ears to ring with adrenaline. Rene still looked confused and troubled as she processed the news.

“Oh my-” Rene zeroed her gaze down to Steve. “So this is an illegitimate child. What are you planning on doing?”

Steve tried not to focus on the angry alpha and instead focused on speaking to the elder Carter woman. He kept Irving in the corner of his eye. “I’m going to help raise my son. It might be joint custody, but I plan to be there for him and Bucky so that he has a good life.”

“And how do you feel about this, Sharon?” Rene asked, her face pale with a mixture of abhorrence and shock. In any other situation, she would applaud a parent for stepping up to the plate to be the best provider as possible for a child. However, the fact that this was _Steve_ and that he had sired an illegitimate pup with his best friend was unforgivable.

Sharon’s face wasn’t a far echo from her mother’s. “I’m still processing this, but I’m- _we’re_ trying to work through this and find a common ground.”

“This is a disgrace.” Irving growled, “How could you allow yourself to degrade my daughter and fuck your best friend? He spoke at your engagement party!”

“We’re just friends.” Steve amended. “It won’t happen again.”

“No, an alpha who is having a child with an omega cannot be ‘just friends’. The whole dynamic changes.” Irving was pacing, distraught now, “I trusted you with my daughter! I trusted you to be faithful and you’ve bedded some other omega whore and knocked him up! How can I sit well with this? Did you truly expect that I would take this news _well_?!”

Sharon was stiff in her seat, fingers clenched. “We’re _working_ _through_ this-“

“If you are truly to be mated to one another, you shouldn’t have the stress of a challenging omega.” Rene pointed out. “It is not good for either of you to have divided loyalties or feel that you cannot be truly and fully dedicated to one another.”

“I’m not paying for this wedding if that _homewrecker_ is there!” Irving yelled.

Steve’s hackles raised, “Don’t call him that! He’s my best friend!”

“Of course you would defend your _broodmare_!”

“Irving that is enough!” Rene snapped.

Steve was growling, teeth barred and ready for a fight. He couldn’t control his response as he saw red at the mention of Bucky’s name in a negative light. Sharon pressed her hand against his chest, forcing him to sit as her own annoyance pulsated through her scent. Although she kept reassuring that they would ‘work through this’, Steve couldn’t help but feel like he was being cornered into making a decision that would make his fiancé happy. He was confused and angry.

Rene leveled her attention back to her daughter and the younger alpha, “Is he still to be your best man? You can’t possibly have him up there when his due date is so close.”

“We grew up together. He’s family.” Steve growled, trying to bring himself to calm. His eyes were still set on Mr. Carter in nervous agitation. “He’ll be there as my best man.”

Sharon tensed, “Steve, you’ve discussed the whole best man deal with him, didn’t you?”

“We both made a bed decision and this wasn’t planned, Sharon.” The young alpha reminded. “I can’t push away someone I’ve known my whole life because we made a slip up and ended up in this situation.”

“If that omega stands at the altar with you while you intend to marry Sharon, I will refuse to walk her down that aisle. I will not support any person who is willing to disrespect my daughter, their own _future mate_ , with such scandal and disregard to their reputation. If you will not protect her, then I cannot give my consent to your union.” Irving set his foot down, exacting his power over the young couple.

“It would be the gossip of the year to see our daughter marry her alpha while his pregnant mistress looks on. I can’t-“Rene looked pained, “How could you think that this is okay? Even if it is Bucky, what do you think others are going to _say_? You’ll be the laughing stock of the wedding season.”

Steve’s ears burned as he clenched his teeth.

“I’m so…so disappointed, Steve.” Rene looked down at her hands, clasped tightly on the napkin in her lap, “I love you like a son, but this is so…disorienting, coming from you. I don’t know what either of you intend to do, but I agree with Irving. If Bucky is present, it would be a slap in the face to all of us. If you have any amount of respect for us, or for our daughter, he will be removed from the wedding party.”

“Actions have consequences, Steven. I will not support this mishap.” Mr. Carter stated with finality.

Defeated, Steve nodded. He knew when to pick his fights, and furthering his argument with the Carter’s would not help him align to their good graces. Despite his joy in soon becoming a father, he was met with the grief and pain of losing the respect of a family he had worked hard to gain the trust of. Rene had always been one to defend Steve and see the good in him, even when Sharon had first started dating him. He had been the ‘hippie boyfriend’ when she had first brought him over, penniless but hardworking. Rene has seen the good in him and had supported their relationship from the start.

Steve knew, deep down, that from other perspectives, having Bucky there would be indecent and hurtful to his bride to be. He wanted to follow his heart and make a point that he didn’t care what other thought, but he would be deeply hurting his intended mate in the process.

It didn’t slip past his notice that Sharon had stayed mostly quiet during the exchange. It was Steve’s mess, and she was stepping back to allow him to clean it up. Although she reassured that they were ‘working through’ the rough patch, he couldn’t help but harbor some ill feelings that she was wanting to see him drag his knees through the mud for forgiveness and to set everything ‘right’.

The alpha wasn’t sure what hurt more: losing the respect of the Carter’s, or his fiancé’s quiet agreement with her parents. He knew obscurely that what he was feeling wasn’t rational, as he _was_ the one in the red zone, but it was still painful to admit that it would be indecent to have Bucky there. To any outside source, it would seem a reasonable request to not have the pregnant omega in the wedding party, or even _at_ the venue.

But to Steve, it was _Bucky_ , and that topic occupied its own sacred space in and of itself.

*

They didn’t stay long after the heated exchange. Irving retired himself to his office, his blood pressure too high to deal with his disappointment and resentment towards Steve any longer. Rene had politely suggested they leave, so that the smell of another irritated alpha could be aired out of the house. She had trouble meeting Steve’s eyes as she saw them to the door, her farewell stiff and stricken when she shut the door behind them.  

There was tension between the couple as they made their way to Sharon’s car and loaded themselves back in for the hour drive back to Manhattan. They were both stewing in their thoughts, confused and unsure of where their relationship would go from here.

“You wanted this.” Steve accused when the silence had become deafening, “You knew your parents would want Bucky out.”

“I had assumed you already _had_ this discussion with Bucky and that he would step down.” Sharon countered as she leveled her gaze to the road while she drove. Her knuckles twitched minutely on the steering wheel in annoyance.

“I didn’t because we _lost a child_ , for fucksakes. What kind of monster would I be if I demoted him after we received devastating news?”  Steve wiped at his eyes in frustration, “He’s a brother to me, Shar.”

The omega was feeling just as vindictive. It was a weak point in her; to have such a fiery temper. The stereotype that omegas were meek and soft spoken could be swiftly proven untrue when provided with her as an example. She scowled, “Apparently _more_ than just a brother.”

Steve glared over to her, “I thought we were past that.”

“It still hurts, Steve. You _fucked_ your best friend behind my back and now you’re getting the family you’ve always wanted! How do you think that feels!?”

“I told you I’m sorry! I’ve been telling you I’m sorry since it _happened_! We were on a break, you made that expressly clear!”

“It doesn’t erase the fact that you fucked him! Drunk actions are sober desires.”  Sharon scoffed, “I should’ve seen it coming. The way he pines after you; has been pining since the hospital. I’ve been as supportive as I can, but I’ve drawn my line.”

“You can’t get over this, can you?”

Sharon trembled in frustration, “I’m trying to see the good, Steve! I’m _trying_ , and I feel for you and Bucky, but at the same time…you’re supposed to be _my_ mate! Not _his_! You betrayed my trust and it hurts! It fucking _hurts_ , Steve!”

“Sharon-“

“No, this isn’t fair! I love you and I’ve stood by you for so long, but I can’t stand by you with this! I refuse to support-“

“Sharon, the road!!!” Steve shouted, bracing himself as the omega made a sharp swerve to avoid an oncoming vehicle on the narrow road. Their car veered straight off the icy highway and onto the shoulder where they spun out twice until the piled up snow stopped them.

The blonde omega shuddered, finally breaking down into tears as Steve panted and tried to still his racing heart. The airbags didn’t deploy and they were lucky enough to have not gotten hurt. The car may have suffered a few dents, but the snow had cushioned their wipe out.  

“Are you okay?” Steve questioned as his warm breath caused the windows to fog up. There was a crack on the windshield that was beginning to spider out, but they were not in any state of harm.

“I can’t do this, Steve.” The blonde hunched her shoulders, her forehead resting against her hands on the steering wheel. “I want to be open and try, but I am so _angry_ with you.”

Her voice was shaking as she began to cry; tears of pent up distress and frustration flowed freely, causing the alpha’s own voice to get caught in his throat.

“I don’t know what to do.” Steve confessed, “I’m trying to keep everyone happy. I want _you_ to be happy. If it means telling Bucky to-“

“No, I don’t- I don’t know where we can go from here, Steve.”

Steve chewed on his lower lip, crushed into the feeling of hopelessness.

 “If you can’t even see how much it hurts to have the man my fiancé slept with beside me on our wedding day, pregnant with your child when I can’t-“ Sharon’s breath hitched.

“Sharon?”

“I need time, Steve. I’m putting a hiatus on our wedding.”

“You _can’t_ be serious!”

“We aren’t going further until we can both get our shit together.”

“So what do we tell everyone?” Steve felt nauseous. “What do you want to do?”

Sharon was wiping the tears from her eyes, her heart crushed, “We tell them we’re cooling off until we can get our heads on straight.”

“Our wedding is in six months, Shar.” Steve reminded quietly, “How long do you want to put things on hold?”

“Until I know we can do this together; that you won’t shut me out.”

Steve ran his hand along his chin, teeth clenched in frustration.

Knowing when his arguments would only further aggravate the situation, when Sharon’s stubbornness had won him over, the alpha agreed to her terms. Sharon wasn’t cancelling the wedding all together, but she was going to put talk of the wedding on break until they could patch up the issues in their own relationship.

They were both beginning to wonder if their relationship was at a standstill- that the cracks couldn’t be repaired and they were at a make or break point.

The alpha stared at the fissure in Sharon’s windshield, wondering if their own situation could be fixed with a patch or if the damage was too far done.

*

 Sam came home from a long, grueling day at work to the sight of his roommate huddled on the couch with blankets and a beer. Two empty beer bottles littered the table, revealing the blonde had been in the same area for a while now. The alpha huffed a sigh and hung up his winter coat before approaching his roommate with hands placed sternly on his hips.

 “Should I be concerned?”

Steve’s lips thinned in a slight frown. “Sharon put the wedding on pause.”

Sam cursed and moved away, meandering to the fridge to grab two more beers. He set one in front of Steve and opened his own, preparing himself for the explanation to follow. Steve did follow through and explained his disastrous trip to the Carter’s, the ultimatum, the fight, the spin out, and Sharon’s break down.

By the end of it, Sam needed another beer to handle all of the information.

“So…to clear this up; The Carter’s are obviously pissed and both they and Sharon want Bucky out of the wedding.”

Steve shrugged dejectedly, “Sharon wants Bucky to step down as best man…She’s still not handling the news about the pup well, which I can’t blame her on. I’m the one in the wrong and I…I feel powerless, Sam. Sharon has been with me through thick and thin since college…supported me when I was first starting as an artist. She sacrificed a lot to be with a schmuck like me, and I’ve royally fucked it up. I’ve also made things worse for Bucky. I can’t win in this situation, Sam. I’m screwed either way. I lose either my fiancé or my best friend.”

“Good to know where I stand.” Sam bristled playfully.

“Bucky has a few years seniority on you, Sam. C’mon, don’t kick a guy while he’s already down…” There had been a longstanding joke of the rivalry between Sam and Bucky for who filled the ‘best friend’ role most fully. Steve had known Sam since college and the pair had been roommates for a few years since Steve graduated.

 “I have to defend my ego, thank you very much. You lapping me multiple times on our runs has a lasting effect. Even Riley pokes fun at me for it.”

A hint of a smile twitched on Steve’s lips. “I’m glad you two are doing so well.”

Sam didn’t want to rub his own relationship success in his disheartened friend’s face. “Look man, I know things are looking grim for you right now, but give each other some space and some time. I know you want to put the needs of Sharon and Bucky before your own, but you have to take care of yourself first and go with what is healthy for you.  What do _you_ want?”

Steve slouched into the couch, his head lying back tipsily. “I just want to make everyone happy.”

“No.” Sam groaned, “No, this is not about _other people_ right now. What do _you_ , _Steve Rogers,_ want more than anything in the world?”

Steve was quiet for a moment as he mulled over the question. For so long, he had put the emotional needs of others before himself. He leant it to his alpha tendencies of taking care of his whole pack and disregarding his own troubles in order to keep his loved ones content and safe. Now faced with an almost impossible situation, he knew he would be hurting someone in the process.

“I don’t know, Sam…” he confessed softly. “I just want Sharon and Bucky to be happy. I want to be the mate Sharon wants, and the best friend and support for Bucky, and a good father to our pup…”

The other alpha exhaled, “You won’t get all three, Steve. It’s not possible.”

“Sharon wants you to be the best man. She doesn’t want Bucky in the wedding.” Steve admitted painfully. “She’s always been distrustful of him, and now things are even worse. If Bucky wasn’t the best man, she would be happier, she said. But I can’t- I can’t _do_ that to him, Sam. I can’t hurt him.”

The blonde was teetering on a break down with the alcohol having done him no favors, other than airing out his pain and troubles. Sam reached over and took the nearly empty beer bottle to set it on the table. He quietly wished he hadn’t supplied Steve with another, as it was clearly obvious he had more to drink than what the empty bottles let on.

“Have you asked Bucky about the whole best man issue? I’m not saying I agree, but has he ever expressed to you how he feels on the matter?” Sam questioned carefully. Although he didn’t support the idea of replacing Bucky as the best man, he was curious to know what the omega thought on the subject.

“I _can’t_ , Sam. I could never hurt him like that.”

“I know, man, I know...I was just asking if Bucky knew about your situation; if he knew about this ultimatum.”

“No, I haven’t been able to bring up the subject. To be honest, I don’t want to talk to him about it because it sucks, Sam. It fucking sucks. He has every right to be there.”

“Again, I know, but he is carrying your kid and that makes for some Jerry Springer type of material.”

Steve groaned outright, “It’s not like that.”

“It kind of is.”  Sam raised a brow in amusement. “The universe has something foul against you. Your best man is pregnant with your kid…”

“We fucked up, but I don’t regret it, Sam. It wasn’t planned, but I’m excited to be a dad. I’m excited that it’s _Bucky_ , having my kid. _Our_ kid. How fucked is that?” Steve confessed.

“It’s kind of incestuous, actually. You said Bucky is like a brother-“

The blonde threw a pillow at the darker haired alpha.

Sam chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. “I get that whenever Bucky is the subject, it gets complicated. You’re one of those people who loves and gives everything away to those you care about, but you don’t think about yourself. Do you want to marry Sharon without any guilt towards your relationship with _her_ , while shaming Bucky? Or do you want to shame Sharon and feel no guilt towards _him_?”

Steve leaned forward, his head in his hands. “I can’t.”

“Or you could hurt everyone.” Sam suggested teasingly. “Pack a few bags, move to another city and start a new life. Forget about all of us. Change your name.”

The other alpha could at least snort in amusement to the suggestion. “I need a vacation to clear my head.”

It wasn’t a cure-all, but it was at least something to deter Steve’s mind from agonizing and overthinking his situation.

*

It wasn’t meant for him.

He knew it, but he had excused himself to wash his hands and had dashed across to the hallway closet to grab a new container of soap, leaving the sink water running, when he heard Sam and Riley speaking to one another in hushed tones.

“What do you mean Steve hasn’t _told_ him yet?”

“He doesn’t want to stress him out.” Sam defended.

“He has a right to know, even if it’s not his wedding on the line.” Riley disagreed, “Seriously Sam, you have a _degree_ in this.”

“Look, imagine your best friend asks you not to be the best man in his wedding anymore. How upsetting is that? Especially considering his condition.”

Riley made an indecisive noise. “I get your point, but honesty is still the best policy.”

“It’s just a white lie.”

“ _White lie_?! Does he even know the extent? I doubt those two are going to go through with the wedding.”

“Shhh, keep it down. We’ll talk about this later.”

“You bet your perfect ass we will.”

Bucky stood frozen for a few seconds, mind racing. As if on auto-pilot, he retrieved the new soap dispenser and finished washing his hands before coming out, schooling his face into one of indifference even though he wanted to demand information. The three of them picked up their original conversation of planning out Steve’s bachelor party, but the omega felt tight hot knots in his stomach as he thought about the whispered conversation he was never meant to hear.

He pretended he hadn’t heard it, and instead decided to make a more rash decision to get straight to the truth.

*

He called Sharon.

It was perhaps not his best move, but it alarmed him that his best friend wasn’t sharing much in the way of detailed news to him on the wedding and what Steve and Sharon’s relationship status even was. If the fellow omega was so upset by the thought of Bucky being the best man, then he would step down to lessen the drama over the situation.

“Bucky?” Sharon answered in a tone of voice that was unable to mask her surprise. “Is everything okay?”

“Hey, yeah. Everything is fine.” Bucky felt infinitely uncomfortable and cowardly for doing this over the phone, but he didn’t want to face her in person and allow her to see the pain and uncertainty in his eyes. “Look, Steve hasn’t been telling me everything and I wanted to clear up the air over the misunderstanding.”

“Misunderstanding?” the fellow omega sounded wary.

“If you don’t want me in the wedding, I can step down, it’s okay.” Bucky felt his heart hammering rapidly as he pushed through his rehearsed speech, “Steve is a good man and he loves you. You both deserve to be together. If my being in the wedding makes you uncomfortable, it’s not a problem to ask someone else to take my place instead. I’ll probably be too big to be up there anyways.”

“Bucky-I- are you _sure_?”

“Can I still attend the wedding, at least?”

There was a silence on the other line and for a moment, the pregnant omega thought the blonde hung up on him.

“Sharon?” he ventured weakly.

“Yes, of course. You should be there with your family.” She permitted.

“Okay…thank you.”

There was some hesitation in her voice as an uncomfortable lull came between them. “Did Steve put you up to this?”

“No. I know you’ve been going through a rough patch and if it gives you peace of mind to not have my pregnant ass up there with you guys, I’m willing to do that.”

“Bucky-“

“I may go into labor early or be put on bed rest- it makes more sense that someone who is _capable_ should be there to help.” Bucky’s hand was shaking from the self-inflicted hurt of the conversation. “I’ll be more comfortable sitting.”

He was thankful he couldn’t see Sharon’s reaction.

“I’ll tell Steve.” Sharon breathed out slowly. “He’s going to be distraught with you.”

“He’s a meatball, let him be upset. He should’ve asked me weeks ago.” Bucky tried for nonchalance, but he didn’t have Steve’s fiancé convinced. “I feel better without the responsibility.”

“Well...thank you. Look, I need to get going, talk to you soon?” Sharon expressed.

The pair exchanged goodbyes and as Bucky hung up, Clint stared bullets into the back of his head. Bucky nearly jumped when he noticed the man leaning against the kitchen island.

“I hope you know what you’re doing.”

Bucky couldn’t meet his eyes, “It’s the right thing to do.”

“Is it?” Clint straightened himself up and took a sip of his hot tea.

The omega frowned and left the room, sequestering himself to his bedroom and away from the judgement of others for the rest of the afternoon. It was childish, but he was content to disappear in the haze of Netflix on his laptop while he tried not to think of Steve, Sharon, or of the reaction of their friends.

Even when Natasha carefully entered his room to bring a plate of dinner, he was resolute that he didn’t want to talk about his decision with Sharon. Thankfully, Natasha didn’t push the issue as she pulled a blanket over her lap and quietly watched a movie with him.

Bucky knew a lecture was coming, but for now, Natasha would hold off until he was ready. She knew when to pry and when to exact patience.

*

Steve _was_ livid.

He came home from work to be met with Sharon in his living room, who told him all about her strange conversation with Bucky earlier in the day. He couldn’t believe it at first; that Bucky would freely, without influence, call to tell his fiancé that he was stepping down as the best man. It wasn’t in character and immediately red warning bells went off in his head.

He knew Sharon hadn’t initiated the call. He knew she would never bully Bucky or cross a line to deliberately hurt him and force him to do something.

Steve’s most reliable guess was that Bucky must’ve heard it from another source somehow, but trying to find out who would prove useless as Bucky would keep his lips and words more heavily guarded and sealed than Fort Knox. Steve texted Sam and Riley, who both swore that they hadn’t shared any information of that kind with him.

“This is wrong!” Steve was shaking his head as he paced in front of his fiancé.

“ _He_ called _me_. I had no idea what it was about, but he went straight to it.”

“I don’t-“

“I said he could still attend the wedding. He said he wasn’t comfortable being the best man.” Sharon explained. “To be honest, it that’s how he feels, I’m obviously okay with that.”

“Of course you’d be.” Steve grumbled.

“Hey, don’t get snappy with me!” the omega crossed her arms in defiance.

“If he can’t be in the wedding party, then I don’t want a bunch of groomsmen. I don’t want- I don’t want our wedding to be a big pageant.” Steve was running his hand through his hair, stressed. “I never wanted a big wedding-“

“Then we’ll downsize. We haven’t sent out the official invitations yet, so it’s possible.” Sharon shifted her hands to her hips, “Without him on the altar, my family will be more at ease. We can start planning again.”

Steve’s shoulder sagged, his stomach churning at the thought of how pleased her family would be now that Bucky had stepped down. He shook his head.

“He’s still the best man, to me.” Steve stubbornly declared. “I’m not asking anyone else to be the best man because Bucky’s it.”

“Fine. If you won’t ask Sam, _I_ will.” Sharon threatened.

“I don’t want a best man _or_ a maid of honor!”

“If you’re going to be a jackass about this, I’m leaving. Call me when you straighten out your priorities.” Sharon growled as she snatched her purse off of the table. “He was the one that stepped down, Steve! Honor his wishes, goddammit. In case you forgot, _I’m_ your fiancé! Unless _that_ needs to change, too!”

She slammed the door as she left, rattling some of the picture frames on the wall and leaving Steve to pinch the bridge of his nose as he counted to 100 to quell his fury and frustration.

*

Natasha answered the door at 10pm to a very irritated blonde alpha.

“I could smell your stench as soon as you entered the building.” Natasha greeted.

“Did Bucky tell you what he did?” there was a slight twitch to Steve’s eye.

“You should come back tomorrow when you do not smell like you’re out for blood.” The redhead suggested simply. “I know what he did and while I don’t agree with it, he’s being persistent. You can’t change his mind.”

“I want him to know that we’re downsizing the wedding- he’s still the best man to me, but I’ll honor whatever conditions he has.”

“I’m still going to be there.” Bucky was wrapped in a blanket as he advanced towards the door, causing both of the alphas to turn to him in surprise. “I just decided I don’t want to look like a fat penguin while I’m there.”

“Then wear casual wear or a moo-moo, I don’t care.” Steve pleaded.

“You’re getting upset over nothing. I’m still coming, but I agree with Sharon; being the best man is a little out of my capabilities when I’ll be 9 months pregnant.”

“Agree with her? Did she put you up to this?” the blond alpha wouldn’t let the wording slip past him.

“Christ, Rogers, it’s fine-“

“No, I’m still putting you down as the best man on the program. I don’t- I couldn’t live with myself if you-“ Steve’s breathing grew shaky as his defenses began to break down. Natasha’s brows rose as she watched the man break down in front of them as weeks of stress, defeat, and hurt began to break and thaw.

His practiced, perfect composure broke.

Although Bucky had been acting so nonchalant about the whole situation, it had been eating him away as he thought about everything he’d been through with Steve. He prayed that he was making the right decision to support Steve and Sharon on their journey to getting married and becoming mates. As he watched the redhead lead his lifelong friend to the couch where he could properly hunch his shoulders and let out the weeks of pent-up emotions, the brunette began to have second thoughts.

His grandmother’s words radiated throughout his mind and down to his heart, causing such ache and _desire_ to be more than just a best man.

_More than just a friend._

He wondered if he could ever muster up the words and actions from within to be so brave and courageous; to unabashedly go for what his heart truly ached for: Steve. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gratuitous amounts of italics. XD  
> Thank you everyone for the kind words, encouragement, and for your mutual love of Stucky! I have so much fun in this fandom and you are all so awesome. <3  
> The baby’s themed room was a cute idea from Captain_QuickHawk_RumBuck. <3 Thank you for the inspiration!
> 
> Next Chapter: Steve’s break down, exes, baby-proofing, and nesting.  
> [My tumblr](http://valkyriegail76.tumblr.com/)  
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/AmethystValkyri)  
> 


	6. Grasp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Any New Year’s resolutions?” Steve asked.  
> The omega chuckled, “I have a few.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Un-betaed, so any mistakes are 100% my own!

Bucky felt helpless as he watched Steve Rogers break down in front of him and Natasha in their apartment living room. The alpha was adamant in having the brunette in the wedding, which was going well over the omega’s head as he attempted to reassure his best friend that it wasn’t necessary. This whole time the omega thought he was doing the groom a favor by keeping him in the good graces of his fiancé, but it seemed he ended up making things _worse_.

It had hurt to step down, but it gave him more peace of mind that it would settle some of the drama going on between him and Sharon.

Apparently, he hadn’t put Steve’s feelings into consideration.

“There’s no need to be upset, Steve. It’s not a big deal.” Bucky tried to make light of the situation, but Natasha’s severe glare told him this wasn’t the time for self-depreciation.

The brunette ignored her and persisted, “It’s the right decision and it’ll make your fiancé and her family happy. I’m going to be too uncomfortable or even on bedrest, so it only makes sense.”

“It’s not- it’s not just _that_ , Buck. I’m exhausted. I don’t know what to do anymore.” Steve confessed brokenly. “I’m tired of trying to make amends with Sharon. It feels like everything I do, say, or try just upsets her more. My mind feels fucked.”

“Then this best man thing should make her happy.”

Steve shook his head, “It’s not a dealing chip. Never was to begin with.”

“So where does this put you two now?” Natasha questioned carefully.

Steve laughed, but it was devoid of humor or his good natured smile, “Hell if I know…We argued about it and she stormed out. To be fair, I’m still really pissed off about it and I admit, I didn’t help the situation.”

“Did you break up?” the red haired alpha probed.

Steve shrugged.

It wasn’t a yes or a no.

Bucky was ashamed to admit that his heart nearly skipped a beat. He was ashamed of himself for feeling a small bout of pleasure that Steve could be free of the ties he had made with Sharon, but at the same time, the alpha had been with his girlfriend for _years_. It wasn’t something a person could just come out of, free of marks.

“So what happens now?” Clint asked from the hallway, his shoulder leaning against the archway. He was out of bed now, still in his pajamas and looking just as concerned as his redhead alpha mate despite his sleepy eyes.

“I…don’t know.” Steve cringed. “We need some time to cool off and I wanted to see Bucky because…well, fuck, I don’t-“ the blonde groaned, “I wanted to convince him to still be in the wedding, but now…”

It went unsaid that there might not even _be_ a wedding anymore.

Clint wandered to the fridge, pulled out a bottle of apple cider, and popped off the top. “What you need is a vacation. You need to clear your head.”

“I can’t afford a vacation.”

“Yes, you can. You just choose to never take vacations.” Natasha frowned. “You need to get away and get yourself sorted. You’re a mess.”

“I was going to use our vacation time for our…our honeymoon.”

“It’s more important that you pull yourself together now and get your head sorted. “ Clint decided for the alpha as he came around and poured some cider into cups.

He distributed them to each of the grim looking friends.

“Why are you giving us cider? We need tequila for this.” Natasha grumbled.

“I’m being conscientious of the pregnant vessel.” Clint tilted his head towards the omega.

Bucky smirked.

“Cheers, to Steve’s well-being and possible singlehood!” Clint proposed. The four of them clinked cups awkwardly and sipped at the sparkling cider.

Steve drank, looking embarrassed and somewhat resigned as he downed his cup.

The friends moved to the couch for Steve to explain what had happened and vent about his relationship with Sharon. By this point, Natasha snuck in the tequila bottle while Bucky was gifted the rest of the apple cider to consume.

When the tequila came out, Steve’s words also poured with it.

The friends retold dating stories, dished out relationship advice, and shared pet peeves they had with lovers from their pasts.

It was a night to stick close and cheer Steve up while he was seemingly at his lowest and most vulnerable. The blonde alpha wasn’t sure if he was still engaged, and as he sat around drinking with his closest friends, brows scrunched, he confessed ( _drunkenly_ ) openly, “…I don’t know if I even _want_ to marry her. Maybe I just thought I had to because we’ve been dating for so long; that I owe it to her. Does that make sense?”

Natasha, face a lovely shade of rose from the alcohol, nodded solemnly, “It’s understandable. More importantly, do you _love_ her? After all of these years, do you still see yourself being with her for the long haul?”

Bucky, the only sober one out of the four, stared at Steve from the side with a schooled, neutral mask. His heart was beating rapidly in his chest as he grasped his apple cider. It was the question that had been haunting him since he had first found out Steve was dating the blonde omega years ago.

There was silence for a moment and then:

“No.” Steve’s face creased in misery. “No, I don’t.”

The alcohol only encouraged for Steve’s unsuppressed emotions to rise to the surface. Clint patted his shoulder and poured another round of shots for Steve, Nat, and himself.

Steve downed the alcohol quickly and hissed from the sting of it.

“The heart wants what the heart wants.” Natasha stated sagely, looking the most composed out of the three drunks.

“Better you realize it now instead of at or after the wedding.” Clint added. “Could you imagine having to go through a divorce with the Carters down your back? Yikes.”

Steve winced, “They aren’t all that terrible…”

“Peggy is excluded.” Natasha corrected. “She is the exception to the rule, but Sharon’s parents are a _nightmare_. I’m sorry Steve, but you _know_ it’s true.”

Steve went to pour himself another shot, but Bucky reached out to him, hand coming over the glass.

“How about we get some water in you, champ? You’re getting a little too tipsy.” Bucky suggested softly.

The alpha relaxed as he looked towards his best friend. “Yea…you’re probably right.”

The pregnant omega maneuvered himself off of the couch and shuffled to the kitchen to procure three water bottles. He passed them out to his friends, ordering all of them to drink before consuming anymore liquor.

He also grabbed some chips and salsa from the pantry.

_(They were more for him and his cravings, but he was willing to share…)_

“What will everyone think when I step down from the engagement?” Steve was still mulling over his future, eyebrows creased as he scooped a chip into the thick salsa.

“Screw ‘em!” Clint exclaimed, “It’s _your_ life, Steve. You can’t live it making others happy. _Especially_ when it comes to marriage. You both need to be fully committed, and you can’t make-“ The brunette hiccupped, “-others happy if you yourself are not happy first.”

“You would be doing Sharon a disservice to marry her if you’re only doing it because it’s what she wants. Besides, when’s the last time you two even had _good sex_?” Natasha raised a perfectly arched brow towards the alpha.

Steve nearly choked, his face deepening to a bright hue of pink.

Bucky blushed as well as a flash of a memory reminded him that blush went down and _all over._

The alpha cleared his throat, “Uh- it’s definitely been- a while, I guess.”

“See? If you don’t want to make love night and day, then something is wrong. People who are about to seal the deal are stupidly, vomit-enducingly cute and lovey. You and Sharon have only looked constipated and frustrated.” Clint stated.

“Though you were excellent actors at the engagement party.” Natasha added.

Steve ran his hands down his face, “This is such a mess…”

“It could be worse.” Bucky shrugged. “You could already be married. Or _she_ could be pregnant.”

The blonde groaned while Clint and Natasha laughed. The joke hadn’t been all that funny, but the booze was enough to smooth all of the rough edges and lighten their moods.

“So is that it? Are you and Shar done?” Clint questioned when the awkwardness had died down.

The blonde ran his hand behind his neck, the wound of his possible ‘break-up’ still too fresh and new to comprehend fully.

“I think so…?” He sulked back into the couch. “Even if things haven’t been great…we were still together for years. This is going to be so weird.”

“Or freeing.” Natasha downed another shot of tequila and sighed when she set the empty liquor bottle on the coffee table.

The loud clink of the glass on wood seemed more like a nail to the coffin of Steve’s ex-relationship.

*

The blonde alpha’s eyes were having trouble staying open as Clint had decided to put on _Ghostbusters_ to drown out the melancholy surrounding the man. Even if the break-up would be good for him in the long run, it was still difficult to separate from someone who’d been a part of his life for years.

Bucky brought out the blankets from the hallway closet to drape over his friends. Clint and Natasha snuggled up on the recliner, her head pillowed on his chest while the two fell asleep not even halfway through the movie.

As for the blonde, he sat beside Bucky on the couch, leaning back into the reclining portion while Bucky pulled his feet underneath him. He was leaning towards the alpha, the pair of them still snacking on some Doritos.

Steve cleared his voice, somewhat bashful as he spoke, “I appreciate what you were intending to do with Shar…It was selfless of you, but you know I’ll always want you to be there.”

Bucky stiffened as he glanced over to the alpha.

He knew Steve was still drunk, and he wasn’t ready to venture into territory he didn’t yet feel ready for. Especially with the blonde not fully sober.

The last time they had been like this…

_Well._

Bucky ran his hand over the small swell of his abdomen.

“Don’t worry about it, Rogers.”

Steve wasn’t done, though, “You’ve always had my back through everything. I promise I’ll be a better friend; I promise I’ll be there for you and our son.”

The omega, gods help him, couldn’t resist the warmth and affection in Steve’s voice. He crept closer, sidling up with Steve on the couch. They stretched out on the couch close together, watching the movie quietly.

Bucky was content with the closeness and the reassuring scent of the alpha. Even though it wasn’t sexual by any means, it felt good to rest his head against Steve’s shoulder and share some body heat.

“I’ll be there for you too, Steve.” The omega whispered in the confines of their closeness.

Steve hummed a sleep reply, his body already lax with sleep.

*

With all of the drama going on, the group nearly forgot about New Year’s Eve. 

The news had spread amongst the friend group that Steve and Sharon were on the outs, so plans were made accordingly to keep the pair separated to avoid unnecessary (and uncomfortable) confrontations and drama. Steve bemoaned the setup and the extra fuss it took for his friends to ‘take sides’, but he was relieved he wouldn’t have another stressor on top of everything else. Despite the holidays, he still had work deadlines to attend to.

Janet agreed to throw her own house party where Sharon could attend with a smaller group of their friends.

This left Steve to attend Tony’s rooftop penthouse party with Sam, Riley, Natasha, Clint, and Bucky.

 Many of their mutual friends were in attendance, and unbeknownst to Steve, the subject of Sharon or weddings were off the table. Tony was in as much of cahoots with this plan as everyone else and they wanted to ensure the alpha wouldn’t mope around the building, spoiling the fun and cheer that should’ve been the party.

Bucky was happy to be the designated ’Steve babysitter’; making sure he ate enough, drank water, and also wasn’t shy to use the bar.

It was a freezing December night, but Bucky felt warm whenever he was close to Steve.

It felt good to keep the stressful topics at bay as the group hovered around the Cards Against Humanity nook where they could sit around the table with other party goers and play games.

Tony had gone all out (as per usual) and there were plenty of ‘activities’ to partake in, but Steve was happy to play cards and board games, away from the dancing and rowdier behavior.

As the New Year’s countdown neared, couples began to pair off and close the small gaps between them; whispers and romantic gestures as they said goodbye to the last year in preparation for the new.

Steve leaned his arms against the railing, overlooking the night sky where fireworks would soon bloom bright with the stars. When Bucky approached with the champagne for the toast (his own a flute of apple cider), the alpha smiled thankfully and took it.

“Any New Year’s resolutions?” Steve asked.

The omega chuckled, “I have a few.”

The alpha bumped his shoulder lightly to Bucky’s right. “Aww c’mon, you can’t leave me hangin’. What are they?”

Steve was only slightly inebriated; enough so to feel relaxed and somewhat at peace with the turmoil of his relationship with Sharon. The night had been perfect so far with his friends, all of them reminders of how much support he had.

Bucky licked his lips, glancing up at the sky. He felt like a teenager again with the change in the wind. “Re-learn guitar, get a good prosthetic. Most of all, I want to be a good parent. Have a good pregnancy, have a healthy baby.”

“You _stole_ mine.” Steve groaned.

“A good pregnancy?”

“No! To be a good dad.” He straightened, wistful, “My dad wasn’t around a lot growing up. He and mom always got into it when I was little due to his alcoholism, and then he died…I didn’t really have a father figure, other than George. I want to be a good dad for our son. Give him what I never fully had and always wanted.”

The brunette was silent for a moment as he took in the alpha’s words.

They stood comfortably next to each other as they heard the countdown and the uproar of the crowds below.

10!

9!

8!

“Steve?”

The blonde hummed. “Yea?”

5!

4!

The brunette turned the alpha to face him, pulling him from his thoughts.

Steve’s eyes traced over the omega’s face, surprised as he tried to discern if what was happening, was indeed about to happen.

“Buck?”

3!

2!

 Bucky took the plunge and leaned in, pushing an inch up on his feet, his right hand cradling Steve’s face as he closed the gap and kissed him.

All thoughts fell to the wayside as everything focused into this one moment.

The omega didn’t give a damn about Sharon, proper protocol, or decorum.

He _wanted_ the alpha.

Steve was conflicted at first; shock and surprise mixing with arousal and open _want_.

The alpha’s right hand rested at Bucky’s hip, keeping him steady while his left hand came up to cradle to back of the brunette’s head, keeping him close as their lips glided softly against one another’s in breathless motions.

The closeness was all consuming and when they broke the kiss to catch their breath, Steve was a bright red blushing mess, while Bucky echoed the sentiment with his own rosy cheeks.

They both knew it wasn’t from the cold.

“No one should go without a New Year’s kiss.” Bucky clarified as he righted himself and tried to catch his breath. “Happy New Year, Stevie.”

“Wow…Happy New Year, Buck.” The alpha replied, eyes bright with surprise. He leaned in again, placing a soft, chaste kiss to the omega’s warmed lips.

“ _GET IT, ROGERS_!” Tony yelled from the top of his lungs, across the walkway where Pepper and Rhodey were both trying to quiet him while he giggled incessantly. 

The pair pulled away quickly, Bucky laughing and pushing his forehead against Steve’s chest and burying his face away from the embarrassment. Steve was chuckling as well as he wrapped his arms around Bucky’s shoulders to shield him from the cold.

“Was that okay?” the omega asked nervously.

“That was okay, Buck.” Steve reassured him as he ran one hand soothingly across the omega’s back.

“Because I figure we’re already having a baby together so what’s a kiss, right? I’ve had worse things of yours in my mouth or on my lips before.”

Steve grumbled, “ _Buck_ -“

“And these hormones have been making me want to kiss you for _forever_ , and I’m sorry if that’s not what you wanted, and I _really_ don’t want to be a rebound-“

“It was _fine_ , you jerk.  Now could you stop and enjoy the moment, _please_?” Steve lifted Bucky’s chin to look up at the fireworks illuminating the New York skyline.

The pair watched the sky in awe, joined then by some of their friends as they huddled close together to ward off the cold. Bucky turned in Steve’s arms, looking up with his head resting on Steve’s chest.

The closeness was a new, uncharted territory, and Bucky inwardly thanked Grandma Barnes and Becca for being the inner voices to spur him on.

He wasn’t about to speed forth headlong for Steve’s affection, but the gentleness between them now was welcome and refreshing. Steve melted into the simpler gestures and although they didn’t kiss again, they knew the affection was mutual.

Later on, as the night was dying down, Steve squeezed Bucky’s hand as they stood out on the sidewalk, waiting for a cab. Sam, Riley, Nat, and Clint stood off to the side conversing in a small circle, giving the pair some semblance of privacy.

The alpha exhaled.

“Buck, you know I’m a mess right now.” The alpha explained quietly, “I appreciate the kiss tonight, but if you want anything more with me, I’m going to ask if you can be patient as I sort through some things first. If you want to give…whatever _this_ is a shot, I want to do it right. ”

The brunette wasn’t expecting Steve to get over his ex-fiance so easily. He knew he had thrown the alpha an unfair curveball by kissing him after the countdown. Steve had only been separated from Sharon for a few days now.

Bucky felt the tell-tale butterflies fluttering in his stomach. “I care about you, Stevie. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t interested in exploring what we could be together. The attraction is there.”

It felt so weird, so foreign to talk about their feelings to one another. It was just like them to make such confessions on a cold, busy New York street.

The blonde nodded, biting his lip, “Trust me, I know…and I do feel the same way. But I couldn’t in good conscience start anything with you until I’m all sorted through and ready.”

“How long do you need?”

Steve sighed, “I don’t know…For so long I’ve seen you as a friend and these past few weeks…well, that’s changed, obviously. And now tonight? I’m a little out of sorts. Not in a bad way, or course, but this is all extremely new.”

Bucky nodded, understanding where the blonde was coming from. Two weeks ago he was planning a wedding with Sharon, and now he was kissing his best friend.  It was a little disorienting for both of them and if he were being honest with himself, Bucky felt like he needed some time to get his feelings in order as well.

“So I’m guessing I can’t invite you to sleep over?” Bucky snickered.

Steve laughed, shaking his head, “I think it’d be best if I slept in my _own_ bed tonight. You’re a little _too_ tempting, Bucky Barnes.”

The words pleased the omega. “I can _behave_. I promise.”

Steve waved him off with a chuckle. He hugged the omega, kissing the top of his head as the taxi cab pulled up for him, Sam, and Riley.

“Text me when you get home safe?” Steve asked hopefully.

Bucky nodded, waving goodbye as he stood back to rejoin the smirking redhead behind him. Natasha seemed all too pleased as they watched the alpha load up with his roommates and leave.

“You don’t wait, do you?” Natasha teased.

“It’s New Years!” Bucky reminded her.

“It was cute.” Clint couldn’t stop smiling, partly because he was the most inebriated out of the group. “I can appreciate a person who goes after what they want.”

“A good start to the new year?” the older alpha queried.

Bucky couldn’t wipe the smile from his face as butterflies swarmed in his stomach.

*

Sam stumbled into the taxi cab and groaned as Riley poked him, holding out his hand. Steve looked over at the couple in amusement.

“Are you for real right now?” Sam growled as he tried to right his head from the spins and looked between Riley and his roommate.

“We had a bet, _dear_.” Riley reminded.

Grumbling, Sam pulled out his wallet and forked over $40 to his mate. Riley pocketed the cash with a smug grin.  

“What was the bet for?” Steve asked, lost.

Riley announced, “I bet $40 that Bucky would make a move on you tonight. Sam bet me it would take until Valentine’s Day.”

“I didn’t think Barnes had it in him!” the darker skinned alpha squawked.

Steve sunk lower in his seat, utterly mortified.

*

_Then_

One of Steve’s biggest regrets in life was that he wasn’t right by Bucky’s side when the omega finally did awaken from his long medically induced coma.

It wasn’t by choice, as the hospital had sent him home when visitor’s hours were over, but it still grated on his conscience.

He had gone to the hospital once a day, every day since Bucky was returned to the United States and allowed visitors to sit with him bedside while he was in his deep sleep.

Days spent where Steve read _Dune_ and _The War of the Worlds_ in the light blue room with only the beeping of the machines echoing in the background.

The alpha had held his hand, running his fingers over the callouses of his fingertips while averting his eyes from the mangled bandages on Bucky’s left side.

Of course, when the omega _was_ finally ready to come back to the land of the living, it was without the comfort of loves ones by his bed.

Bucky awoke in the early hours or the morning, thrashing and screaming as he tried to right himself and get out of the hospital room. He wasn’t used to the sterile scents of the hospital and it ended up taking a full team of nurses and a doctor to finally calm him down from his crying and screaming.

It was ultimately the familiarity of Sarah Rogers’s scent that pacified him.

Steve waited in the hospital lobby for hours while the Barnes family went in and out, taking their time with Bucky as the family spoke with doctors on their fallen family member’s condition.

A long recovery ahead.

Full memory still intact.

Diagnosis of post-traumatic stress disorder.

Due to Steve not being family, he was given scent blocking deodorant to wear so that he wouldn’t flood Bucky’s senses with his alpha presence. It seemed ridiculous to the alpha at first, but Bucky’s body was experiencing an influx of senses and without his heat suppressant, a viable alpha could trigger less than desirable outcomes.

Bucky noticed it the moment he stepped in.

“Did they seriously give you that crap to wear?” Bucky groaned from where he was laying on the bed, tired eyes tracking the blonde’s movements.

The flood of relief and overwhelming _joy_ to have Bucky alive, awake, and already sassing him caused the younger man’s throat to choke with emotion. He moved to the omega’s bedside, ignoring the smell of hospital and pain that burned his nose.

“I thought I lost you…” He whispered around the welling of sentiments in his chest.

Bucky reached his right hand out, taking Steve’s weakly. “I was in hell, Rogers. I was in hell and it chewed me up and _spat_ me out.”

 “I know…we were in hell without you, Buck. There was a memorial for you and-“ Steve stopped himself, careful to not put the brunette in more distress than he already was.  The alpha reigned in his emotions, even as his eyes watered. “The doctors said you have a long recovery. I want you to know I’ll be with you every step of the way, Buck…”

The omega smirked, sighing, “I tried to get the fuck out of this room and I ate the floor. My balance is completely fucked, Steve.”

The blonde smiled, “I’ll just have to be the smooth one from now on.”

“Pft, that’s a definite stretch.” The brunette ran his thumb along the back of Steve’s hand, where their skin touched, “The drugs they have me on got me feeling woozy. None of this feels real.”

“Take all the time you need. One step at a time.”

They stayed together for hours; the alpha holding on to Bucky’s hand, the omega squeezing back as if the blonde was his lifeline to the real world.

Over the next few weeks, _months_ , Steve Rogers made it his life mission to support his best friend in his recovery and assimilation into civilian life.

It was a long, difficult road filled with many lows, but the blonde was up for the challenge.

Each time Bucky fell, he was there to help him back on his feet.

*

_Now_

It was mid-January and after days spent in radio silence, Sharon texted Steve to ask if they could meet at her apartment to ‘talk’.

Steve knew this day was coming.

He wasn’t blind.

He had been preparing for it while he kept a low profile from their friends and focused on getting ahead on his deadlines while simultaneously processing his feelings.

It was safe to say that over the past few weeks since their last argument, Steve had been very productive with his art due to all of the quiet and downtime.

The alpha still spoke to Bucky every day, but the two hadn’t discussed their New Year’s kiss any further.

Steve wanted to get his head sorted, while Bucky focused on doing much the same thing.

To the alpha, it wasn’t fair to pursue anything relationship wise until he knew where he stood with everyone.

_Where he stood with Sharon._

*

Sharon greets him without a smile or a kiss.

Despite some of the joyful moments that had happened to Steve over the past few weeks, his heart clenches as he is reminded of his failed relationship with Sharon, the person he has spent _years_ with.

 As he enters, he notices that all of his things are in a box on the kitchen table.

That there are other boxes around the apartment.

“So I heard you had a good New Year.” Sharon crosses her arms as she takes in her estranged lover, lips thinned into a straight line. As threatening as she is trying to look, Steve can still see the puffy redness of her eyes.

“Yeah.” Steve scratched the back of his head and decides to assume that Sharon already knows Bucky kissed him. “How was yours?”

Sharon turns her back to him and goes to the fridge, fishing out two water bottles. She slides one to the alpha from across the kitchen counter.

“You know, it’s kind of a slap to the face to find out your fiancé was _making out_ with his baby mama. I always knew things between you two weren’t right, and I shouldn’t have extended this for as long as I did.” She scoffs, shaking her head, “You’re a real fucking asshole, Steve Rogers.”

He doesn’t have it in him to argue.

His fingers pick at the cold labeling on the water bottle.

They are quiet for a moment as they both mull over the situation. Steve glances around the apartment, eyebrows creased, “You’re moving.”

It isn’t a question. He can tell with the way her items have been packed neatly; carefully to help with a fresh start somewhere away from the apartment that held so many memories.

“Isn’t that a little extreme?” The alpha adds. He knows he probably shouldn’t criticize, but it all seems like too much.

“No, not since I’m going to DC.”

He straightens, eyes sharp as he looks to her, “ _What_?”

Sharon recaps her bottle after taking a long drink. “I accepted a promotion to the DC office before Christmas. I’m not stupid; I could see the signs that this was falling apart.”

“You accepted it when we were still together?” Despite understanding why she would’ve done so, it still hurt to know she had been planning this to some extent.

“So this is it.” Sharon didn’t seem surprised that this had formed into the swift blow

To his credit, Steve did his best to look Sharon in the eyes and accept the hurt that the separation bloomed in him. As he looked at the blonde omega and thought of what he had shared with her, he felt lucky, but at the same time, wondered why he hadn’t realized it before.

He loved Sharon in the way a person loved a wild thing.

She was so far beyond his reach, and he loved her for it. Loved her spirit, her drive, and the selflessness she had shown when helping her loved ones.

She had also been self-centered at times; difficult and impossible to argue with when all she ever saw (or wanted to see) were her side of things.

Steve wanted there to be a slap; wanted there to be some kind of physical hurt beside the feeling of failure washing over him.

_It was over._

“I’ll call and cancel the venues; the caterer, the photographer-“ her voice wavered only slightly,

Steve wasn’t sure what to say to that. He ran his hands over his face, exhausted with everything. “How are we going to break the news to everyone?”

“We just do.” The blonde omega pushed her hair out of her face, just wanting to give her hands something to do. “There’s no proper protocal for break-ups.”

“I’m sorry about everything, Sharon…I’m sorry things played out the way they did.”

“No, you’re not.” Sharon shot back. “You get Bucky and a child out of the deal. It’s everything you wanted.”

“Sharon-“

“ _Fuck you_ , Steve. You got the better end of the stick and you know it.”

The alpha looked pained, the failure of their engagements and years together down the drain dragging his resolve. He knew Sharon was on the defense, and she had every right to be in the face of such a life altering break up. However, Steve couldn’t help but to feel his own anger towards the situation.

“You accepted the transfer to DC knowing it would be a make or break deal, didn’t you? You didn’t care if I was coming with you or not.” he accused.

“So what if I did? Your recent antics have made it _painfully_ clear where your priorities are. I couldn’t leave myself in limbo, wondering whose side you were on. It had to be this way. I needed to think of my own future.”

“I’m having a _child_ , Sharon. I’m going to be a father-“

Sharon interrupted, her voice louder, “And that’s great, Steve, that’s just _fantastic_ , but if you really loved me, we would’ve made it work. The problem is that you’re in love with _someone else_. Someone who can appeal to your alpha need to fuck and breed-“

Steve reeled back, stepping away from the kitchen island that separated them. It felt like miles apart as he ran his hands through his hair. He glared back at his ex-fiancé, “I am not some _knotheaded_ -“

“Bullshit, Steve!” Sharon threw her hands up in exasperation, “I turned a blind eye to the way you looked at James for years, but it hasn’t gone away. I will never be able to compare to him-“ Her voice tightened with emotion as years’ worth of insecurities and unhappiness festered to the surface. “ _Fuck you_ , Steve Rogers.”

The alpha’s lips were in a thin line as thoughts tormented his mind.

How long had Sharon felt this way?

How long had she harbored this abhorrence to Bucky?

_How long had he been blind?_

“I don’t know what more to say, Sharon.” He confessed, jaw tight and eyes hardened to fight back the sting of tears threatening to cloud his sight. He had been put up against the wall and after weeks of trying to make things work, of seeing a couple’s councilor, of humiliation from the Carter’s, of whispers behind his back from their friends, of pulling himself back from Bucky…it was over.

Years of his life felt like they had melted away, but he couldn’t pull himself up to say they had been a waste. When the times were good, they had been very good together.

But now…

Steve pocketed his phone from the kitchen island and looked up to his now ex.

“I hope you find happiness, Shar. I hope your promotion and the transfer to DC is a success.”

Sharon wasn’t budging an inch from her spot as she stared him down, posture straight and somewhat threatening. A flash of hurt crossed her eyes before she turned herself back to business, devoid of emotions. “I’ll make the calls tomorrow and cancel the plans. We’ll lose our deposits, but at least we’ll be out of this fucking mess.”

Steve nodded. “Let me know if you need...if you want help.”

He took out his keys and pulled off the spare he had to Sharon’s apartment.

He set it on the counter.

The clink of metal on granite was deafening.

As he turned, Sharon spoke, her own hurt finally seeping through the cracks.

“I did want to have kids, Steve” She confessed in the chasm of their distance. “I wanted to have kids with _you_ , but I _can’t_. My genetics decided that for me.”

Steve turned to look at her, open evident on his face, ‘Why didn’t you tell me?”

Sharon ignored his question, “When I found out Bucky was pregnant with your twins, I was livid. He could give you what you always wanted, while I couldn’t. I knew the moment you told me that I had lost you to him.”

“Sharon…”

“Get out.” Sharon growled. “I should have never given this a second chance to begin with.”

It was a dismissal.

Steve had nothing else to say as he backed away and left the apartment that had held so many memories; all of the good and the bad. As soon as he shut the door behind him, there was the unmistakable sound of locks turning as Sharon barred him any further from his life.

The walk to the elevator and subsequent ride to the first floor was all too surreal.

He lifted the hood on his sweatshirt and tightened his coat as he made way into the February chill with a stomach in knots and an apparent weight off his shoulders.

He was unsure how to feel, thus he wandered downtown New York City to get his mind in order. He walked for hours until his toes felt numb and his nose was frost bitten.

When he made it home, Sam stood up from the couch as soon as he came inside.

Sam already knew.

A text from Sharon telling him the wedding was off.

The box of stuff he had forgotten to take from Sharon’s now sitting on his own kitchen table where Riley had deposited it after Sharon called him to come and get it.

They were completely over.

Sam moved forward and clasped Steve’s shoulder, bringing his friend into a supportive hug until Steve shuddered with emotion and sunk to the floor.

*

Bucky’s first meeting with Tony about his prosthetic was the first week of February. By this point, most of his morning sickness had subsided and was instead replaced by a low thrum of 24/7 hunger for a snack.

He was 21 weeks pregnant and the swell of his abdomen couldn’t be mistaken for anything other than the small life growing inside of him.  

(And if he tried to pretend it was anything but, his son had begun kicking and nudging Bucky so frequently that the omega swore the tiny pup was doing martial arts inside him. His bladder seemed to be the biggest casualty in this new development.)

His hips ached, his acne came back with a vengeance, his heartburn was off the charts, and if he ate something he wasn’t supposed to, the gas was too embarrassing for him to show his face in public.

However, he did have to admit he had a certain glow about him. His hair felt soft and healthy, and his skin radiated with the pregnant pheromones rising off of him.

He noticed people were kinder towards him; offering their seats, opening the doors, and generally smiling towards him. For New York, this was nothing short of a miracle.

Tony Stark seemed impervious to looking at Bucky dopey eyed. He badgered the omega relentlessly until finally, _finally_ the pregnant omega gave in and wound up in the older man’s R &D shop, sitting on an exam table.

Tony was accompanied by Dr. Cho, a friend of Stark’s who also happened to be a world-renowned neurologist in mapping out nerve pathways from the brain to lost limbs.

“So I’m your guinea pig.” Bucky looked over the charts after Stark and Cho had explained their pitch; a new prosthetic for his left arm which would be able to function like a normal arm and allow him the widest ranges of movements available.

“Basically, but a very _advanced_ guinea pig. We’ve tested this on animals and on other human subjects, with positive results across the board.” Tony smiled brightly, “I figured we could try it on you as well.”

“How much is this going to cost me? This seems-“

“Like a million dollar investment? It is.” Dr. Cho added as she smiled, amused. “Tony has been vouching for you ever since we upgraded the technology, with the help of his team.”

“You’re the most deserving, James.” Tony smirked as he tapped his finger son the table, “I’m hoping that down the road, we can offer these prosthetics to more people in need.”

Bucky laughed, running his hand down his face, “And here I thought I was just getting a prosthetic to learn how to play guitar…not a whole new arm…”

Dr. Cho slid a thick folder across to the omega. “We obviously can’t operate until you’ve given birth and are healthy and cleared. It is not a severely invasive procedure, but we would need to be doing small incisions to attach the nodes to pick up the nerve signals to the brain. We want as little chance of complications as possible.”

“Understood.”

The omega seemed dumbstruck, looking over the files while Tony swiped through his tablet.

“On another night, have you and Steve boned yet?”

Bucky coughed, blushing. He glanced up to Dr. Cho, who purposely made herself seem like she was engrossed in her laptop as she typed up the appointment report.

“So?”

Bucky shook his head, “Definitely not. We’re uh…we’re not together.”

“Just a matter of time then.” Tony smiled mischievously as he paused and looked up to the veteran, “I can smell the slick on you. From one omega to another, don’t waste time second guessing yourself. Seize the day! Or, _alpha_ in this case.”

Dr. Cho snorted, trying to hide her smile.

Bucky scrunched his nose as he tried to take a deep inhale. He only smelled the slightest tinge of his slick, which had been making an annoying reappearance alongside his increased libido in the morning and evenings.

“Body naturally produces more slick to attract a mate. I’m sure our favorite blonde haired bombshell is putty around you.” The older omega couldn’t wipe the grin from his face.

As Bucky thought back on it, Steve had been like putty whenever he was in Bucky’s graces.

Overprotective, eager to attend to Bucky’s needs when helping him around the apartment and build the baby furniture for the nursery.

Bucky would’ve hated it if it hadn’t also been a little endearing.

He could get used to _Steve’s_ attention.

*

“I was horny all the time in my second trimester when I was pregnant with Jack.” Becca responded brightly as she sorted through a rack of boy’s t-shirts. “It’s completely natural to be horny 24/7.”

“It’s completely _embarrassing_.” Bucky hissed as he kept his voice low in order to not  scandalize the old lady a few feet away from them.

When he had informed Becca that Sharon and Steve had broken up, the brunette had screamed with joy for her brother and scooped him in her arms. Ever since the news broke, she had been pestering her brother to hurry up and ‘tap that’ and not waste time.

Talking about sex was nothing taboo in the Barnes family. With four kids, Winifred Barnes was adamant that her children have healthy relationships and comprehensive sex education. It was why Becca was glad to be so matter-of-fact with her brother on what to expect in terms of sex during pregnancy.

It didn’t make it any less embarrassing for Bucky, though.

“Just wait until your first pregnant heat hits. It’ll be a doozy.”

The older sibling grumbled, “I’ve been told. But what if Steve and I aren’t ready for that? What if he just pity fucks me? I don’t want him to feel obligated to have sex with me because I’m knocked up with his kid.”

The old lady glanced over to Bucky and winked at him.

The omega’s brows rose as she sauntered away.

“Did she just-?”

Becca was giggling, “If you think Steve would _ever_ pity fuck you, you are totally obtuse. He’s wanted to bone you since we were in high school. It’d be Christmas for him.”

The omega busied himself with some newborn onesies, blushing.

“Seriously though, it’s _okay_. Steve cares about you. Why _wouldn’t_ you want him to help you through a heat? Remember how dedicated he was to you when you were recovering?”

How could he not remember?

Steve had been with him through thick and thin.

It seemed only fitting that they were going to be parents every step of the way as well.

“Was the sex bad?”

“What?” he froze.

“The sex. When you conceived my precious little soon-to-be nephew, was the sex _bad_?”

He reddened from the tips of his ears to his toes. He knew they had ahd this conversation before, but it still made him twitchy to discuss it. “It was the best sex of my life.” He confessed openly. 

“And that was with both of you being inebriated. So imagine how good it’s going to be when you’re both sober and in the moment.” Becca grinned conspiratorially. "And those _hormones_ , gods, you're going to be all over each other. I bet Steve screws like a champ. He seems like a devoted lover."

Bucky tried to storm away, too embarrassed that slick had trickled down the cleft of his ass to continue the conversation. The flashbacks of just _how_ good Steve was clouded his mind, and he wasn’t about to be hot and bothered in a Target of all places.

Becca was quick and grabbed hold of her brother’s wrist, still laughing with an impish grin.

“The bond you have with Steve will be good for the baby. I know you guys kissed on New Year’s and I really hope you do more soon. You love each other, admit it.”

He deflated slightly when he saw the earnestness in her eyes. “Of course I love him.”

“Then what’s holding you back?”

“He just had a major break up, Becs. And besides, we both need time to adjust around each other.”  

“Screw that. I say jump his bones the next opportunity you get. Life is short and when your third trimester comes around, you’ll be too uncomfortable for the more adventurous stuff.”

“ _Adventurous stuff_?”

“I have a pregnancy Kama Sutra. I’ll let you borrow it.” Becca couldn’t look any more excited by the prospects of imparting such wisdom to her brother.

Bucky just wanted to find a geeky onesie while avoiding conversation on pregnancy sex, bladder problems, stretch marks, and _breast pumps_.

_*_

_22 weeks pregnant_

At five months pregnant, Bucky wasn’t unaccustomed to the feeling of ‘nesting’.

He had read about it plenty in books, and had seen the documentaries about pregnant persons developing an urge to transform their environments for the impending arrival of their infants. This instinct could begin anywhere from the second to the third trimester. The need was found especially strong in individuals who were separated from mates or who were unmated.  

The wide held belief was that before the arrival of a newborn, an omega would develop an urge to secure a strong, viable, and appropriate mate to ensure the safety and protection of offspring. Nesting and scenting urges were displayed the strongest by omegas. The practice was also seen in betas and alphas, but expecting omegas were found to have the strongest desire.

What he didn’t expect was for him to develop the strong urge early on in his pregnancy. Most omegas typically began nesting at the 7 month mark. 

It had started when Bucky was at Steve’s apartment a week ago.

_(Dr. Banner had warned him about this…)_

*

_Then_

In Bucky’s defense, Steve had left the pile of offending laundry right in front of him; ripe for the taking. The alpha was getting ready to throw a load of laundry into the washing machine when his cell phone began to ring. He groaned and set the hamper on the floor a mere 2 feet from Bucky’s feet.

“Crap, where is it!?” the alpha began patting down his pants frantically.

“In your room.” Sam supplied from his reading chair. The blonde let out an exasperated moan as he nearly tripped in his effort to get back to his bedroom.

“I don’t want to smell your foul socks, Rogers!” Sam berated as the blonde sheepishly exited. The darker haired alpha grumbled unhappily as he looked back down at his novel and tried to pick up where he left off while ignoring the sudden scents of smelly Steve in his nostrils.

Unbeknownst to Sam, Bucky had leaned forward to run his hands through the hamper that smelled so enticingly of his best friend. He snatched a dirtied grey workout shirt from the middle of the pile, sniffed it, and stuffed it under his sweatshirt. Seemingly unappeased, he continued to rifle through the hamper expertly until he pulled out a pair of red boxers and leaned low enough to put them to his face and take a deep breath of the musky scent.

Sam watched the whole thing unfold with wide eyes, too shocked to move and in fear that if he made one sound, the omega would retaliate. Whatever had taken over the other, Sam wasn’t about to question the motives of a 5 month pregnant omega.

Bucky seemed to then sense the other’s eyes and slowly turned to look at Sam. His eyes widened, face going red just as Steve came back into the room. The two merely stared at one another, the pair of them both wanting to deny this was happening.

“Oh- did some of my laundry fall out? Shit, I must’ve dropped the hamper too quick.” Steve wandered towards the hamper and pushed back in a few articles of clothing that Bucky had accidentally overlooked. “Ah man, those are filthy.” Steve’s face reddened too as he quickly snatched his boxers from Bucky, just to be met with resistance.

The omega’s hands were clutched tight to the underwear and all three became even more mortified by what was occurring.

Steve’s eyebrows shot up as he leveled his blue eyes to the omega’s. “Buck, I need to wash these.”

“I need them.” Bucky shot back quickly, nervously.

“I have clean ones.”

“These are fine.”

”Those are gross.” Steve reiterated by scrunching up his nose. “And used…”

“I’ll wash them.”

“Bucky-“

“Just give him the damn underpants, man.” Sam instructed wearily, watching the scene play it as if he were witnessing a nature documentary.

Bucky let go immediately, face burning red in shame as he looked down.

Steve’s face softened, though he was still perplexed by whatever it was that had come over the pregnant omega. He laid the boxers back into the hamper and sighed. “Do you really need them? It’s not a big deal…it’s just that these are- well, they have…” Steve coughed, uncomfortable, “…white stains…on ‘em.”

“TMI Steve!” Sam gagged.

“I think my brain is broken.” Bucky melted back into the couch and ran his hands over his face in horrified shame.

Steve pulled out an old hoodie he would often wear around the house on lazy days and presented it to the brunette. “How about this, instead? If it makes you feel better, please take it.”

Bucky did take it.

And kept the dirty gym shirt stuffed in his sweatshirt as well.

(And later on he might’ve sneaked a pair of ripe socks, too.)

*

_Now_

Nesting was a biological function that served to bring comfort in the form of familiar scents, which could be gathered in a single environment where the omega felt safe and at ease. Female betas and female alphas were known to nest, but omegas were the ones notorious for nesting as their olfactory bulbs were stronger and more linked to associating scent with contentment. It was nearly vital for them to give in to the instinct to settle their nerves and promote a healthier pregnancy. Bucky’s bed had transformed into a pile of blankets with a few articles of clothing stuffed under the sheets. At night, the omega was now surrounded by the scent of Steve as his pilfering habit had resulted in a few more articles of Steve’s clothing.

Some socks, a sweatshirt, and two shirts.

And some dirty gym shorts under the pillow.

Natasha merely raised a brow in amusement when she turned to her friend.

Bucky wanted to make an excuse and hide.

“I think it’s cute that you’re nesting already, but you should tell Steve so he doesn’t think his dryer is eating his clothing.”

“I’m a crazy person, Nat. I like the smell of his _dirty feet_.”

“You like the smell of _Steve_.” The redhead corrected, “It’s nothing to be ashamed of. There’s a whole chapter on it in your pregnancy book. Go read it while I revive your room. I promise I won’t wash your little… _stash_ here.”

Bucky watched as she took off the old bedsheets and began to replace them with the new, softer ones they had purchased. He chewed on his bottom lip while his right hand rubbed at his swollen stomach.

He cursed at his state.

With the impending 6th month, it also brought about a sore back, tired feet, aching nipples and pectorals, urgency to pee whenever his bladder was even ¼ full, and his amazing ability to doze into a nap anywhere.

Hoarding Steve’s clothing shouldn’t have been as embarrassing as many of his other symptoms, but it was the knowledge of what he did with the clothes that had him more on edge.

He slept with the clothing underneath the covers, beside him at night; covered by the alluring scent of Steve to keep him feeling warm and satisfied. Along with the pregnancy came the increase in slick and sexual arousal; all of which had Bucky more frustrated than not when he tried to use his sex toys only to find his orgasms wholly unsatisfying.

He worried over the thought of the pregnancy heat coming.

Clint and Natasha had discreetly purchased him a brand new knotting dildo designed specifically for pregnant male omegas. There were different sized heads and the brunette was ashamed to admit that he tried to fix it to the setting that was the most like Steve’s. Or at least, from what he could remember of their drunken tryst, as they had stumbled rather quickly into the main event without Bucky having properly given Steve a blowjob. (And how Bucky lamented he should’ve had that _perfect_ cock in his _mouth_ -)

Early on, the temptation to call upon Brock for his ‘services’ hung heavy on the back of his mind, but the alpha’s scent didn’t draw him  in nearly as Steve’s did. He had found one of Brock’s old shirts while cleaning and the smell of his ex-boyfriend made his nose itch unpleasantly. He wondered if it was his body thinking of Steve as his ‘alpha’, or if he was just pining for his best friend on a whole new awkward level.

Both options seemed equally horrific to entertain.

Steve wasn’t just some ‘knot’ to satisfy his needs. He truly loved the alpha and hoped the blonde felt the same.

Bucky continued to dust and clean around his room. With his pregnancy, Natasha had also insisted on buying all natural cleaners and getting rid of any chemicals or foods she deemed unfit for Bucky’s ‘delicate’ condition. His last doctor’s appointment had shown that his son was growing right on schedule and was lively and healthy.

This was also the same appointment (weeks ago) wherein Bucky learned he wasn’t having weird gas, but that it was actually the feeling of his son moving around. For a couple of weeks, the brunette had thought he was eating something funny to cause the weird sensations. Learning that it had been his son this whole time was enough to make him cry and laugh.

(And for Steve to exclaim, “ _I told you so_!”)

Bucky would never live it down, especially when Steve told the Barnes sisters.

*

When Steve comes over to the apartment late in the day, Bucky looks pleadingly towards Natasha to keep his nesting secret safe.

The redhead rolls her eyes and leads Steve into the living room where a chess game is set up waiting for them.

For now, Bucky will have peace of mind that his hoarding of clothing would be kept under lock and key.

The omega watched the two alphas set themselves up, but not before Steve leaned in to give Bucky a warm hug and an innocent kiss to the side of his head.

Ever since his official break-up with Sharon, Steve and Bucky began to impart on one another more symbols and acts of affection.

Soft touches, hugs, the holding of hands, chaste kisses.

Becca gagged and groaned that her brother was acting like some blushing high school virgin, but this was _Steve_ he was seeing and they were both enjoying the courting.

Because that’s what it was… _courting_.

Steve had sworn that he wanted to do things right, and that meant he would be adamant to court and woo the omega properly. The desire to rip off each other’s clothing and dive into the nearest bed was strong, but Bucky admitted to loving the touches and careful exploration of their new relationship.

It was a fresh, uncharted territory that Bucky was whole-heartedly excited to jump into. He still had his doubts and misgivings, but he trusted the alpha and they both didn’t want to screw up whatever _this_ was turning out to be.

It didn’t help though that every time the alpha was nearby, his body was ‘helpful’ in providing some slick to remind him how much he wanted the alpha in his bed and inside _him_.

He excused himself from watching the chess game in order to ‘nap’.

Or, as Natasha knew, drown himself in Steve’s dirty clothes while ‘ _taking care’_ of his ‘ _situation_ ’.

*

Steve accompanied the omega to the next doctor appointment, looking bright eyed and nervous as Dr. Banner greeted them both and began to check over the pregnant brunette. By this point it was routine; check heartbeat, gentle hands probing his stomach, the ultrasound machine registering the heartbeat, and finally a view of his son and how big he was, wiggling around on the screen.

“He looks quite active today.” Dr. Banner smiled brightly, pleased at what he was seeing.

“We had frozen yogurt beforehand.” Steve confessed with a soft smile, eyes focused in on the screen. He glanced over to Bucky from time to time, the two making eye contact as something unspoken registered between them.

“Well, I saw that you already registered with the hospital for the birth when your due date comes, and I will be available in that window.” Dr. Banner froze the machine and began wiping off the ultrasound wand, “I’m sending home a few brochures with you on some classes available for new parents. I think it’ll be beneficial for you, James, to learn some techniques to help you through labor and delivery.”

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Bucky agreed.

“I would also like to discuss with you two the pregnancy heat. You mentioned your slick has been increasing, and from my opinion, I would say within the next 14 days, you should experience the heat.” Dr. Banner sat back comfortably in his stool, eyes looking in-between the parents. “I’m honestly surprised that it hasn’t hit yet. It’s not late, but considering…your situation, it’s a little late. Which leads me to ask…”

The doctor turned specifically to Steve, “Have you been wearing scent suppressing deodorant?”

The blonde blushed, caught red-handed, “My mom told me it’d be good for my scent not to overpower Bucky in his...condition.”

Dr. Banner nodded, “Do you two intend to mate during the heat? If not, James, there are some alpha stud services I can recommend who are very professional and expressly work with omegas in need.”

“Do I have to have an alpha?” Bucky grimaced.

“Not necessarily, but given your medical history, I think it would be good for you.” Dr. Banner glanced down at his chart, “It is healthier for both mother and child, but if you would prefer not to have a partner to help you, I could prescribe some medications. However, the medications do come with some side effects-“

“I’ll do it.” The blonde blurted out.

Both of the brunettes turned to stare at the younger alpha.

“I’d be happy to help you through your heat.” Steve’s face was as bright as a tomato, but he pressed on. “Just let me know what I can do to help.”

Bucky couldn’t stop the sharp laugh that escaped him, “Of course you’d be _happy to_ -“

The doctor held up a hand. “That would be ideal, as you are the father, but the decision relies entirely on James and whether or not he wants to have a partner.” Dr. Banner interrupted. “James, the more you trust the partner you’re with, the more likely it will be that you’ll reap the benefits of the heat. If you choose Steve to assist you, I can send him home with some more information on what he’ll need to do.”

Bucky couldn’t stop laughing as he nodded his head, agreeing to allow this idea to pass.

It all sounded so ludicrous, but he knew this was coming. “So Steve will get a how-to guide on how to have sex with me?”

“ _Bucky_.” Steve chided.

Dr. Banner wasn’t put off by the pair. “It’s more of a guide on what will be most beneficial while taking care of a pregnant mate in heat. Now I know you’re not mated, but the guide still gives good information on care, nutrition, and techniques.”

“ _Techniques_.” The omega snorted.

The doctor couldn’t help but to smile, giving in to a small laugh himself. “I’ll send you home with the guides. James, if you do change your mind and would rather the medication or alpha services, please call me and let me know.”

The omega agreed and as they left (with their folder of guides and schedule of classes), the alpha couldn’t help but to ask, bashfully.

“So...was that a yes?”

Bucky glanced over to him, “To you boning me through my heat?”

Steve bit his lip when he made eye contact with the omega’s beautiful slate-blue gaze. His face still hadn’t lost his blush. “Yeah.”

Feeling brazened, the omega tugged on Steve’s scarf, bringing him down to his level. The alpha let out a sound of surprise as the brunette pushed his lips against the blonde’s, running his tongue hotly against the seam of the taller man’s lips.

The younger man let out the barest of moans, opening up for the omega as he kissed him _deep_. He had been craving this intimacy for weeks; _months_ even.

When he pulled away ( _too quickly, the alpha lamented_ ), Steve was nearly cross eyed with want.

“You better read up on those guides, Stevie.” The brunette winked.

Steve chuckled as he straightened and ran his hand through his hair. “Shit.”

Smug, the omega began to walk ahead of the other man, his heart hammering in his chest like a giddy teenager. Steve didn’t let him get too far as he gently grabbed his wrist.

He was surprised to see Steve’s face morph into one of set determination, “I’ll do it, but I have a favor to ask of you first.”

Taken aback, he inquired, “And what would that be, Rogers?”

The blonde brightened, like rays of sunshine through a stormy day. It nearly left the omega breathless as the alpha requested, “James Barnes, will you go out to dinner with me first?”

Gods help him, he said _yes_.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re almost nearing the end! ;__; Happier times are ahead for these two! (I’m just reaaallly excited to write some fluff!)  
> Hopefully this doesn’t seem rushed for a slow burn? It took them 6 chapters to get to this point. XD I REALLY wanted to post this for Bucky's 100th birthday, but I was late. Happy belated b-day, Buck! <3
> 
> This chapter was getting really long, so I cut off some parts to go into Chapter 7. Thank you for reading!  
> Next Chapter: puzzle pieces, ‘first dates’, heats, and (annoying) meddling family members.  
> [My tumblr](http://valkyriegail76.tumblr.com/)  
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/AmethystValkyri)  
> 


	7. Begin Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “This feels surreal.” The omega pointed out while he intertwined his fingers with his mate’s.  
> “Like I said, we can go slow.” Steve reassured.  
> “Do you want to go slower?” Bucky gazed up at him, challenging Steve to lie with a twinkle in his eye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No warnings! Just pure, unapologetic fluff and smut. ;}

 

_Then_

Bucky was sitting at the VFW, fiddling with his prosthetic nervously while avoiding the eyes of other veterans under the rim of his ball cap. To say he was nervous was an understatement, but his therapist had referred him to this site with optimistic hope that it would allow Bucky some common ground to begin socializing with others again. He would be in a setting where others could more easily relate with him, given their own tours of service and dealings with traumatic events. Sure, Bucky spoke with his family and close friends, but dealing with strangers had grown difficult over time.

Bucky had been hard pressed about attending group therapy when the subject was first brought up, but with enough gentle coaxing and reassurance, he finally agreed. He had been afraid of breaking down in front of others, or feeling that his trauma was not valid or as ‘severe’ as what others had experienced. It had taken months of therapy to begin healing the guilt he held for surviving and coming back to ‘civilian life’ all in all ‘put together.’

Little by little, he was mending, and today’s step would be a larger seam in that puzzle. He could barely sleep the night before, tossing and turning until he gave in to staring at the ceiling and the old glow-in-the-dark stars that held vigil over him every night.

He was nervous about opening up to complete strangers. Even though he knew that Sam Wilson was going to be his group moderator, he still felt the tell-tale signs of clammy hands and a rapid heartbeat. He knew, logically, that he didn’t have to speak the first few sessions. Sam had reassured him of it a few days prior when he met with the veteran one-on-one to explain the format of group sessions.

Still, Bucky’s mind was expert at conjuring high stress situations from seemingly ordinary life.

_What if I have a panic attack?_

_What if I get so nervous I vomit again?_

The brochure in his flesh hand had been wrinkled and folded to the point where the words were too furrowed to read.  

 “Seat taken?” A gruff voice inquired, drawing him from his thoughts.

The omega peaked from the edge of his baseball hat to see a taller man, scarred in the face and all down his arms, gesturing towards a chair a few inches away from his own. The man would’ve looked threatening to any civilian on the street, but Bucky was used to being around people who looked like they could crush you with their bare hands.

On closer inspection, the wounds the guy was donning looked like burn scars. He didn’t mean to stare, but the guy had already glanced to his prosthetic with a meaningful glint in his eyes. The man didn’t feel menacing, so Bucky averted his gaze back down to the pamphlet he had folded and unfolded too many times to count and shrugged.

The alpha took a seat and crossed his arms. The brunette observed him cautiously from the corner of his eyes how the darker haired alpha fidgeted in his seat until he found a comfortable spot with his head against the wall. It was a good brief distraction, watching the tight black shirt the man wore stretch over his bulging muscles. He eyed the corner white print labeled ‘NYPD’.

When the man settled, Bucky fell back into his own thoughts.

Going to a group counseling session was one of the first big steps he had decided to take towards his recovery. His family had been encouraging him to go at his own pace, sticking beside him for months while he learned to get back on his feet and navigate civilian life all over again with a body he had to re-associate himself with.

He was frustrated and upset more often than not, but things were slowly beginning to come back together. His network of friends and family made sure to see to that.

“You going to Wilson’s session?” the man beside him spoke up with interest. Bucky would’ve missed it all together if the man hadn’t inched slightly forward to glance over to him.

“Yeah.” He answered, voice rough with misuse.

“He’s really good. Army?”

“Yeah, army. Iraq.” Bucky replied, “Special forces.”

The man hummed beside him, “Marines. Afghanistan.”

Bucky’s eyes shifted towards the marine’s burn scars.

The bigger man snickered, “Yeah, that’s how I got these. Thanks to an IED explosion with a chunk of a house falling on top of me. Should’ve been dead, but I was too ornery to go.” He shrugged and turned to look at the other veteran with consideration. “Name’s Brock.”

The omega was surprised with the ease in which Brock spoke and the slight smirk at the corner of his lips. The seemingly carefree attitude made the stiffness in his shoulders lessen.

“James.” Bucky lifted up the remains of his arm, “Got this from overseas as well. Souvenirs, huh?”

The alpha smiled, amused.

Brock was a handsome guy; his scars, although angry and extensive, adding to him a rough and rugged exterior. He was good looking overall, and the realization that Bucky was checking someone out made him pause.

It had been forever since he had looked at someone this way.

Brock seemed entertained. “I think your session is starting.” He tilted his chin up, gesturing towards the now open door where Sam was greeting other members filing in.

Bucky cursed quietly and shuffled to get his messenger bag over his shoulder. Brock stood, assisting him.

“My session is with Berg today. Maybe I’ll see you around again sometime?” Brock trailed off.

“Yeah, that would be good.” Bucky responded, flustered.

“Take care, James.” Brock’s grin was slow, piercing almost with his single focus on the brunette.

The younger man was surprised to find himself blushing from the underhand flirting while he made his way towards Sam. He used to be good with charming the literal pants off of anyone, but after the accident, hadn’t connected with that side of himself in a long time. Despite it being out of the blue it felt….good. It felt normal to make small talk and look at a stranger and think they were attractive.

The omega couldn’t help but feel a little more at ease when he entered the group meeting. He still wasn’t ready to share or open up about his experiences, but little by little, the wounds were healing.

*

Bucky’s therapist recommended that he slowly ease into activities that he used to enjoy before the accident, as well as new hobbies to help promote self-esteem and an outlet for his anger and grief.

It was a good idea, albeit many of the activities Bucky had enjoyed required the use of two fully-functional limbs. Guitar, boxing, baseball, basketball…

The task became more of a ‘ _try it out’_ with the encouragement of his loved ones. He was frustrated more often than not when things didn’t go how he’d envision him, but he was coaxed again with the gentle reminder that things _were_ different and that he could either adapt, or remain where he was.

So Bucky, ever stubborn and eager to prove others wrong, began to go down a checklist of things he wanted to try with the approval of his therapist and Sam’s help.

He went to the gym and with the help of a personal trainer, slowly eased back into weightlifting to strengthen and nurture his body. The gym had been a place of solace for the omega, and just being around the familiar equipment began to soothe the warring in his mind. His trainer specialized in working with military veterans, and little by little, Bucky began to regain his confidence.

He tried soccer on Monday nights, swimming on Wednesdays, and his favorite, wrestling, on Fridays.

There were still plenty of hurdles to get over, but he looked forward to the activities and in time, it all began to fit like a puzzle. There were rough edges and sometimes the pieces didn’t fit so perfectly, but Bucky began to find purpose.

It was an extra bonus when Steve, Natasha, or Clint could join him or cheer him on in the sidelines. It was even better when the four of them could do activities together, such as ushering Bucky to the beach for a quiet day seaside, or to the park to go for a run and get hotdogs afterwards.

There were still sleepless nights.

There were still days Bucky had difficulty leaving the familiarity of his room.

And there were many times Bucky felt true guilt for being here; alive and functioning while many of his friends had been denied that future in the roadside attack.

Those days were the hardest.

When he only wanted to sit on the back porch or go out to the garden, he was granted his privacy to grieve, but always knowing his loved ones were nearby and ready to help. Some days, it annoyed the hell out of him and he lashed out, cursing and saying hurtful things to those who tried to pull him from his resentment.

Then there were other days, most days now, where he quietly accepted the hand held out to him.

*

The only hand Bucky wished he hadn’t taken a hold of was _Brock Rumlow’s_.

The pair met time and time again at the gym, at the VFW, and eventually, in wrestling. They were on a first name basis by the time Brock asked him out.

Looking back, Bucky should’ve realized that Brock was timing his visits to ensure he came across the omega and was able to talk to him or say hello. However, Bucky was taken with him, even though both Steve and Sam had told him something was off with the other alpha.

_Hindsight is 20/20._

*

*

_Now_

Seeing Brock for the first time since their argument in the park months prior was something the omega wasn’t _quite_ prepared for. He had filed away his hurt and frustrations over the break up in the far back of his mind, knowing he had played a generous hand in their split. They both deserved happiness and Bucky was hard-pressed to believe it was with each other. He knew he had made the right decision to cut ties with him. Especially now when things had been going so well with Steve.

It was after work when Steve had answered Bucky’s call to go out and satisfy a craving. Bucky was restless for Boba, and the alpha wasn’t one to deny the request.

Steve was looking over the wall menu, feet moving anxiously.

“You’re doing the potty dance.” Bucky snorted.

Steve huffed, “I didn’t get a chance to go before I left the apartment.” He tried to keep his voice low, slightly embarrassed.

“That excited for Boba, Stevie?”

“Excited to see _you_ , maybe.” He corrected. Bucky swatted him playfully and the alpha took the hint, handing over a $20 bill with a grin. “Get me the bubble tea, yeah? I’ll be right back.” He kissed the corner of Bucky’s cheek and moved out of line for the bathroom. The omega smiled to himself, still feeling giddy over the physical affection they had been growing more open with. It was still slow and tentative at times, but Bucky honored Steve’s wishes to wait until they went on to some _proper dates_ before they started having sex.

The omega teased him enough for it, but Steve’s intentions were good and the alpha _was_ still adjusting to their evolving relationship.

Bucky remained in line for a few moments, thumbing over the bill while he looked across the menu, trying to decide between Lychee or Taro when a familiar scent tickled his nose. The baby kicked hard, the omega sighing while he rested a hand low on his abdomen, wincing.

Then, a familiar smell wafted towards him and the sound of the bell on the front door jingled.

He knew that scent, that _presence_ anywhere. He glanced behind him to see Brock Rumlow in uniform coming forward, the man smiling cockily when he got in line behind him.

“Thought that was you.” Brock gestured towards the omega with a smirk. “I would know the back of you from anywhere.”

Bucky was annoyed to see the alpha, eyes narrowing while he looked him over. Brock still looked much the same. “Did you creep in here because you saw me through the window or do you honestly want Boba?”

The infant kicked again while Bucky breathed through grit teeth.

“Oh James, you know the peach is my favorite.” The older alpha replied. When there was a pause, he chuckled, glancing down towards the omega’s midsection, “I also might be slightly curious on how the bun in your oven is doing.”

There was no reference to plural, so it seemed Brock had heard the news about the loss of one of the twins.

“He’s doing fine, thanks.” Bucky replied, wanting to keep things relatively civil so that he wouldn’t make a scene in his favorite tea shop. If he did anything like punch the alpha, he could probably blame it on his pregnant hormones, but why take the chance?

When Bucky was at the front of the line, Brock tried to deter him, “No, hold up, lemme buy you a drink. Consider it my treat.”

“I don’t need your charity.” Bucky grumbled in irritation. The alpha was trying to appear charming, but it grated on his nerves.

“Aww, don’t be like that, James.” Rumlow was happy to brush past him and order for him, “I’ll get the peach Boba. And you…?”

“Lychee tea and a Bubble milk tea.” Bucky pocketed the money Steve had given him and crossed his arms. If Brock was so insistent, he could buy Steve a drink as well. It could be a low blow for the alpha’s bravado.

Brock didn’t question the order, paying and standing off to the side, his own arms crossed as they waited. Brock’s scent and presence left Bucky on edge, the hairs on the back of his neck rising.

They didn’t have much to discuss.

Brock cleared his throat, “C’mon Barnes, this city is big; we were bound to bump into each other at our favorite Boba shop at some point.”

“ _My_ favorite Boba shop.” Bucky corrected.

The older man shrugged while he looked over towards the omega. “I see you’ve got no mating mark.” Brock tapped at his neck.

“Of course not, why would I?” Bucky scowled. Inquiring about mating marks was a taboo subject unless it was from close loved ones. Brock didn’t have the right to know Bucky’s current status.

“Don’t play coy, doll. I’m asking why Steve hasn’t mated you yet. I thought that would’ve been the first thing you’d do. Get properly mated to your golden boy.” The alpha admitted nonchalantly.

“We’re not mated…” The omega was slightly embarrassed as he shifted, glancing back towards the hall where the bathroom was. Their drinks came up and the two grabbed them, shifting awkwardly.

“He’s not going to marry whatsherface, right?”

Bucky’s lips thinned while he shook his head no.

The alpha snorted, “No shit.” He gave the shorter brunette an appraising look, “Heard the rumors, but wasn’t sure if they were true. So then, what’s the hold up?”

It was in that moment that Steve reappeared, his face set and hardened in a signature Rogers scowl when he spotted Brock. The younger alpha looked threatening when his blue eyes narrowed and broad shoulders tensed while he approached. Brock watched him carefully, entertained by the display. The old, more weathered alpha seemed unaffected by the taller alpha’s displeasure.

“You okay?” The blonde whispered to his partner, setting a protective hand low on the omega’s back when he reached him.

Rumlow watched the exchange intently, eyes dark and predatory.

“I’m fine. Brock was kind enough to buy our drinks for us.” Bucky’s voice was strained, holding back his annoyance when he spoke. He wiggled Steve’s money back into his pocket.

Steve met the older alpha’s eyes, staring him down.

Bucky cleared his voice, “Thanks for the drink.” He could only handle so much alpha posturing and pheromones before his irritation reached full capacity. He pulled at Steve’s hand and glanced towards Brock, “We’ll be going now.”

“Take care of yourself, James. Haven’t seen you down at the VFW in a while.” Brock replied, “The crew has been wondering if you’ve traded in group sessions for Lamaze.”

The omega stiffened. “I have other priorities.”

Brock took a sip of his Boba, smirking. “I’m sure you do. Have fun _playing house_.”

Bucky could feel the tension vibrating off his skin from where their hands were joined. The blonde wanted nothing more than to turn around and punch Brock for merely _existing_ , but the brunette put his energy in redirecting his partner towards the door and out to the streets.

For two blocks, Steve kept glancing behind them, paranoid and frustrated.

“Why does he always _look_ at you like that, like your some piece of meat?” Steve groused, “That guy _smiles_ and I want to punch him in the face. He’s a manipulative asshole.”

“You two don’t exactly have a glowing history.” Bucky frowned. “He wasn’t being overly obnoxious. Besides, he was in uniform. Do you really want to get in trouble with the law over that?”

The younger man shook his head, “It’d be worth it to wipe that smirk off his face.”

The stressed out scents emanating from Steve were enough to give Bucky reason to pull the alpha to the side of the walkway. He kissed the corner of Steve’s cheek, “Hey, come off it. He’s not worth it. The guy is an alcoholic and fighting his own demons.”

“I hate it when you tell me to brush it off. He treated you terribly, Buck.” Steve frowned when he thought back to the engagement party when Brock had laid his hands on the omega. “There’s no excuse.”

“Yeah, but I’m asking you to let it go.” Bucky reiterated. He set his Boba down to the ground so that he could cup the side of Steve’s face gently, “We’ll probably run into him again, but I need you to be cool, okay? He gets off on feeling powerful and making you upset.”

“I know, but I just- I hate the guy.” Steve wasn’t 100% on board with Bucky’s statement, but it was clear that he was trying to make peace with it. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you.”

“Pffft, _nah_. I was a little on edge, too, so my scent probably didn’t help.” Bucky shrugged it off. “How about we head over to your place instead?  Maybe you could show me your upcoming projects?”

“Sure, probably a better idea in case he’s following us.” The artist sighed, feeling more at ease with the proposal. He knew, logically, that Brock wouldn’t be following them, but the instinct to ‘protect’ was too great to ignore. He was scenting the air more than usual, trying to catch wind of the opposing alpha. “Might take a shower to get his scent off of me. Maybe you can join me?”

Bucky raised a brow, “Us, naked in a shower? You sure you can keep your hands to yourself?”

Steve snickered, “I wouldn’t mind scent marking you, if that was okay.”

“Not til our date.” Bucky nudged him. Scent marking could be a very intimate affair, and there was no ensuring that it would stay strictly PG once they got their hands on each other. Sure, they had been kissing and making small touches, but nothing past first base.

Bucky paused, eyes gleaming, “So, where is our date, anyways?”

“I’m picking you up at 7 on Friday, remember?” The talk of their upcoming outing brought Steve to smile more genuinely, nerves settling. “I’m not telling you where we’re going; I want it to be a surprise.”

“You realize that makes me even more curious, right?”

“You’ll enjoy it, I promise.”

 “Not even Clint or Natasha are telling me.”

“Good, because they’re sworn to secrecy.” Steve’s brows raised, “So don’t be snoopy, dress casual, and be ready by 7.”

“I like it when you’re bossy.” The omega purred, reaching up to steal an innocent kiss. The desire to do more with Steve, to slip his tongue in and lose track of time was overwhelming, but it was fun to tease his alpha.

_His alpha._

“Walk me to your place?”

Brock seemingly forgotten, Steve agreed. “Just so long as you behave yourself.”

“I’m always well-behaved.”

“Liar.” Steve snorted, entertained.

Bucky took a sip from his Boba and leaned in close to the slightly taller alpha, allowing the blonde to drape an arm around his shoulder.

*

Bucky wasn’t sure who was more excited for his date with Steve; him, Steve, his friends, or his family. Somehow ( _Becca_ , probably) the word got out that the pair were finally going on a date and were attempting to ‘go steady.’ It was exciting news for most of the parties involved, and a no surprise situation for the Barnes and Rogers families.

Bucky woke up excited for the day, pushing himself to get ready for work with a slight hop to his step. His stomach cramped with nerves but he ignored the butterflies in favor of imaging where his best guy was going to take him.

When 5 o’clock rolled around, he couldn’t have been out of the office building faster.

Natasha helped her roommate style his hair and add a few touchups to his ensemble while the omega waited impatiently for his ‘date.’ Clint was experimenting with small touches of makeup to enhance the omega’s features.

“You’re lucky you already have that pregnancy glow. The highlighter will only increase it.” He pressed more of the shimmer to Bucky’s cheekbones expertly. “Do you have any idea where Steve is taking you?”

“None.” Bucky sighed. He tried to ignore the slight itch on his jaw and chin where he was freshly shaven, “He won’t even give me any _hints_ , the jerk.”

“It’s a good first date.” Natasha looked pleased when she took a step back. “I know you’re anxious about the date, but what about _after_ the date?”

Bucky licked his lips. “It would be nice to get laid.” He confessed outright, unembarrassed by his forwardness, “Steve’s scent drives me wild, but I know he wants to go slow.”

“Nat and I boned on the first date.” Clint chimed in. “And we turned out just fine. Besides, you guys are doing things backwards. You’re already pregnant; what’s the worst thing that could happen?”

Natasha rolled her eyes, “Neither of us had just gotten out of a serious engagement when we got together.”

Clint overlooked his mate’s remark, leveling his eyes with the omega, “You’re nearly six months pregnant and the two of you have been skirting around each other for weeks. Nothing is stopping you both from being together and you have all of our blessings, so _go for it_. The sexual tension you two have been radiating has been slightly nauseating.”

The redheaded chided Clint with a light smack to the back of his head. “Don’t be crass.” Clint chuckled impishly.

“You are seriously cheering me on to get laid?” Bucky pointed out with a snort, “I’m not opposed, but it should be Steve you have this prep talk with. Trust me; I’m willing to go to home base with him if he’s ready.”

There was knocking at the door.

“I’ll text Steve some encouragements.” Clint winked.

“You’ll do no such thing.” Bucky bumped his shoulder with Clint’s as he got up from his seat. He was still relatively spry, despite his rapidly growing abdomen. He had to thank the gym for keeping him mostly limber while his body readjusted to the weight distribution. There were many times he was clumsy or struggled with balance, but keeping up on his physical strength did wonders.

He straightened his shirt, only having a few seconds of mild panic when he thought about his date. He worried for the sake of worrying, biting his bottom lip while his heart thundered in his chest with every step towards the door.

However, when he opened the door, the nervousness dissipated like vapor in the sun. Steve stood in front of him, smiling wide with a bouquet of brightly colored, cheerful tulips in his hand. He looked handsome in a pair of dark wash jeans and a light blue shirt, his hair combed back.

“Bucky Barnes…are you ready to have your world rocked?” Steve waggled his eyebrows.

 Bucky couldn’t stop the laugh that erupted from his lungs. He leaned against the doorway, wiping tears from his eyes

The alpha cleared his throat nervously. “…is that a no?”

“You brought me flowers?” Bucky questioned, eyes alight with joy and humor while he looked over the fresh bouquet.

“Well, this _is_ our first ‘official’ date, right?”

“Yeah…” Bucky thumbed over the different colors of tulips. He smiled brightly, more than pleased and excited that of all things, Steve had brought him _flowers_. The last time someone had bought him flowers was….well, a long time.  “I just wasn’t expecting you to go so traditional on me.”

“What kind of a date would I be if I didn’t bring you a gift?”

The gesture was so kind, so pure, and so _Steve_ that Bucky couldn’t hold back.

The omega leaned across the threshold to give the blonde a warm kiss on the lips. “Thank you.” He didn’t pull away; content to cradle the flowers in his arm while he deepened the kiss, welcoming the soft brushes of Steve’s tongue against the seam of his lips, the pair smiling into the affectionate display.

Bucky would never grow tired of kissing the younger alpha.

The date could’ve very well ended there, with Bucky pulling Steve inside his apartment, and to his bedroom to give into their hormones. However, Natasha cleared her voice from behind them, smirking with a brow raised while Clint covered his grin.

“How about I get those flowers in a vase so that you two lovebirds can start your date?” She offered.

The couple pulled away with pink in their cheeks.

“Yeah, probably a good idea.” Bucky surrendered the flowers to the redhead, smiling unashamedly. Steve bit his lip, savoring the taste of the omega on his lips while his thumb brushed the moisture off just underneath.

Bucky gently placed the flowers in Natasha’s arms. The female alpha smirked, “You two have fun.”

Clint appeared at the doorway, grinning, “Nat and I will be out late tonight, so the apartment is yours until 3am.” He winked.

“Good to know.” Bucky knew _exactly_ what Clint was implying, and felt little to no shame over the prospect of alone time with his date. Why should he? Steve and him were finally free to date one another, and Bucky wasn’t opposed to doing more with the alpha.

“See you later.” Steve waved. His left hand laced with Bucky’s right.

“Have fun you two.” Natasha’s eyes softened. Watching Steve and Bucky together as an (unofficial) official couple felt right. After so many years of seeing the trust and fondness between them, it was satisfying on a deep level to see two of her closest friends coming together to explore their feelings for one another. The added bonus was the excitement to see them become parents as Bucky’s due date crept closer. 

Clint put an arm around his mate and kissed the side of her head.

*

After a cab ride and a guessing game that made Steve more tightlipped than ever, a mischievous gleam in his eyes, they arrived at their destination in the city.

Bucky’s eyes brightened.

“Katz’s Delicatessen!?” A broad grin bloomed across Bucky’s handsome face. “I haven’t been here in ages!”

“You’ve been a sandwich fiend lately so I thought…” Steve gestured his hand towards the sign.

“You chose wisely, Rogers.” Bucky felt more relaxed when they exited the cab and went inside of the establishment, getting a spot in line to look over the long menu. Bucky already knew what he wanted, giddy with excitement while Steve rested a hand over his lower back, keeping him comfortably close and content. The warmth that Bucky had been assaulted with early in the morning rushed back, but he ignored it.

Bucky ended up ordering hot pastrami while Steve ordered a corned beef sandwich. They took a seat across from each other, digging into their monstrous sandwiches with glee.

Almost halfway through Steve paused, grinning, “You know, I could pretend to have a Harry met Sally moment over here.”

The omega nudged him from underneath the table with his foot, “You do that and I might have to one up you. Unless you want to save it for later?” He licked his lips purposely.

“This is our first date, Buck.” Steve chided jokingly. “Don’t want to assume you’re that type of guy.”

“Definitely not.” Bucky put emphasis into running his hand over the top of his pregnant stomach, laughing. He tried to keep a straight face, but it was difficult when Steve was giggling across from him.

It reminded Bucky of when they were teenagers; sneaking away to late night diners or strolls in the park while they discussed their hopes and dreams for the future. The omega wished that he had recognized his feelings for the blonde all those years ago. He wondered if it would’ve saved them time, if things could’ve been different with an early confession. He thought about his deployment, Sharon, and all of the things they had gone through together…would they have happened or been made easier if they were together right out of high school?

The again, Bucky wouldn’t be here now, pregnant and sitting across from the man he was about to have a family with.

_The man he was hoping to spend his life with._

“Penny for your thoughts?” Steve grazed Bucky’s ankle with his foot.

“It might not be first date material.” The brunette stated with a shrug.

“Well, there’s nothing really conventional about our situation, so spill.” Steve took another bite from his sandwich.

“I’m just thinking about you and me. I wonder if things could’ve been different if we- if I had _known_ my feelings for you early on and told you.”

The blonde considered the confession, wiping juice from the corner of his lips. “Sure, it might’ve, but we’re here now. You and me. I can’t think too much in the past because sure, there are many things I would like to change, but we’ve made it this far. I’m excited to keep going. ”

The corners of Bucky’s lips quirked into a smile, “What’s our game plan now?”

“Well…” Steve set down his sandwich, wiping his fingers onto the napkin. “I’m hoping I can woo you properly now that we’re together.”

“Woo me?’ Like some bar maiden romance option in a fantasy RPG?” the older omega snorted. 

The alpha smiled, “No, like classic wooing. We have a lot to think about, a lot to sort out before our son is born and I would love to enjoy the time we have alone together, before our schedules grow hectic.” Steve explained, “I know that none of this is by the book, but I’m here if you’ll have me, any way you want.”

“So can I call you my boyfriend?” Bucky ventured, trying to place a word for what they were to each other. Boyfriends could be a strong first choice, but the word didn’t sit right, didn’t hold the same meaning and weight that his heart felt.

Steve seemed to feel the same way. “Boyfriend sounds a little high school though, doesn’t it? What about partner or mate?”

“Mate.”

Their eyes met.

To refer to another as a ‘mate’ came with an understanding of a long-term commitment, especially designated for married couples or those who had physically mated with a mark on their neck. Bucky wondered if it was too soon to say the word out loud, but Steve’s hand reached for his across the small table, reassuring and heavy against his skin.

Steve had rarely called Sharon his mate, nor had Bucky called Brock the same endearment. It was a word that held solid meaning that never quite fit into those past relationships.

It was a word that felt unashamedly right between them now and everything they had been through together.

“Mate it is, then.” Steve squeezed Bucky’s hand. “Is that too much to say yet?”

“We’ve waited long enough to say it.” Bucky spoke up.

“I know, but if you need for us to slow down at any point, we can. I’m enjoying this between us, and I don’t want you to feel pressured to jump into things. I’m here with you for the long haul, I promise.”

The brunette’s voice lowered slightly as he became aware of their surroundings and the nature of their conversation, “Are you implying a mating mark?”

A blush rose on the alpha’s cheeks. He cleared his throat, “I know I would be proud to wear your mark on my neck, given you were ready.”

“Are you?”

Steve looked up to him, shy and exposed. “I’m…not sure if I’m entirely ready _yet_ , especially here in this deli, but soon.”

Bucky’s face softened. Of course, they were still out in public. Steve may have been strong-willed and dedicated, but a serious discussion such as mating/bonding was best left in the privacy of their homes.

Steve wanted to mate with him, and that was something Bucky’s heart could beat faster for every time he thought about it.

“This feels surreal.” The omega pointed out while he intertwined his fingers with his mate’s.

“Like I said, we can go slow.” Steve reassured.

“Do you want to go slower?” Bucky gazed up at him, challenging Steve to lie with a twinkle in his eye.

The blonde caught on. “Honestly? I can’t stop thinking about you and it’s driving me kind of wild. I’m willing to go at whatever pace you set, but it’s been a long time and I feel ready for more with you. You know I’ll be honest if things go too fast.”

“That’s all I ask.”

Steve leaned across the small table, Bucky maneuvering slightly to meet him a quarter of the way when they kissed.

It felt easy and natural to be drawn to one another this way, even when they pulled apart, Steve smiling. “You taste like pastrami, Buck.”

“You tasted nice and meaty too, punk.” The brunette thumbed at his lips, feeling warm.

After eating the two enormous sandwiches, they remarkably still had room for cheesecake.

 *

At the end of dinner, they walked around downtown New York for a while, stopping into a few pop-up galleries that caught their interest. Normally, Bucky would’ve directed Steve towards a bar, but he wanted to keep the blonde to himself while they strolled together easily. The loud bar could be saved for another time; with friends, pool, and darts to play while the omega sipped on a 7up.

They ended up in Central Park; taking a seat on one of the benches so that Bucky could get an impromptu lower back rub while he nestled up to Steve’s side, content with a bag of popcorn from a vendor.

Bucky thought back on Natasha’s words and agreed, _the date was perfect_.

Just the two of them and all of New York.

He enjoyed leaning against Steve while they reminisced easily about things they had done in their youth, while wondering what sort of trouble their own son would get into. He felt settled and more hopeful of his future as a parent, especially knowing Steve would be there every step of the way.

The Rogers and Barnes families would continue to have joint holiday celebrations and birthday traditions, made all the more meaningful with a child in the mix.

They also finally agreed to have a joint last name for their son: Rogers-Barnes. Of course, the topic of a first name was still debatable and Steve lamented that they needed to go through a baby name book to find something appropriate.

 When it was getting late and the air grew cold, Steve walked Bucky back to the omega’s apartment, the pair growing more quiet and shy when they approached the door.

“I would invite you in, but I don’t want you to get a bad impression of me. I’m not that kind of guy.” Bucky fluttered his eyelashes, pouting his lips in a humorous display while he rubbed his pregnant belly.

Steve let out a laugh, snorting loud enough to give Bucky a fit of giggles while he leaned back against the doorframe.

“I mean, I know we’re doin things backwards here, but…I’ve got high morals, Steven Rogers.”

He ran his hand over his rounded stomach for emphasis.

Steve wiped tears from his eyes.

“Can I please kiss you?”

Bucky brightened, “I thought you’d never ask. I was hoping you weren’t holding out on me, Rogers.”

The alpha closed the space between them without hesitation, crowding Bucky against the door. They looked to each other for a moment, Steve unable to wipe the smile from his face when their lips met, hot and needy. Bucky wrapped his arms around the taller blonde, encouraging him to get as close as possible, despite his stomach pressing into Steve’s. He slipped his tongue against the seam of the artist’s lips, toying with the blonde’s bottom lip until he opened readily for him.

They were allowed to be greedy with each other’s affections after so long of being kept in the dark. One of Steve’s hands cradled the back of Bucky’s hair, fingers reveling in the feel of soft tresses. The other hand brushed down to the omega’s waist, keeping him steady while they deepened the kiss. Bucky was melting into a hot mess, the sensation of warm slick trickling from his hole making him gasp.

Steve’s scent smelled like heaven on earth, and the pregnant omega couldn’t get enough of it.

Emboldened by the brunette’s encouragements and smooth gliding of his tongue against Steve’s, the blonde moved his hand from the omega’s waist to his ass, cupping a handful of the strong, rounded muscle.

Bucky moaned into the kiss, opening his legs more to allow Steve to slide a leg in-between, perfectly solid for the older omega to grind against and find some relief. In the back of his head, he knew this might be going fast, but they had waited _so long_ to get to this point and it was all his lust-addled mind could focus on.

Steve was finally against him, ushering him into pleasure while they moved with one another.

The slamming of a door jarred them both from their fog.

One of the neighbors cleared their throats, locking their door before walking down the opposite end of the hall towards the elevators.

The brunette didn’t want it to end there. “Would you like to come inside?”

Steve’s lips were full and glistening with their mixed saliva. The omega couldn’t look away, mesmerized when the alpha spoke, “I thought you weren’t that type of guy.”

“I lied.”

They pressed their foreheads together, both of them catching their breath and gathering their thoughts. It was hard to think clearly when they were both high in the clouds with lust. Their pheromones did nothing to help, both of them drawn together tightly.

“If you invite me in, what do you want to do, exactly?” Steve breathed, voice slightly wrecked.

Bucky kissed Steve chastely to ground him back into reality. “I want you to come to my room and finish what we’ve started here.”

The alpha’s breath hitched, “Are you positive?”

“Steve, I’ve been waiting for you for _years_. There’s no one else I’d rather share my bed with. Is that going too fast?”

“No, _god, Buck._. I-I want you, too. More than anything or anyone.” It was the first time Steve confessed his heart so frankly in front of Bucky, eyes earnest and focused on him.

Bucky was barely able to keep his footing when he turned around, fishing his keys from his pocket to open the door. Steve kissed along the back of his neck, nibbling the skin along his bonding gland enticingly and distracting the omega.

Eventually the door gave way. Bucky had half a mind to just drag Steve straight to the bedroom, but he knew he needed to situate the door properly before anything could progress. Steve pulled away, allowing Bucky a moments reprieve.

Another gush of slick trickled down Buck’s ass and he groaned, shifting where he stood. His boxers would be soaked at this rate, which led him to another thought.

The warm feeling in his stomach, the increase in slick…

“Do you mind if I use the restroom before we keep going?” He asked, feeling too warm and turned on.

Steve shook his head, “By all means, do what you need to. I’ll get us some bottled waters.”

“Thanks.” Bucky hurried to the bathroom, closing the door behind him. His reflection in the mirror told him as much with his suspicions; the high blush all over his face and neck, the low cramps in his back. He had been feeling heated all over, something he hadn’t felt since back in September when he and Steve were in this similar situation.

_I’m going into heat soon._

He wasn’t surprised. Dr. Banner had been warning him that his pregnancy heat was imminent, especially when a virile unmated alpha was hanging around. His close proximity with Steve was slowly edging his body into a heat, trying to cement a mating to help with his condition.

It was no wonder they’d been so affectionate with each other over dinner.

_No wonder Steve’s hand had pressed against him so protectively._

Bucky was giving off light heat pheromones that he knew would only grow stronger the more he was around Steve.

He washed up hastily.

The blonde alpha was sitting on the living room couch, thumbing through his phone while sipping at his water. He immediately looked up to the omega when Bucky entered the room, lingering at the end of the hallway.

“Everything okay?” Steve asked when he noticed the other’s guarded pose.

“I think my heat is starting soon.” Bucky explained, somewhat disbelieving. “I haven’t been this close to you in a while and I think it’s triggering my hormones.”

Steve straightened up, concerned. “Do we need to call Dr. Banner?”

“No! No, we’re good.” Bucky placated while taking a few steps towards the blonde. “We might need to get some supplies, though.”

“Are you sure it’s your heat? You look really flushed.” Steve ran a hand across Bucky’s warm cheek. “Are you feeling sick? Maybe you have the meat sweats from dinner?”

“Do you want to feel the amount of slick I’m producing? It _has_ to be a heat your scent triggered.”

Steve reddened. “Okay. Uh, yeah, I can definitely run to the store really quick and grab us some supplies, then.”

Bucky glanced down to Steve’s obvious erection outlined in his jeans.

“Might take a few seconds to cool off in the hall, but I can go, I’m good!” Steve reassured.

The omega remained unconvinced. “ _Or_ we can ask Nat and Clint?” Bucky waved his own phone. “I know we weren’t expecting this, but I’m not going to send you out when you might go into a rut. Let me just call them really quick. Maybe you can grab some extra blankets and towels from the hallway closet?”

Steve set out to do just that, giving Bucky a moment to pause and internally laugh at their current situation.

Of course the first chance his body gets to bone Steve, and he begins to go into a heat. He couldn’t blame his pregnant hormones for turning the tables, but he needed to make sure things were in order before he got lost in _Steve_ for the next few days.

 He called Natasha first, feeling only slightly embarrassed.

“James?” She answered after the second ring.

“Hey Nat, guess what, I’m going into heat!” Bucky leaned back against the kitchen counter, watching the blonde move into his room with enough blankets and towels to make a fort.

“You were that excited, huh?” She replied in amusement. “Steve rile you up too much? You _have_ had quite the dry spell.”

“Har har.” Bucky exhaled, “I can’t run out and Steve’s in no condition to go to the store, so we were wondering if we could bribe you and Clint to run by the store real quick and grab us some supplies. I’ll pay you back _and_ buy you both dinner.”

“We’re out with some of the crew, but we can sneak away for a little bit. Text me what you need and we’ll make the trip.”

“Thank you, Nat. You’re both a lifesaver.”

“Mmm. Just try not to have sex on the couch. That’s a communal space, remember?”

Bucky huffed, “We’ll behave.”

“I hope so, I made a bet with Clint and Sam that I’d _really_ hate to lose.”

“Affirmative.” The omega glanced over to the couch and imagined how easy it would be to straddle Steve there and ride him.

_Not helpful, brain._

Bucky blinked, “Wait, _a bet_?”

Natasha chuckled. “We’ll be there in half an hour or so, depending on traffic.”

“Thanks, Nat.”

“Remember: Keep it in your pants or your bedroom til we get there, capisce?”

Bucky agreed and hung up, groaning from the feel of his hot and prickly skin. He had been expecting his heat to come, but hadn’t been prepared for it to arrive _tonight_ of all nights.

He grabbed an icepack from the freezer and pressed it against the back of his neck, the icy cold offering some relief. He texted Natasha a list of a few things he would need; protein bars, prenatal ensure, more water, some scent diffusers, soothing lotions, and a few other essentials to get through the upcoming heat and possible rut Steve could experience.

“Hey Buck, what is this?”

The brunette glanced up and froze at the sight of Steve’s pilfered clothing in the alpha’s hands. The younger man looked slightly entertained by the items he found, especially the dirty underwear he held up teasingly.

“Does this have to do with that _incident_ a while ago?” He questioned carefully, trying not to humiliate his mate even though he himself was embarrassed to be holding up his own dirtied underwear.

Bucky wanted to sink through the floor and disappear.

In his eager lust-filled daze, he had completely forgotten about the ‘stash’ underneath his pillows and blankets.

“It helps me sleep at night.” The brunette clarified quickly, “It’s your scent. Trust me, I don’t- I’m not into sniffing underwear, but-“

“You’re nesting, aren’t you?” Steve finished for him, eyes soft. “I read about it in the omega pregnancy book.”

“Yeah…”

“It’s okay…it makes sense, actually, seeing how I’ve been having clothes missing. I thought the dryer was eating them or Sam was accidentally mixing my stuff in with his. But, I guess that hasn’t been the case…”

“So me stealing your dirty clothes doesn’t weird you out?”

Steve smirked, “I mean, it’s a _little_ strange, but you’re pregnant, so you get a free pass. It’s not as weird as the frozen pickles.”

The artist approached his mate, smiling wistfully, “Do you want to go lie down and watch a movie until they get here?” When the omega thought about it, he knew there were more _interesting_ things he’d rather partake in. Bucky glanced down, noticing that Steve was still relatively hard in his pants. He could smell the arousal coming off of the alpha, stirring and buzzing underneath his skin like an addiction. It warmed his cheeks, made his stomach clench with slow-churning desire.

“Did you set up my room?”

“Yeah, I set out the towels and some fresh blankets.” Steve paused, eyes darkening minutely when Bucky licked his lips. “Do you want to move in there instead?”

Bucky reached for his taller mate, “We have an hour. Plenty of time to finish what we started.”

“I don’t know, I have quite a few ideas for what we could do…” Steve whispered against the omega’s lips, surrendering to the brunette’s advances with welcome vigor.

They were pulled back towards one another, gravitated by the scent and feel of their skin finally touching, their lips pressing hot and unabashed against one another. Steve walked them carefully back towards Bucky’s room, having to feel his way as the omega wouldn’t relent with his affections.

Not that Steve was objecting.

They both made it into Bucky’s room where light filtered in from the window and the desk lamp in the corner. The omega had a flash of Deja vu, remembering a similar situation months ago. He could recall the dim light reflecting off of Steve’s sweaty skin, their drunken limbs entangling in the sheets. Steve seemed to be thinking along the same lines if his amused chuckle was anything to go by.

“I’m glad we’re both in our right minds finally.” Steve whispered, lips running along the side of Bucky’s neck to pepper him with hot kisses that made the omega’s cock pulse. “Can I touch you?”

“ _Yes_.” Bucky hissed when Steve bit lightly at his earlobe, making his toes curl in pleasure.

“Let me know what you like.” The alpha stated, repositioning them with Bucky’s help. The brunette scooted back against the pillows, lying down with Steve above him, the artist conscious of his mate’s pregnant stomach. Bucky was slightly propped up, alleviating some of the pressure on his back.

Despite having hooked up months ago, they were both nervous while they began to undress and explore the new boundary they were crossing. Steve shed his shirt first, muscles jumping under Bucky’s hand when the brunette traced his fingers over the alpha’s abs appreciatively. He could never get over how sculpted and perfect Steve was. The way the alpha looked back indicated Steve felt the same about Bucky’s figure.

Despite his pregnancy, Bucky was still well built and fit, having continued his regiment at the gym with some modifications for his condition. Steve groaned as he ran his hand over the omega’s pecs, loving the feel of the omega’s firm muscles beneath his palms. The brunette wasn’t slight by any means, his thick thighs framing the outside of Steve’s hips while he encouraged more contact, more exploration of their bodies.

Steve was steadfast in his mission to relieve Bucky’s ache and provide him with what he wanted. His lips trailed down the omega’s strong collarbone, licking stripes of sweat from his skin until he reached the omega’s right nipple.

There were faded scars scattered across Bucky’s chest and concentrated at his left side where the blast had impacted him the worst. Stave kissed over ever rise of skin, mapping the outline with his tongue while Bucky sighed above him, panting when one hand began to knead and rub at his right nipple. The omega had never been particularly sensitive with his nipples, but his increase of hormones had made his body more responsive and tender to touch. His nipples had especially felt the change, and every brush against them caused jolts of pleasure straight to his cock.

“Yea, like that-“ Bucky encouraged with breathy sighs, eyes rolling to the back of his head when Steve pressed his mouth against the brunette’s nipple, rolling his tongue against the pert nub in his mouth. Bucky’s right hand pressed against the blonde’s short hair, keeping him steady with desperate strokes.

The younger alpha worked over Bucky’s nipples, adjusting himself carefully towards Bucky’s other side to shower attention on the omega’s left nipple, sucking and lightly nibbling on the bud. The brunette’s moans were growing louder the more frantic, hips undulating under Steve for some kind of relief.

Steve provided him with some mercy, putting a leg between Bucky’s thighs for him to grind on while he played with his mate’s lovely tits, sucking and biting until Bucky was gasping urgently for more.

“Please- _oh fuck_ \- I don’t want to cum in my pants, Steve-“

The alpha grinned, pleased with his handiwork when he moved back on to his haunches. “Would you mind if I sucked you off?”

“Would I _mind_?” Bucky stared at him incredulously for a moment, a hysterical laugh soon following, “Please! It’s only been in my fantasies since forever.” He made a light shove at Steve’s shoulder, the pair giggling.

“That’s a lot to live up to.” Steve chuckled good naturedly, blushing while he began to slide down the omega’s jeans. He traced his thumb over the obvious ‘pregnancy pants’ where the black cotton spandex above the denim accommodated the slope of his mate’s stomach.

“Trust me, my imagination wasn’t _this_ creative.” Bucky wiggled.

Steve slid down the omega’s boxers and pants in one smooth motion, breath hitched when Bucky’s pre-heat smell reached him. It was more concentrated now thanks to the amount of slick produced from his arousal and pre-heat.

It hit him in that moment what they were about to do. Steve paused for a few seconds, running his hands over Bucky’s hot skin while he catalogued his thoughts.

_Are we going too fast?_

Bucky looked back to him, holding his gaze intently. He was laid bare before Steve, naked and entirely exposed. All of his scars, burn marks, chest hair, stretch marks, and pregnant stomach in the light for Steve to see. Bucky didn’t fit the bill for a ‘traditional omega’, and Steve loved that about him. His Bucky was strong, fearless, and _perfect_.

He was the most beautiful thing Steve had ever beheld.

 _Steve loved him_ , and those words nearly poured from his lips, but his heart was racing too fast to catch his breath and muster the courage to tell him.

If Bucky’s smile and focused eyes were anything to go by, the omega already knew.

“You okay, Steve?” Only the slightest hint of insecurity colored his voice while he shifted against the pillows.

The blonde ran a hand across the omega’s stomach in consolation, “You look amazing, Buck. I’m a little overwhelmed- this feels surreal, you know?”

“Is that okay?” Bucky put his hand over Steve’s where it was resting against his heart.

“I’ve wanted this with you for so long…I’m just-“ Steve cleared his throat, “I’m excited and grateful to share this with you.”

Bucky clasped Steve’s hand. “Me too.”

The omega leaned up to kiss Steve, drowning out his worries while their scents whirled and combined together. He mouthed along the blonde’s jaw and throat, licking against Steve’s bonding gland in deliberate strokes.

The alpha undid the front of his own jeans, sliding them down until he was in nothing but his boxer briefs. Bucky watched him with lust-blown eyes, licking his lips in excitement at the thick, generous outline of the alpha’s cock.

“You’re not going to take them off?”

“I want to focus on you first, if that’s okay.” Steve admitted.

Bucky grinned, breathing deep, “I’m definitely up for that, but I want to get my hands on your cock when you’re through with me.” Steve promised as much, smiling into another press of their lips.

The blonde leaned back down to kiss the omega’s stomach, hands spreading wide over his mate’s pregnant stomach. He kissed a trail down the taut skin, Bucky giggling above him. He had always been ticklish on his stomach, even more so when light caresses were brushing against his sensitive skin. It made Steve’s heart leap in his chest, a broad smile gracing his lips while he watched Bucky’s relaxed expression, eyes twinkling with desire when they met.

Steve moved further down the omega’s body, closer to the musky scent of slick and pheromones that were unique to Bucky. The omega’s cock was heavy with arousal, resting against his abdomen and twitching when Steve breathed against it.

The alpha was eager, his mouth watering to taste. He licked his warm tongue up the underside of Bucky’s cock, reveling in the weight and feel of his mate’s dick while he ran his lips along the girth of Bucky’s erection. He didn’t have a lot of experience with pleasuring a male omega, but he was more than enthusiastic to practice and learn.

_(He might’ve watched a few videos online just in case.)_

Bucky’s dick wasn’t as long as Steve’s, nor did it have a knot at the base, but he was still a generous size with enough width to cause Steve’s lips to stretch wide to take in the head. Bucky groaned above him, breathing unsteady while Steve began to suck at the head of his cock, acclimating himself to the feel and slightly salty taste.

Steve couldn’t get enough of it.

Feeling emboldened by Bucky’s pants and the hand stroking the short hairs at the nape of his neck, Steve tried to take more of the omega into his mouth, choking slightly when the head of Bucky’s cock pressed against the back of his throat. He pulled off, gasping while a string of saliva and precum dripped down the corners of his mouth. 

“Hey, easy.” Bucky ran his hand against Steve’s forehead gently, “Try using your mouth and a hand? You don’t have to deep throat me.”

Steve huffed, smiling while he turned impossibly more red with embarrassment. “Haven’t done this in a long time. I’m a little nervous.”

“It’s been a while for me, too.” Bucky comforted. “Don’t worry about it. You’re amazing.”

The blonde kissed the inside of his partner’s thigh in gratitude, trailing his lips up while one hand grasped the omega’s dick lightly, applying measured strokes. The brunette moaned in approval, opening his legs wider while his upper body melted against the pillows behind him.

Steve licked against the omega’s testicles, rolling them lightly against his lips and deft fingers before going lower, pulling Bucky’s hips up when both hands grabbed at his ass, spreading him open for the blonde. Bucky gasped, his breath coming in hot when Steve pressed his tongue along his taint all the way back to his leaking, slick coated hole.

Bucky’s scent was highly concentrated in his slick. Steve couldn’t get enough of the musky aroma laced in with the sweetness of his mate’s pregnancy pheromones, his tongue delving in to the wet heat to taste more. He could feel Bucky wriggling against his mouth, trying to get more friction. When Steve pushed his tongue in more deliberately, he was rewarded with a satisfied moan. Bucky’s sounds filled the bedroom when Steve pressed a finger against the omega’s furled hole, pushing into the overwhelming heat with little resistance

Bucky was tight, but he opened swiftly for Steve, legs splayed to the side while he encouraged Steve for more, to go deeper while he panted in ecstasy. They were the most beautiful sounds Steve had ever heard, his heart hammering in his chest while his mind stayed solely focused on bringing his mate pleasure.

It was euphoric to taste and feel Bucky this way, glimpse of memories from their first time coming to mind. The blonde pressed in a second finger, pushing his fingers up against the sensitive spots that had Bucky moaning louder, body flushed while he called Steve’s name. He opened easily and Steve got a thrill out of licking and sucking around the omega’s taint and hole, making him melt into a puddle of lust.

Feeling confident, Steve took Bucky’s cock into his mouth again. He was crouched before him, one hand with three fingers pushing into Bucky’s wet heat while his other hand gripped firmly at the base of Bucky’s cock, stroking him while his mouth sucked at the top, cheeks hollowing out.

“ _Oh fuck_ \- Steve, I’m not gonna las’ long this way-“

Steve didn’t relent, his senses and body overcome with desire and emotion while he continued. He was bringing Bucky closer to the edge, cries growing louder into full blown yells, until the brunette seemed to snap underneath him.

Bucky gasped harshly, crying out a mix of curses and Steve’s name when he came hard. Steve did his best to take the omega’s cum, missing a few spurts when he looked up to watch his mate fall apart in pleasure. His hole was quivering against the alpha’s fingers, trying to get as much pleasure as possible.

Bucky’s legs were still shaking from sensory overload when Steve fingered a second orgasm from him, this one less intense but still powerful. A few more streaks of cum dribbled from his oversensitive cock, pooling on his stomach.

Bucky dragged at Steve’s hair, boosting him up to his level so that they could kiss heatedly. The omega snaked his right hand into Steve’s boxer briefs, gripping the alpha’s cock with purpose. He began running his hand tightly against the blonde’s thick erection, stroking him with the aid of his wet slick in his hand.

“ _Not gonna last long_.” Steve panted, eyes glazed with lust while he kissed along the omega’s jaw, desperate. He had been on edge the moment Bucky had begun wailing in pleasure.

True to his word, a few more strokes and Steve was shuddering into his own completion, groaning so hot and low that it might as well have been a growl. The sound made Bucky’s cock twitch, groaning along with Steve while the taller man trembled beside him with pleasure.

After his orgasm, Steve directed Bucky’s chin towards him, the pair meeting lips while they kissed lazily in the dim light. The brunette ran his hand through Steve’s hair, his body feeling relaxed and sated. The dull buzz of his heat drifted from his thoughts while he focused on his partner.

Their affectionate touches slowly began to taper off as it got later. Steve spooned up behind Bucky, warm and content with the feel of one another. It was quiet and heavy with emotion between them while they held one another in the omega’s bed, thoroughly content.

The alpha kissed Bucky’s temple before pulling the blanket up over their hips, his eyes drifting shut soon afterward.

*

*

Steve awoke blearily to the sound of the front door opening, his alpha instincts to protect rapidly pumping adrenaline through his veins. He propped himself up, pulling away from his mate to put on pants and guard the doorway into Bucky’s room.

His body eased when he realized it was his friends.

“We come in peace!” Clint called into the room, holding up three plastic shopping bags.

The pair made it inside, greeting Steve and taking in his obvious state of bare-chested undress with amusement.

“You didn’t do it on the couch, did you?” Natasha questioned, eyes narrowed.

Steve blushed, “We were in Buck’s room.”

Natasha held her hand out to her mate pointedly, “Told you. That’s $20, _babe_.” She kissed the corner of Clint’s lips, smirking.

Clint grumbled, handing over the money. He then set out to pulling items from the bags, lining them up on the kitchen island for Steve to inspect.

“We followed Bucky’s list. We’ll leave the stuff here so you can grab it as needed.” Clint explained, gesturing over the haul, “We’re also going to go out to the beach and spend the night at a hotel tomorrow. Nat and I figured we could give you lovebirds the weekend to enjoy one another.”

Steve was left somewhat speechless while he still tried to ground himself in this reality. He had just hooked up with Bucky, would be helping the omega with his heat, and had supportive friends who were unfazed by the change in the dynamic.

“Thank you for doing this.” Steve answered, feeling relieved that some preparation had been made to make their mating easier. 

“Of course. We’re happy you two are finally together and sealing the deal, so to speak.”

“And on the first date, too.” Clint snickered.

“I guess we were overdue?” Steve confessed. He opened up a bottle of vitamin water and began gulping some down, his throat parched. He grabbed another for Bucky.

“I’ll set out some scent diffusers so no one is sniffing at our apartment door. Clint and I will be leaving in the morning for our mini vacation, so don’t be alarmed.” Natasha held up one of the scent diffusers which looked a lot like an Airwick.

“We’ll try to keep it to the bedroom.” Steve vowed. “No guarantees about the shower, though.”

“You can bleach it when you’re done. The couch? Not so much.” Clint stated.

“If anything happens, just let us know. I’m sure things will go well for you both.” Natasha smirked, “It looks like it already has been.”

“We’ll behave ourselves.” Steve pledged.

The alpha thanked the pair again before scurrying back to the bedroom to rejoin his partner in the warmth of their bed. Being away from the brunette for too long made him antsy and nervous; an indication of a rut on the horizon.

Back in the bed with his and Bucky’s scent mixed together in the sheets, his heart rate leveled and body relaxed. He pressed against his mate’s back, nose buried at the nape of Bucky’s neck to inhale his sweet, earthy scent until he relaxed back into a restful sleep

*

Bucky’s pregnancy heat affected him more urgently by the following morning. The omega groaned against the pillows while he wiggled his ass back against Steve’s morning wood. The blonde had a hand on his hip, fingers gripping lightly against the omega’s flesh every time he pushed up against the warm skin against him.

There were worse ways to wake up.

“Steve, c’mon, get up.” Bucky rustled against the bed, jostling his partner by the shoulder to wake him.

The alpha blinked awake, yawning, “’Morning.” Steve took in a deep breath and stopped mid-stretch immediately when his nose registered Bucky’s full heat scent. “ _Oh_.”

Bucky smirked, glancing behind his shoulder, ass still pushed against Steve’s hard cock. The blonde gasped, running his length between the omega’s slippery ass. “ _Christ, Buck_.”

“You read those guides, yeah?” Bucky teased. His blush was high and warm against his skin, spreading from his face all the way down to his fingers and toes. A light sweat broke across his brow when the head of Steve’s cock caught against his sensitive rim.

“Do you want to do it like this?” Steve questioned carefully. He ran his hand up Bucky’s hip to his waist in gentle strokes. The soft touches only made Bucky more wet and he nodded, brows furrowed as he began to push back against the head of Steve’s cock.

The alpha cursed under his breath, inhaling deeply when they began to join together. He had been expecting this today, but not exactly first thing in the morning. However, he gazed at the elegant slope of Bucky’s back in the morning sunlight and his heart picked up rhythm, enthralled by the beauty of his mate. He wanted this with Bucky, and was happy to start his day as such.

It took a few moments for Steve to sink in fully. Bucky had to pause every few seconds, adjusting to the sizable girth of Steve’s cock until he could take more. The slick helped alleviate the stretch, and by the time Steve bottomed out inside of him, Bucky was a panting mess scrabbling with the blankets and pillows for control.

Their position spooned against one another wasn’t the best for leverage in the long run, but they enjoyed the steady pace Steve set. He maneuvered his hips carefully, still conscientious of Bucky’s stomach and careful not to hurt him by going too hard.

However, after a few minutes of grinding and panting, Bucky wasn’t having it. “Please fuck me, Steve. C’mon, just pound into me. _You’re driving me nuts_.”

“Bossy.” Steve admonished teasingly. He pulled out and encouraged Bucky to rise up on his hand and knees, pushing a few soft pillows underneath the omega’s stomach to support the extra weight. “Is this okay?”

“Mmm, yeah, I can grip the bed.” Bucky moved his forearms to brace against the wooden headboard, his voice breathy with arousal. Steve checked over their position, hands roaming across the omega’s body before pushing back inside of him with a gasp.

Bucky cried out, pushing back eagerly. With steadier footing, Steve was able to push in deeper and rub against the areas that caused his mate to groan and sigh with delight. He set a harder pace this time around, fucking up into the tight heat with vigor while Bucky begged and babbled for more.

Somewhere in the back of both of their minds, they realized this was their first time sober going all of the way. It brought a blissed out smile to Bucky’s face, his heart singing in his chest while his body soaked up the attention from his devoted alpha. As for Steve, he couldn’t think of anything but Bucky and wanting to give him whatever he needed.

The softness of the early morning light and the sounds of their skin against skin, voices panting and crying out for one another burned in the pit of Steve’s stomach. He wanted to somehow paint this moment; savor and remember it always while they grinded and gasped with each other.

It was overwhelming to finally be with the one they loved.

Steve’s rapidly growing knot caught on Bucky’s rim with every down stroke, the omega panting roughly with every pull. Steve kissed against his neck, soothing, “Do you want my knot this time? We can wait-“

“No, _fuck_ , I want it, _please_.”

Bucky was nearly desperate for the extra give; the nearly intolerable feel of a thick knot stretching him to full capacity. Steve slowed his pace slightly to rub his fingers along Bucky’s rim, coaxing his mate to relax until the knot began to push inside.

“ _Holy fuck_.” Bucky wheezed when the knot finally bullied its way inside, locking them together.

Steve picked up his pace again, more grinding than thrusting while his knot teased against Bucky’s rim, filling with blood while Steve edged closer to his orgasm, panting and incoherent.

Bucky’s toes curled, fingers gripping the headboard fast while he slumped his head against his left arm stub, pushing back desperately for release.

As soon as Steve’s hand began to stroke the omega’s cock, Bucky was gone.

A full body orgasm rocked the omega, his body tightening around Steve who followed soon after, knot fully formed as they locked together. Steve mouthed at Bucky’s neck around his bonding gland, scent-drunk from the pheromones his mate was secreting, inviting him to bond with him. Bucky shivered every time Steve grazed his teeth along his sensitive gland, but the blonde wouldn’t bite down.

It would be for another time.

When Steve could finally catch his breath, he slowly angled them back to their original position at their side. It was difficult when they were both loose-limbed and barely coherent enough to string together two words, but they somehow managed.

When they laid to their sides, Bucky shifted again, his hole clenching enough to pull another orgasm from his alpha.

Steve moaned long and low, the slow burning embers of a rut sparking in his stomach. He knew that whenever Bucky was ready for another round, he would still be ready to go.  

“You raring for round two there, Steve?” Bucky chuckled, his voice wrecked with emotion.

Steve pushed his hips up against the omega purposely. “For you? Yes.” Thoughts of food or water were a far off concept when he was inside of his mate, desire thrumming through his veins.

Bucky grinned, delighted, “Think we can go another round before breakfast?”

“I think we can manage.” Steve mouthed along his neck and jaw, grinding his knot inside of the omega. Bucky groaned for more, his dick standing at attention to be stroked.

Steve would be damned if he left his mate even the tiniest bit unsatisfied.

For the next few days, his sole focus was the pleasure and well-being of his omega.

Bucky was glad to bask in the attention.

*

*

*

_Two days later_

Steve was lying on his back, stretched out on Bucky’s bed while he continued to lounge in the comfortable afterglow of their latest lovemaking session. They were both coming down from their heat and rut, the daze of their brains making way for some clarity.

The alpha enjoyed the quiet of the room, his ears picking up on the sounds of traffic outside and the shower down the hall, where Bucky was currently washing off the cum and sweat from their tryst. Steve smiled to himself, his ass still tender and sore where Bucky had penetrated him earlier, rutting against him until Steve had been seeing stars.

Sure, the blonde had experimented with college, but Bucky was the one to ‘pop his cherry’ so to speak in this department. It felt good; felt _right_ to share it with him.

He was close to dozing off into a nap when his phone beeped loudly. The alpha yawned, wondering if Sam was checking on whether or not he was still alive.

He wasn’t expecting Becca to be on the other end.

 **Becca B.** : How’s my twin doing? I hope you’re taking good care of him. ;) *eggplant emoji*

 **Steve R**.: Buck is feeling better. Everything is good!

 **Becca B.:** Did you mate with him yet??? The family is expecting to see a bond mark at our next family gathering.

 **Steve R**.: When we’re ready, we will. Promise!

 **Becca B**.: MATE WITH MY BROTHER! We have money on this.

A few angry emojis followed and Steve couldn’t help but to laugh.

 **Becca B**.: Cowards

 **Steve R**.: How much money? I feel like I need to get into this betting pool.

 **Becca B.** : It’s exclusively between the Barnes women. So hurry, you’re basically true mates anyways. We’ve known since we were kids.

Steve paused at the expression.

He knew Bucky would be his mate, but the more he thought about it, he wondered if there was something deeper there…if they were so compatible that biologically they were made for one another as ‘true mates.’ It wasn’t a small claim, and the weight of it swirled around in his head, ringing true at every turn.

It would explain a lot. From the easy way they could interact and care for one another, to the reason why Bucky conceived on their one night stand together months ago.

He mulled over the expression, the puzzle pieces seeming to fit together effortlessly.

_True mates._

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for waiting so patiently for this. <3 Hopefully this chapter was worth the wait! And again, thank you for all of the love and support! It truly means the world to me. <3  
> (Writing smut is really not my specialty, but I did my best!)  
> Up next: Baby shower, bonding, Lamaze, and the final stretch towards parenthood!!  
> [My tumblr](http://valkyriegail76.tumblr.com/)  
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/AmethystValkyri)  
> 


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